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Forum
-> Parenting our children
-> Our Challenging Children (gifted, ADHD, sensitive, defiant)
amother
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Tue, May 09 2023, 10:02 pm
Ds age 12, just told me he’s been calling inappropriate numbers, to learn about inappropriate adult topics. He’s gotten quite the education. And has been communicating with strangers on the phone. I’m beyond horrified. Didn’t even realize these things still exist! he got the first number from the radio in my car, when he was waiting for me, and that number gave him some more. I don’t know the numbers.
How do I lock the ability to call these numbers from all phones, hours, cells, etc? And any other adult numbers like this that I don’t know the number, but it’s an adult line?
I’m not tech savvy at all.
Please help!
Also any refs for a therapist, or parental guidance that can help me navigate this?
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Rappel
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Tue, May 09 2023, 10:14 pm
Under what context did he tell you about this?
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amother
Oldlace
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Tue, May 09 2023, 10:23 pm
Don’t have to freak out
He wants answers and to understand
Speak to him calmly and nonchalantly and answer his questions. This is a part of life and not a big deal. Him calling places to get answers is sad - let him speak to your husband or you and jsut get facts
He doesn’t need a therapist
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nnmom
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Tue, May 09 2023, 10:26 pm
So impressed with him and you that he came forward with the information!
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amother
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Tue, May 09 2023, 11:11 pm
Yes I’m glad he was open and honest with me. We’ve been having discussions about life the past few weeks, as he learned some things from friends. I always answered him what he asked and kept the conversations open, but I’d only work with what he asked me, or what he already knew. I didn’t want to go on an all out education seminar with such a young kid. But he was still curious and didn’t trust I was telling him everything, so decided to try these numbers.
I explained about safety, how talking and connecting with strangers is so dangerous, I still want to block the ability to call these numbers from our phones. How do I do that?
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amother
Seablue
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Tue, May 09 2023, 11:52 pm
My friends and I called these numbers for years and turned out perfectly fine.
Do teach him about the safety aspect though, and to never share personal or CC info
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amother
Brown
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Wed, May 10 2023, 12:42 am
amother OP wrote: | Yes I’m glad he was open and honest with me. We’ve been having discussions about life the past few weeks, as he learned some things from friends. I always answered him what he asked and kept the conversations open, but I’d only work with what he asked me, or what he already knew. I didn’t want to go on an all out education seminar with such a young kid. But he was still curious and didn’t trust I was telling him everything, so decided to try these numbers.
I explained about safety, how talking and connecting with strangers is so dangerous, I still want to block the ability to call these numbers from our phones. How do I do that? |
What a horrifying experience as a parent!
Seems that your son was right in that you weren't telling him everything so he went to find out on his own. Perhaps it would be worthwhile, despite your own discomfort to have that more open conversation you didn't want to have. 12 is not such a young child.... already their bodies are beginning to change and better he gets whatever information about life directly from you, preemptively, as in you have to be forthcoming and NOT wait for him to come to you with questions as you previously mentioned. I wouldn't think he needs therapy, rather just to feel that you're being completely open with him (which btw that is not the same as getting into the nitty gritty details)
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motheroftoo
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Wed, May 10 2023, 12:50 am
There is a book that recently came out I think it's called from boys to men.
Might be worthwhile to go through it with him.
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