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Forum
-> Chinuch, Education & Schooling
amother
OP
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Wed, Jan 06 2021, 11:20 am
I am trying to improve my relationship with my six year old dd. She is a very sweet girl who is very emotionally aware and picks up very fast and easily when others are happy sad excited hurt etc.
On the flip side she is an extremely strong minded stubborn child and I am davening that there are no anger issues. She is a very poor listener and does not do well when things don't go her way. I am constantly threatening her to get her to comply. This morning she would not get dressed. I said Leah, if you don't get dressed I will not let you have a wafer in the car on the way to school. She also took something out of my closet that she loves to touch but she knows she is not allowed to. I took it away from her and yelled at her pretty loud "LEAH YOU KNOW YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO TOUCH THAT WHY DO YOU ALWAYS TOUCH IT." I must have seemed very upset because she left my room crying. I need to take a more positive approach with her. Any advice for books that I can read. makes no difference jewish or not but has to be an easy read.
I bought how to talk so (little) kids will listen and listen so they will talk and maybe got up to page ten. The book was not my style.
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mha3484
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Wed, Jan 06 2021, 11:23 am
I have a kid like this. The explosive child has been a game changer. Also the whole brain child and no drama discipline were very good too.
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amother
Forestgreen
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Wed, Jan 06 2021, 11:23 am
Discipline without Damage by Dr. Vanessa LaPointe is excellent.
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amother
Orchid
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Wed, Jan 06 2021, 11:25 am
I found going to a parenting course changed my whole parenting style aka perspective and changed my kids too for the better.
The books are good tips but there is nothing like hearing it coming from someone.
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amother
OP
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Wed, Jan 06 2021, 11:29 am
amother [ Orchid ] wrote: | I found going to a parenting course changed my whole parenting style aka perspective and changed my kids too for the better.
The books are good tips but there is nothing like hearing it coming from someone. |
I agree with you that is a lot better to hear from someone than to read. I have little kids and its very difficult for me to get out at night. Is there a specific person that you recommend I listen to/watch their videos on parenting?
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amother
Orchid
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Wed, Jan 06 2021, 11:39 am
amother [ OP ] wrote: | I agree with you that is a lot better to hear from someone than to read. I have little kids and its very difficult for me to get out at night. Is there a specific person that you recommend I listen to/watch their videos on parenting? |
Blimie Heller.
I used to be afraid and scared of my kids, now I enjoy interacting with them.
- I can tell you the most important thing I learnt from her is children are not trying to manipulate or control us! All they want is our attention. we need to give them positive attention so they dont try to get it from doing negative actions
-empathy - put yourself in your child's shoes - feel for them and try to understand them
-validate them
**it takes a lot of work and change can take months.
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fbcmom
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Wed, Jan 06 2021, 11:47 am
Hold onto your kids by Gabor Mate
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amother
Forestgreen
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Wed, Jan 06 2021, 12:02 pm
amother [ Orchid ] wrote: | I found going to a parenting course changed my whole parenting style aka perspective and changed my kids too for the better.
The books are good tips but there is nothing like hearing it coming from someone. |
Just to present the other side, I took a highly recommended parenting course and got more from reading the book I posted about above than I did from the course. It’s a very similar philosophy and I just appreciated having it in articulate writing, but everyone learns differently.
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amother
Mustard
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Wed, Jan 06 2021, 4:00 pm
For a child with that temperament I highly reccomend the book "kids are worth it!" by barbara coloroso.
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shoshana2
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Wed, Jan 06 2021, 9:01 pm
"Transforming the Intense Child" by Howard Glassman
Nurtured Heart Approach
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HakarasHatov
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Fri, Jan 08 2021, 9:06 am
“spare the child” R’ Yechiel yaakovson.
Btw how to talk to little kids book is on audible. It was easier for me take in the info by listening than reading the book.
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