Do you consider where family when you choose where to live?

amother

Thu, Mar 21 2024, 8:24 pm

Do you consider schools, community and at what order is where your family live? I want to live near family but there are no good schools in this very small community.

amother

Moonstone

Thu, Mar 21 2024, 8:31 pm

Its whatever you prefer. If you rather move to have better schools and not live near family thats up to you.

amother

Mint

Thu, Mar 21 2024, 8:38 pm

Good schools are more important to me than living within driving distance of family.

amother

Moonstone

Thu, Mar 21 2024, 8:39 pm

What the issue with the school where you currently live?

amother

Dahlia

Thu, Mar 21 2024, 8:42 pm

We're planning to move and I would love to go to an oot community like 3hr drive from family. But I really wanna move next to my siblings and family also. It's such a hard decision I keep going back and forth. On one hand Im so close with my siblings so it's really hard. On the other hand I love the oot communities.

amother

Smokey

Fri, Mar 22 2024, 12:26 am

I grew up with no family nearby. In my opinion, because of my experience, that's just a bonus. I loved the city I grew up in, we had amazing neighbors and friends and the schools were great. My mother didn't like the city she grew up in and my father was a BT, raised in a city with no frum community. So my mother was happy to move when she got married.

DH and I made aliyah and none of our family have chosen to join us.

amother

Fri, Mar 22 2024, 1:12 am

I didn’t explain my question correctly. I live next to family in a state that the community is extremely small and the school is not good. Would you stay next to your family or move to a different state that you need to fly to visit in order to have better schools and selection of school for your children? And probably a bigger community also.

effess

Fri, Mar 22 2024, 1:26 am

I’d choose the one where my kids will go to the school I think is best for them.
But I’d also try to choose a place that if possible, be able to visit my family.

amother

Yarrow

Fri, Mar 22 2024, 1:59 am

Never did.
Got married at 18 and moved across the country. No family there.
Moved twice since, never thought about that

Elfrida

Fri, Mar 22 2024, 2:07 am

Your family can also move.

I don't know if you mean siblings or parents, but what happens if you choose to accept limited community and schooling options so that your children can live near their cousins, then in five years time your sibling moves for those exact reasons?

Parents might be less likely to move move, but it's not a given that they will stay un the same house.

amother

Smokey

Fri, Mar 22 2024, 3:06 am

amother OP wrote:

Yes, I would move away from family for better schools.

amother

Narcissus

Fri, Mar 22 2024, 3:33 am

I actually moved to get AWAY from my parents. They were bad parents growing up, then continued trying to harm me as an adult.

If I had great parents, I'd probably prioritize staying near them.

If I had okay parents, I'd probably move to a town with a great school and drive to visit my parents every now and then.

amother

Skyblue

Fri, Mar 22 2024, 7:15 am

Schools are far more important than being near family IMO

My nearest immediate relatives are 20 hours drive away. We have made lots of close friends here BH

amother

Cantaloupe

Sun, Mar 24 2024, 8:55 am

We live far away from both good schools and from family because that's where my husband has a job.