Do your sons babysit? (not family)

honey36

Thu, Mar 07 2024, 10:03 am

TwinsMommy wrote:

I was a playgroup assistant and my husband came to visit me and meet the kids on a day off because he's great with kids. One of the moms started a rumor that he's a child molester. Few believe it, but enough do that he'll never again visit me while I'm subbing assisting. Or babysitting.

Why is it an assumption that if it's a boy or man, abuse or molestation is involved? Ladies. We all MARRIED men and are raising boys. Gender assumptions are stupid.

I gladly would have hired a male babysitter when my kids were young enough but everyone available was female.

Gender assumptions are not stupid. Males are much more likely to commit s-xual abuse than females. This is a statistical fact, not an opinion.

Sure, we all marry men, but when dealing with a vulnerable population (children) in a vulnerable situation (home alone with just the babysitter) we need to be extra careful.

My pediatrician always advocates for never letting boys babysit. I guess he dealt with too many bad stories R"L.

amother

Cappuccino

Thu, Mar 07 2024, 10:13 am

amother Mustard wrote:

Yichud is complicated for girl babysitters too. Wish there were boys available to babysit my sons 9 and 5. A teenage girl can't according to yichud

It's less complicated the other way around. Yichud starts for girls at 3 but for boys at 9, so there's a longer window for it to be acceptable to have a girl babysitting boys. Also if there is a sibling who is above a certain age (opinions vary, but 5 or 6 is pretty standard) then it's allowed. Ask your rav, you may be able to rely on that for babysitting for your boys. But yes, in your case, having a boy babysitter would be simpler.

Ema of 5

Thu, Mar 07 2024, 10:40 am

TwinsMommy wrote:

Downright crazy!!

amother

Papaya

Thu, Mar 07 2024, 10:43 am

My friend's husband is a rebbi and pretty often she has dorm bochurim babysit, especially when the kids are sleeping. Obviously only boys she knows well.

amother

Dill

Thu, Mar 07 2024, 11:07 am

Yes and no.

My boys are capable to babysit, but in yeshiva or school and not so available. All of then babysat at least once.
One watched a bunch of kids when the mother had a concussion, one watched cousins, and one the oldest was a 10 year old boy and the mother thought he'd be more comfortable with a male babysitter. None did babies in diapers, etc. More preschool-elementary school age.

theoneandonly

Thu, Mar 07 2024, 11:49 am

amother Seagreen wrote:

What age?
And is this location based?
how does he get to and from the family he is babysitting at?

He is 13, has done mothers helper for toddler age (playing with the kids while Mom is home) for a few years already. He recently started babysitting at nights for sleeping kids when the parents aren't home. We live in a walkable area so he walks to/from where he is going.