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Forum -> Parenting our children -> Teenagers and Older children
My daughter is practically an only child..
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amother
OP  


 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 10:36 pm
I have three children BH. My older son is almost never home. I have a teenage daughter and a toddler at home. My daughter is so bored in the evenings and on Sundays. Now with pesach vacation it’s even worse. She doesn’t enjoy reading and ends up watching so much. I don’t like it but I don’t know what else to do. Am I supposed to entertain her all the time? For those in similar situations, can you offer any advice?
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amother
Buttercup


 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 10:39 pm
amother OP wrote:
I have three children BH. My older son is almost never home. I have a teenage daughter and a toddler at home. My daughter is so bored in the evenings and on Sundays. Now with pesach vacation it’s even worse. She doesn’t enjoy reading and ends up watching so much. I don’t like it but I don’t know what else to do. Am I supposed to entertain her all the time? For those in similar situations, can you offer any advice?


Maybe she can find a job like babysitting, mothers helper, cleaning.
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amother
  OP  


 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 10:39 pm
amother Buttercup wrote:
Maybe she can find a job like babysitting, mothers helper, cleaning.

She babysits sometimes but she wouldn’t want a steady job.
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amother
DarkViolet


 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 10:40 pm
Can you clean / get ready for pesach together and then go out for lunch together?
I had a baby girl after a 8 year break. I’ll probably be like you in a few years Smile
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amother
Cadetblue


 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 10:41 pm
Does she have friends nearby?
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amother
  OP  


 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 10:43 pm
amother DarkViolet wrote:
Can you clean / get ready for pesach together and then go out for lunch together?
I had a baby girl after a 8 year break. I’ll probably be like you in a few years Smile

Yesterday we ran errands and went for lunch. Today she was bored all day. I can deal with pesach vacation, it’s a one time thing, but almost every evening she seems so bored.
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amother
  OP  


 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 10:43 pm
amother Cadetblue wrote:
Does she have friends nearby?

One friend, she gets tog with her every shabbos but almost never during the week.
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amother
Dill  


 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 10:44 pm
My teen who has a big space under her so is often bored hangs out with friends. Lots of play dates. Organizes ball games with a group of neighbors. Bike rides. Reads. Plays lots of one player games. 1000 piece puzzles. I got her how to books, how to draw, how to create cartoons, how to do origami etc..
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amother
  Dill  


 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 10:45 pm
Also talks on the phone a lot. Calls classmates, friends from camps etc…
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amother
Olive


 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 11:04 pm
Doesn’t she have homework? As a teen I didn’t have time to breathe let alone socialize. During the week. Was my HS experience unique?
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amother
Tomato


 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 11:17 pm
amother OP wrote:
She babysits sometimes but she wouldn’t want a steady job.
maybe she shld do an art class or sth
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giftedmom




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 11:18 pm
Why doesn’t she help you make Pesach especially with a toddler at home?
My teen has been either running errands, cleaning for Pesach, helping me cook, or watching the toddler.
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amother
  Dill  


 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 11:19 pm
amother Olive wrote:
Doesn’t she have homework? As a teen I didn’t have time to breathe let alone socialize. During the week. Was my HS experience unique?


Mine doesn't have from rosh chodesh nissan until after pesach
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amother
Smokey


 

Post Thu, Apr 11 2024, 11:58 pm
You have to put firm boundries on the watching and feel confident that after a few kvetchy days she will learn how to deal with boredom. Her boredom is hers to manage but she will never develop the tools if the screen is very available. Boredom is a blessing of potential for children.
(Ideally this is something to work on at a younger age so if this is something that bothers you, you might want to do differently for sake of the toddler)
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amother
Ebony


 

Post Fri, Apr 12 2024, 3:10 am
I know this was not your point and Ill probably get flack for replying with this, but please dont say your child is practically an only child when she literally isnt.
Not every child hangs out with their siblings, no matter the age.
Signed,
I literally do have an only child. Its just different.
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amother
Crimson  


 

Post Fri, Apr 12 2024, 3:27 am
My teenager is so busy she barely has time to sleep! Between schoolwork, extracurriculars, tutoring, keeping up with her friends in other schools, and her hobbies she is busy every minute on school nights. Friday afternoons she helps me, m"s she often goes out to see her friends, Sundays she often has plans due to her extracurriculars but otherwise she goes along with whatever we're doing as a family. There's a 7 year gap between DD and our younger children due to SIF so she doesn't have anyone else close to her age at home to do things with.

Does your daughter really not have anything to do at night? No homework, no hobbies, no friends to shmooze with?
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Bnei Berak 10




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Apr 12 2024, 3:30 am
A teenager is old enough to find herself something to do!
Get her to help and learn with cooking baking and how to run a house (unless you have staff who do all house hold tasks)
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amother
  OP  


 

Post Fri, Apr 12 2024, 8:46 am
amother Ebony wrote:
I know this was not your point and Ill probably get flack for replying with this, but please dont say your child is practically an only child when she literally isnt.
Not every child hangs out with their siblings, no matter the age.
Signed,
I literally do have an only child. It’s just different.

That’s why I wrote practically and not literally. Sorry for offending you.
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amother
  OP


 

Post Fri, Apr 12 2024, 8:47 am
amother Crimson wrote:
My teenager is so busy she barely has time to sleep! Between schoolwork, extracurriculars, tutoring, keeping up with her friends in other schools, and her hobbies she is busy every minute on school nights. Friday afternoons she helps me, m"s she often goes out to see her friends, Sundays she often has plans due to her extracurriculars but otherwise she goes along with whatever we're doing as a family. There's a 7 year gap between DD and our younger children due to SIF so she doesn't have anyone else close to her age at home to do things with.

Does your daughter really not have anything to do at night? No homework, no hobbies, no friends to shmooze with?

She has very little interest in hobbies and not a ton of friends.
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amother
  Crimson


 

Post Fri, Apr 12 2024, 8:56 am
Would she be interested in discovering new hobbies that she might enjoy? Does she have any particular talents she could turn into a business to earn some money?
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