S/o which middah are you working on and how?

OddoneOut1

Thu, Apr 11 2024, 4:43 am

I listen to podcasts and Torah anytime.
Mesilas Yeshairm, and then simcha and patience with my kids, tefilla and building a relationship with Hashem.

singleagain

Thu, Apr 11 2024, 8:23 am

effess wrote:

Ayin tov.
I’m trying to be better and seeing the good especially in ppl’s behaviors and words to me.
This midda is intertwined with dlkz, which is a good exercise for me to have a ayin tov.

DLKZ happens to be something I'd like to think I'm pretty good at One of the ways that help me develop that was the "what abouts"

I follow the pet peeves sub Reddit and one of the pet peeves that comes up often is people who don't like it when they're trying to give a peeve and someone says "what about" example "I dislike when an able bodies youngster won't give up their seat for an elderly person" and then someone pipes up "what about invisible illness" and the op says "obviously I didn't mean that"

There's usually always some exception that you will think is okay to whatever you're grumbling about. So I would suggest try to come up with more than one "what about" And you'll find that it becomes more natural to think like that.

amother

Forsythia

Thu, Apr 11 2024, 8:37 am

No idea what middah it is but I hate how I’m instinctively such a tit-for-tat person. Like she didn’t come to the bris I made so I’m not going to the trouble to go to the vort she’s making. Or I invited them twice so I’m not inviting them again until I get an invitation back. 😔

readreread

Thu, Apr 11 2024, 1:27 pm

Lashon hara. I'm a nosy yenta and I need to learn to mind my own business and focus on my own middos.

amother

Sand

Thu, Apr 11 2024, 2:59 pm

To focus on I really need and want and not give in to the " shoulds" in my head.

amother

Emerald

Thu, Apr 11 2024, 3:05 pm

Since the war, I've been working on Lashon Hara, which has made me aware of how much other people gossip which is making me feel holier than thou so now I'm working on that too.

flowerpower

Thu, Apr 11 2024, 3:08 pm

I think Imamother members can work on two things-

Jealousy and loshon horah

Thu, Apr 11 2024, 6:13 pm

Patience with my kids...

amother

Iris

Thu, Apr 11 2024, 6:26 pm

amother Emerald wrote:

Since the war, I've been working on Lashon Hara, which has made me aware of how much other people gossip which is making me feel holier than thou so now I'm working on that too.

Omg me too. I need to get over myself. I started working on myself a lot since 10/7 and I started thinking how amazing I am.

Its unbelievable all the ways the satan gets people even when they are trying to be better.

It helps to remind myself of all the people out there who are waaaay better than me.

amother

Purple

Thu, Apr 11 2024, 8:00 pm

I love this thread
Totally got me thinking
Probably patience, positive speech (and keeping quiet more often) along with LH, and Ayin tova

amother

Purple

Thu, Apr 11 2024, 8:03 pm

Oh and for sure less gashmius oriented