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Forum
-> Parenting our children
-> Teenagers and Older children
amother
OP
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Mon, Aug 21 2023, 9:00 pm
My daughter is 12 and very light-haired. She asked a few times, but now she's really begging. I told her once she starts, it's gonna be a pain, but she's insists she doesn't care. I guess she saw all he friends in camp shaving. Can I keep pushing her or is it time? I really can't remember when I started.
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amother
Phlox
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Mon, Aug 21 2023, 9:03 pm
My 12 year old daughter is using a hair bleach cream from the age of 10. She has dark hair. She doesn't want to wax or shave.
If she wants to shave, I'd rather take her to get waxed.
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care4u
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Mon, Aug 21 2023, 9:10 pm
I don't believe in telling a teen not to shave.
Why can't she shave? It's not like starting earlier or later makes a difference.
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amother
Blushpink
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Mon, Aug 21 2023, 9:11 pm
When ever they ask.... why not if it's important to them?
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amother
Cinnamon
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Mon, Aug 21 2023, 9:13 pm
I never "let". They never asked.
They started whenever they wanted to.
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amother
Blush
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Mon, Aug 21 2023, 9:13 pm
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amother
Vanilla
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Mon, Aug 21 2023, 9:14 pm
I never asked my mother if I can shave. I just started on my own. Probably around 11/12 years old.
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amother
OP
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Mon, Aug 21 2023, 9:16 pm
Im not opposed to her shaving, per se. It's just a responsibility that once she starts, she can't stop. Maybe I'm just a little sad(ish) to think how fast she's growing up.
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amother
Vanilla
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Mon, Aug 21 2023, 9:18 pm
amother OP wrote: | Im not opposed to her shaving, per se. It's just a responsibility that once she starts, she can't stop. Maybe I'm just a little sad(ish) to think how fast she's growing up. |
But that's her responsibility and decision, how does it affect you? Maybe you are just sad about how quickly she's growing up.. but please don't hold her back
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amother
Blushpink
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Mon, Aug 21 2023, 9:21 pm
amother OP wrote: | Im not opposed to her shaving, per se. It's just a responsibility that once she starts, she can't stop. Maybe I'm just a little sad(ish) to think how fast she's growing up. |
Why can't she stop once she starts? At that age I shaved like 1x per month sometimes longer. I think it should be left up to her. Her body, her responsibility.
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amother
Buttercup
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Mon, Aug 21 2023, 9:32 pm
amother OP wrote: | Im not opposed to her shaving, per se. It's just a responsibility that once she starts, she can't stop. Maybe I'm just a little sad(ish) to think how fast she's growing up. |
Why can’t she stop? I don’t shave during the winter and my hair grows to a certain point and then stops.
I started at 16 but I asked my mother and took a razor from shave the balloon activity. I wanted to starting from 14
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behappy2
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Mon, Aug 21 2023, 9:34 pm
I wouldn't make a deal of it. It would concern me if the child started at 9, 10 or earlier.
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amother
Melon
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Mon, Aug 21 2023, 9:36 pm
I wanted to start a nice few years before I did but I didn’t know how to ask my mom since it wasn’t spoken about in the home.
I see no reason to say no to such a request.
It would be beneficial to make sure she knows how to use it properly and safely and is aware of the other methods of hair removal so she can make an informed decision.
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amother
Lightgreen
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Mon, Aug 21 2023, 10:15 pm
My mom never gave me permission or spoke about it at all (thank you, schools that give a puberty talk in class) but she did see fit to randomly inform me like a year after I started shaving that it's normal to shave your armpits.
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coloredleaves
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Mon, Aug 21 2023, 10:43 pm
If she feels better about herself doing it (bc probably her friend are) then why not? She should Look out together in whatever way is normal in your area. That's good that she is socially aware.
Personally I would add that I shave almost every day even in the winter and even though in the winter I fully cover my wigs with black tights and I shave even when I'm in Nidda. I like the way soft legs feel and I don't like how I feel for myself when it grows out. Maybe its sensory. But id be upset if I wanted to shave and someone told me I couldn't. There are other personal care things I don't do as much as others- like tweezing - but this thing bothers me if I don't do . I like how smooth looks and feels for myself !
Last edited by coloredleaves on Tue, Aug 22 2023, 12:35 am; edited 1 time in total
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notshanarishona
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Mon, Aug 21 2023, 10:50 pm
What reason is there to say no? She is probably really self conscious if she keeps asking, it doesn’t seem nice to push her off.
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NechaMom
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Mon, Aug 21 2023, 10:55 pm
I too don’t understand the word “let” in your question?
If they mention it, there’s no reason to say no. It’s not a treat you get at a certain age. If they’re uncomfortable and want to shave you have no right not to “let”.
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amother
Thistle
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Mon, Aug 21 2023, 10:57 pm
I developed a little early and my mother was very strict that I couldn't shave because I was too young. I'm still traumatized by that summer that I was too ashamed to go swimming because I was not allowed to shave my underarms. Eventually I disregarded my mother and shaved anyway. I would never go by age when deciding to allow my daughter to shave. If she's already starting to develop she should be allowed to do what it takes to take care of herself.
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ayiddishemaidel
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Mon, Aug 21 2023, 10:58 pm
I never shaved till today and I have light colored hair.
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mommy3b2c
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Mon, Aug 21 2023, 11:57 pm
“Let” ??
When she wants to shave , she shaves .
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