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amother
OP
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Sun, Mar 19 2023, 1:24 am
My son is almost 7. I don't allow him to play. Outside alone yet but he's begging me because so many kids on my block his age do, and some even younger. Am I being overprotective or these parents just being negligent?? (BP btw)
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amother
Arcticblue
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Sun, Mar 19 2023, 1:34 am
I'm pretty protective but at that age I would allow if other kids are out & I would pop out every couple minutes to check.
Make some very clear ground rules like you can only get bet x houses & if he wants to go into a house he needs permission. Also never protect your bike if someone is trying to steal it, just run home.
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amother
OP
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Sun, Mar 19 2023, 1:38 am
I should also mention that I live on a block with a lot of driveways. That scares me a little too.
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amother
Obsidian
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Sun, Mar 19 2023, 1:38 am
I live in Monsey and I let my 4 yr old play outside ( tog with my 7 yr old). I check on them constantly and I have a eye around my property. I don't know about Boro park though..... Way more random people walking the streets. But it definitely depends on how responsible and safe the kid is. When my 7 yr old was 4 I couldn't let him outside alone as he wasn't safe. My now 4 yr old is a very cautious kid by nature.
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amother
Petunia
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Sun, Mar 19 2023, 1:48 am
Depend on your block and some other factors like
What are the ages of the other kids?
Can you keep an eye?
Does your kid understand and know basic safety rules? Don't answer any adults if they talk to you (adult should get directions and info from other adults()or call you to their vehicle and definitely never to go somewhere with them even for a minute ? Don't go to any neighbors house without letting mommy or totty know before.
I set up some rules with my 8 and 10 y o and if they're playing on a longer block or around the block or out of my sight I ask them to call me or ring the bell at a certain time (an hour later...) jut to check in . No need to be paranoid but its best to error on the side of caution and follow your own senses.
Some kids are more spaced out and lack the social awareness and skill of what to do when a problem arises... I've had an incident where a male stood ifo out house and took pic of the girl playing. Glad dd knew to come in and lmk or ring the bell.
Bp too btw
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amother
Oatmeal
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Sun, Mar 19 2023, 1:55 am
No way at 7. I live in BP and would say at 10.
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amother
Dandelion
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Sun, Mar 19 2023, 2:14 am
Literally no way never. And the people that do...are you kidding???
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amother
Junglegreen
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Sun, Mar 19 2023, 2:14 am
amother Dandelion wrote: | Literally no way never. And the people that do...are you kidding??? |
Just curious, how old are your children?
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Iymnok
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Sun, Mar 19 2023, 4:58 am
I told my son that he could play between Aryeh’s house and Dovid’s house. If he wants to go inside anyone’s home, he needs to ask. Same with going further with a friend.
This was a few years ago. We are in Israel which is different. He is 11 now and has much more lax rules.
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top mom
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Sun, Mar 19 2023, 5:05 am
amother Obsidian wrote: | I live in Monsey and I let my 4 yr old play outside ( tog with my 7 yr old). I check on them constantly and I have a eye around my property. I don't know about Boro park though..... Way more random people walking the streets. But it definitely depends on how responsible and safe the kid is. When my 7 yr old was 4 I couldn't let him outside alone as he wasn't safe. My now 4 yr old is a very cautious kid by nature. |
A 4 year old is very young, even if it seems like he's cautious by nature. At that age they lack the maturity for dealing with many situations.
My mature, extra cautious 6 yr old dd ran right into a car when I was picking her up from a playdate.
She's ok now bh,but no mother should ever have to witness that sight.
Trusting a 4!!! year old?
I wouldn't.
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amother
Aconite
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Sun, Mar 19 2023, 5:31 am
top mom wrote: | A 4 year old is very young, even if it seems like he's cautious by nature. At that age they lack the maturity for dealing with many situations.
My mature, extra cautious 6 yr old dd ran right into a car when I was picking her up from a playdate.
