Call me a mean mommy but I was at my wits end

amother

Peony

Wed, Feb 21 2024, 4:26 pm

amother Cinnamon wrote:

I didn't read the whole thread but when my son was 3 he kept coming out of his crib and bedtime was really hard.

I got a tent from Amazon and it was amazing. I told my son the tent was to keep him safe from falling out of his crib and he loved it.

He wouldn't go to sleep until I closed the tent.

Some 3 year olds are not mature enough for incentive programs and don't have self control to stay in bed even when they are tired.

The tent really changed bedtime. Highly recommend.

100%!! My son could not care less what prize/card/incentive you gave him- that day, the next day anything. He literally did not know how to fall asleep.

CPenzias

Wed, Feb 21 2024, 4:28 pm

Crookshanks wrote:

The solution, sweetheart, is to unfollow the thread.

Sweetheart, can you please tell me how to do that?

CPenzias

Wed, Feb 21 2024, 4:29 pm

amother Eggplant wrote:

I did not once say any of those things.
You may not agree with my opinion, but don't put words in my mouth.
Oh, and just unfollow the thread if the notifications are annoying you.

For the love of Gd, how do I do that? I didn't know I could

amother

Lemonlime

Wed, Feb 21 2024, 4:35 pm

I had such a child we put a really high gate by his soor… just to keep him safe.. we did bench gomelah a few times. Please join a DBT class a parenting class… and personal therpay but don’t tell this to anyone in real life ever Acs Will be there the next day ( rightfully so) I would looooove to take this child in so u can get a brake.

amother

Mauve

Wed, Feb 21 2024, 4:54 pm

amother Linen wrote:

Agreed, I think it's worse than arm twisting.

Don't agree. Arm twisting can dislocate a childs shoulders which may need medical attention as a result.
Mom can be sued for child abuse..

amother

Linen

Wed, Feb 21 2024, 4:59 pm

amother Mauve wrote:

Don't agree. Arm twisting can dislocate a childs shoulders which may need medical attention as a result.
Mom can be sued for child abuse..

Didn't sound like it was hard enough to dislocate. Sounded like grabbing roughly and walking with child to her bed.

Not condoning, but really a child trying to get to mommy in the night because they are terrified only to find that their door is locked is a recipe for disaster in their future. They will likely be scared to lock bathroom doors or fitting rooms. Very triggering.

amother

Mauve

Wed, Feb 21 2024, 5:13 pm

amother OP wrote:

I have tried this. And at this point it's turned into a game and she keeps doing it. I thought by ignoring her and figuring she's not tired she'll eventually get tired. But last night she was up very late and I didn't want a repeat

Is it possible that said child is not comfortable with the weighted blanket and that is why she gets out of bed so often? There are some who don't do well with those type blankets. Some feel too hot under them as well.
I'm not implying that this is the situation here, it was just a thought that came to mind.

amother

Anemone

Wed, Feb 21 2024, 5:40 pm

CPenzias wrote:

If it happens over and over then they for sure won't forget or forgive but the op posted because she feels horrible about it so that leads me to believe that she is trying to work on herself so it doesn't happen again

But she's not because she proudly proclaimed how well it works the she even threatened to do it again.

amother

Anemone

Wed, Feb 21 2024, 5:41 pm

amother Linen wrote:

That wouldn't be described as twisting

amother

Linen

Wed, Feb 21 2024, 5:45 pm

amother Anemone wrote:

That wouldn't be described as twisting

What is twisting OP?

amother

Forestgreen

Wed, Feb 21 2024, 5:49 pm

amother Anemone wrote:

But she's not because she proudly proclaimed how well it works the she even threatened to do it again.

Proudly?? Nope.

She theatened in the heat of the moment. No she doesn't plan to actually do it again.

amother

Aster

Wed, Feb 21 2024, 6:03 pm

amother Forestgreen wrote:

Proudly?? Nope.

She theatened in the heat of the moment. No she doesn't plan to actually do it again.

How do you know that she doesn’t plan to do it again. Please show me where she indicated this. I really hope you are right here I just think you are making a big assumption.

amother

Linen

Wed, Feb 21 2024, 6:06 pm

amother Aster wrote:

How do you know that she doesn’t plan to do it again. Please show me where she indicated this. I really hope you are right here I just think you are making a big assumption.

Why would anyone write up a post about something they did that they thought was normal? With a title like "call me mean"

You can tell she feels bad. She's not posting here because she is proud and ready to use the same tactic again.

nicejewishgal

Wed, Feb 21 2024, 6:07 pm

For heaven's sake, everyone, we are really blowing this up. Mom lost herself for once. Seems to me like a good mom who wants to be better. Did she do the right thing? absolutely not. but from her post it was clear that she felt bad and she knows this is wrong. Can we stop the bashing? She already heard she needs help. Whats the use of chewing it over again and again and again?

amother

Peru

Wed, Feb 21 2024, 6:09 pm

Where is OP?
How did your dc fall asleep tonight? I sincerely hope it went/is going well.
I kept thinking about your daughter today...

amother

Anemone

Wed, Feb 21 2024, 6:22 pm

amother Forestgreen wrote:

Proudly?? Nope.

She theatened in the heat of the moment. No she doesn't plan to actually do it again.

The proudly part was her post, which was not in the moment. She wrote:

amother OP wrote:

With my 3yo tonight. How many times can I have patience for her when she keeps getting out of bed. I gently twisted her arm and told her I'll have to do it again if she gets out of bed. It worked. I tried everything else nothing worked

amother

Heather

Wed, Feb 21 2024, 7:09 pm

amother Linen wrote:

Didn't sound like it was hard enough to dislocate. Sounded like grabbing roughly and walking with child to her bed.

It can take surprisingly little force to dislocate.