Camp Dilemma | Imamother

amother

Thu, Mar 28 2024, 6:22 am

My son is 11 years old and is still bed wetting. We started him on medication in the beginning of this year but it does not work consistently.
He is also not responsible about his bedding or pajamas, he lies about it (from shame) etc.
We signed him up for camp when we thought it was working but he was lying and hiding his bedding, long story, either way I'm not sure what to do.
Where we live there is no local full summer program for boys his age. Everyone goes to summer camp. There is one option a bit further out that is a sports camp but my son is terrible at sports. He is a nerdy studious type and it would cruel to put him there.
It's also cruel for him to go to camp bedwetting, he'll likely be teased all summer.
I'm not even mentioning the money that I spent paying for camp that is not refundable. I'm just not sure what to do right now.
Is there something that works better than the medicine for bedwetting?
Any advice on what to do?

amother

Antiquewhite

Thu, Mar 28 2024, 7:10 am

I have a child who deals with this at this age.
He takes the pills every night?
And they don’t always work?
Camp mothers do deal with this they usually ask for two sets of same linen so if kid has accident can quickly strip and put on new linen but looks the same.
I’d consider sending him with pull-ups and be creative somehow about getting rid of the dirty ones each morning. Maybe in a bag and then get permission to go late to davening to discreetly toss the bag ?
However: He does have to be responsible about it.
That’s the deal I made with my kids.
No one is ever in trouble for wetting the bed but I will be upset if you don’t tell me about it. I like to wash the stuff quickly in the morning. The rule in our house for older kids is strip the linen and put the wet linen and pajamas in the laundry room and I help them change and make the new bed.
My kid did take the hormones and after a year or so is slowly fading them out.
Is the dosage high enough? He’d have accidents but really not usual if taking the pills.

amother

Banana

Thu, Mar 28 2024, 7:22 am

Does he badly want to go? Talk to him.about what he will need to do to make it work ..ie not drink too close to bedtime, quickly strip and remake his bed when he has accident, be responsible to.go to infirmary daily to get his pills.
And go back to the Dr to raise dose of medicine

amother

Babypink

Thu, Mar 28 2024, 7:32 am

amother OP wrote:

There is one option a bit further out that is a sports camp but my son is terrible at sports. He is a nerdy studious type and it would cruel to put him there.

Are the kids nice at the sports camp and is the camp an accepting place for beginners? Do any other kids go there who don't play very well?

Could you try to cultivate some appreciation of sports and exercise, and some basic skills before the summer?

I am also a nerdy studious type, and not very physically coordinated, and I went to a high school that required participation in a sport every season. But there were many levels of options, and the staff and other kids were really nice about my unimpressive efforts. I found that, even though I never became a great or even decent athlete, I did improve from where I began and overall I benefited both physically and mentally from stretching myself this way.

But if the sports camp is aimed at competitive, skilled, players, who are already very good and looking only to get better and hone their skills, it would probably not be a welcoming place.

amother

Thu, Mar 28 2024, 8:43 am

The alarm didn't work, he's too deep of a sleeper.

The problem is he's not responsible about it. I have the same rules officially but he doesn't follow them.

He wants to go to camp but I would push it off another year (which is actually quite late around here) if there was a viable option for him locally. The sports camp is not for him at all.