She's ok now bh,but no mother should ever have to witness that sight.
Trusting a 4!!! year old?
I wouldn't. |
It very much depends on the exact situation.
I live in a development with a fenced in private playground. It’s the road, the parking lot, and then the playground so there are no zooming cars anywhere nearby. My windows face the playground and the parking lot so I can keep an eye. I let my 3 and 4 yo out when there are other adults (neighbors) with their kids in the playground. They know the rule is only in the playground and if I see them outside not heading directly home I bring them right in. (I understand not everyone would be comfortable with that even in such a scenario, just saying that you can’t judge by one post without knowing all details.)
Not that it happened too often they usually only want to go if I do too…
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amother
Milk
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Sun, Mar 19 2023, 5:55 am
amother Petunia wrote: | Depend on your block and some other factors like
What are the ages of the other kids?
Can you keep an eye?
Does your kid understand and know basic safety rules? Don't answer any adults if they talk to you (adult should get directions and info from other adults()or call you to their vehicle and definitely never to go somewhere with them even for a minute ? Don't go to any neighbors house without letting mommy or totty know before.
I set up some rules with my 8 and 10 y o and if they're playing on a longer block or around the block or out of my sight I ask them to call me or ring the bell at a certain time (an hour later...) jut to check in . No need to be paranoid but its best to error on the side of caution and follow your own senses.
Some kids are more spaced out and lack the social awareness and skill of what to do when a problem arises... I've had an incident where a male stood ifo out house and took pic of the girl playing. Glad dd knew to come in and lmk or ring the bell.
Bp too btw |
Yes. Very good points.
Im taking advice from it oo.
I let my 10 yo out by herself from a few years ago but my next child , 8 I still check up on him all the time.
Depend on the child. Each childs personailty and maturity is different.
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amother
Dandelion
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Sun, Mar 19 2023, 7:46 am
My oldest is 7. And of course if you live in RBS and your kids are running down to play in the playground below your building with their friends, that's totally different! But in BP with driveways (!) and anyone walking down the street, no way.
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amother
Orchid
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Sun, Mar 19 2023, 8:10 am
I have a fence around my property but it's not locked. I also have windows so I can see out. We moved into this house when my oldest was 8. I let her and my other kids play outside and checked on them periodically. My oldest is 11. She can watch my 2 year old so I let all of them play outside. Would I let my 7 year old outside alone? If I am not busy.
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amother
Seablue
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Sun, Mar 19 2023, 8:26 am
I live in Flatbush on an all frum block and let my 4 yr old outside alone but constantly check on him and he is very responsible never goes in street etc. So much depends on block and the kid
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amother
OP
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Sun, Mar 19 2023, 8:45 am
Wow, I see this is very controversial.
My 7 year old is aware of staying away from the street, but it's still the driveways that I'm afraid of. I guess he would need to stay near my house if I do let him out.
There are 5 year olds running around here on their own too. Even noticed a 2 year old running out of their house themselves and the mom came out 5 minutes later all relaxed. My older son witnessed this and just stood outside to make sure he doesn't run into the street.
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amother
Firebrick
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Sun, Mar 19 2023, 8:47 am
amother OP wrote: | My son is almost 7. I don't allow him to play. Outside alone yet but he's begging me because so many kids on my block his age do, and some even younger. Am I being overprotective or these parents just being negligent?? (BP btw) |
9 with me constantly checking. 10 alone if they know and are responsible to check in every once in a while and come in to let me know first if they're going into someone's house, crossing over to the other side.
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amother
NeonYellow
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Sun, Mar 19 2023, 8:49 am
Really place and kid dependent
Mainly place
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amother
Dodgerblue
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Sun, Mar 19 2023, 9:21 am
I live in Flatbush (on a safe block) and I don’t let my 8 year old play outside by himself. There are crazy people out there.
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wiki
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Sun, Mar 19 2023, 9:32 am
On a block without driveways, I started letting at age 6.
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