bas mitzvahs | Imamother

zuncompany

Wed, Feb 02 2005, 10:43 pm

Quote:

I actually would like to continue discussing reasons for small/big bas mitzvahs.

and ideas for them because they could be so much fun...

I personally want to do something small.

sara

Tefila

Thu, Feb 03 2005, 12:09 am

Quote:

do something small

Yep this is what I will do ia"h a small melave malke in the house or chabad house! With her friends and classmates etc and make it meaningful. For my Bat mitzvah I learnt the whole pirkei avos, would want my daughter ia"h to do that too Smile

sarahd

Thu, Feb 03 2005, 4:55 am

Why would anyone want anything other than small and personal? In the school where I previously worked, the bas-mitzvah guests would work on making "project boxes" for hospitalized children, with craft projects, games, books and fun stuff. The woman who organized this would pick up the boxes and distribute them to the children. The girls had fun, used their creativity and came home with a great feeling.

gryp

Thu, Feb 03 2005, 10:01 am

on the other hand, when on shlichus, it is a great opportunity to have a "Womens only" night.
ive been to a bas mitzvah where they brought in a lady singer who taught everyone a few Jewish songs and dances, as well as performed. it was beautiful. the women got so into it, and realized there is such a thing as Jewish music.
they also learn about the mitzvos of women and how important and beautiful each one is.
of course they could have done this all a different time and made a simple bas mitzvah, but every event on shlichus is made into a real event!

Tefila

Thu, Feb 03 2005, 12:43 pm

Quote:

of course they could have done this all a different time and made a simple

It's only theoretical right now. But I think my daughters deserves to know and feel 'the beauty of the jewish women is within'. So for a Womens night I would choose another night probably.
and

Quote:

but every event on shlichus is made into a real event!

That's true since people tend to come to these things, and then there's an opportunity for kiruv!

mommy2

Thu, Feb 03 2005, 8:29 pm

When I was turning 12 I remember my parents looking up with me what the Lub Rebbe says about bas mitzvas. It had said, dont ask me to quote etc. cuz I dont know where, that you should not make it big. I think it was because of

Quote:

'the beauty of the jewish women is within'

so I had a nice party- like birthday party- but just as a meal for my class.

shayna

Thu, Feb 17 2005, 9:34 pm

for my daughters bat-mitzvah I made a nice milchig dinner myself and had her whole class and imediate family. She gave a nice devar tora and a teenage girl played a casio for dancing. They also made an arts and craft.

Motek

Thu, Sep 22 2005, 5:17 pm

here's another thread I started on the same topic (Bas Mitzva in Judaism section) not knowing/remembering this thread is here:

http://imamother.com/forum/vie.....2f5ab

here's what someone did - pretty amazing I think (X is the bas mitzva girl):

Quote:

I was very worried that the girls might make disparaging remarks towards X and/or the party and it would end up a bad memory for X, but thankfully it was really, really beautiful - both the physical and the spiritual parts. I'm pretty sure I didn't explain to you what we did, but we had a Brachos party, where each girl takes a food for all of the 5 brachos rishonos and says each brocha out loud and everyone else answers Amen to each brocha. Each brocha is a segula for different things, such as Borei Minei Mezonos for people who need parnassah, Borei Pri HaGafen for those needing a Shidduch, etc.

To start off, X spoke. Then the girls did a project, which was a wooden kit of a baker holding up a cake, and inside the cake is the brocha of Al HaMichya (sorry, I forgot to take a picture of that). Anyway, the girls had to put it together and decorate it, and they had a lot of fun with that.

Afterwards, it was time to eat and actually do the brachos party "stuff". To ensure that the girls cooperated, I invited X's Limudei Kodesh teacher from last year to speak and explain the concept to the girls, and she stayed to answer Amen to all the brachos. This was the part I was most worried about, but it really was amazing. The menu was selected by X and had to cover the 5 brachos - lasagna and ziti for Mezonos, little cups of grape juice for HaGafen, taco salad (don't ask, but it's basically a lettuce salad with a thousand island dressing but with taco chips crumbled into it) for HaAdama, a beautiful fruit platter for HaEitz and candy for SheHakol. Some of the girls actually asked who catered it!!

After lunch, we had a treasure hunt. We split the girls into 5 groups and each group had the same clues, but in a different order. All the clues had to do with brachos, and you had to know the answer to figure out where to find the next clue. An example of a clue was "Devorah made this for me. What brocha do I make on it?" Once they figured out that the answer was honey and you make SheHakol, they were told to find their next clue "where Devorah got her supplies" and the clue was in a flower bush. It was a lot of fun, and the winning group got their names in a lottery for a nice prize (that I was lucky enough to find in the 99 cent store!).

Then it was time for cake and dessert, and then the girls danced to the music we had playing until it was time to go home. It was really, really a lovely party and I believe that X will have wonderful memories of it.

Raisin

Sat, Nov 19 2005, 7:34 pm

Just be aware, even if you want to make a small party, do it in a special way. For my bas mitzva absolutley nothing was done that didn't happen for my 11th bday or 13th bday. Even my sisters, mother, female relatives didn't come. I still kind of resent it and have quite negative feelings. Then a couple of years later my community realised girls are people too, so my sisters had extra special parties, programs, bat mitzva clubs, whatever.

Personally I think theres no call to spend thousands on a bar mitzva either.