Nosh on school trips -- is this a normal amount?

amother

Sun, May 12 2024, 4:42 pm

So I'm a very health conscious parent with who tries very hard not to make my children feel deprived while still maintaining my values. Trips were always tricky. I did NOT want my kids ogling everyone else's stuffed bags but I also couldn't stomach just letting them take oodles of candy so we always came up with what I hoped were reasonable limits, we would go shopping together and try to find things that would satisfy us both.

My oldest just turned 12 and is having a school trip this week. I decided she needs a little more independence so I told her I'm just giving her a budget and she can get whatever she wants. She was a little wary and didnt trust that I was really allowing it but I encouraged her and said shes big enough to make her own choices and promised I wouldn't comment at all on what she chose. I waited in the car and she went in by herself. This is what she came out with:

A big bar of milk chocolate
A family size box of Mike n ikes
A family size bag of jolly ranchers
A family size containers of Pringles
A family size bag of skittles
A bottle of sprite

Needless to say I had a heart attack and my stomach twisted itself into a tight knot but I kept a straight face and asked if she's happy. She said it's to share.

Now I ask all of you because clearly I'm clueless. Is this considered normal for bringing on a 7th grade school trip?? I mean, this is diabetes in a bag if you ask me. Plus a handful of autoimmune disorders. It seems wayyyy excessive, bordering on unsafe. I feel neglectful allowing my child to carry that much sugar to school. I promised I wouldn't comment so now my hands are tied but really I'm quite flabbergasted.

amother

Hotpink

Sun, May 12 2024, 4:46 pm

amother OP wrote:

I think its perfect if its really to share/communal.

For my kids I allow 2-3 nosh, 2-3 snack bags and one sugary drink. They take water also. Lunch if applicable...

amother

Sun, May 12 2024, 4:50 pm

amother Hotpink wrote:

I think its perfect if its really to share/communal.

For my kids I allow 2-3 nosh, 2-3 snack bags and one sugary drink. They take water also. Lunch if applicable...

Okay but even if it is communal, if everyone is pooling that amount of nosh they are all consuming that amount. And I don't really buy the communal bit. I mean, I'm sure she's gonna share, but I know my kids and they can eat a LOT of candy if no one's stopping them. Like a whole lot more than most kids. (And for all the haters, no it's not because I restrict them. Yes, I know for sure.)

amother

Chambray

Sun, May 12 2024, 4:51 pm

amother OP wrote:

it's definitely a huge amount! Kol hakavod to you for keeping a straight face! That must have been really hard. Hopefully she will share and if she doesn't she probably will feel very nauseous and it will be a learning experience!
I love your sense of humor!
As long as she doesn't have trips too often, she should be fine!!!

amother

Sun, May 12 2024, 4:52 pm

amother Steelblue wrote:

This is for 1 day??
If so, it’s way too much

Why does your kid need family sizes? Crying

I have no idea, and in the past when they tried to get them I always made them go back and change it for the single serving packs. I'm just as shocked as you. I though maybe she'd get 1 thing to share, but not every single item family sized...

I'm crying too. This kid struggles with her weight and with compulsive eating and I can't seem to ever get it right...

The only thing I can think of is that I made her budget too big.

amother

Sun, May 12 2024, 4:55 pm

amother Chambray wrote:

I don't have a sense of humor, I'm not finding it funny at all. This kid is already not fine. She's very overweight, a compulsive eater, craves sugar and junk intensely. Has other issues too. It's just that everywhere I go, I keep getting the message that restricting will make things worse. And even making comments is considered restricting. And I know she was sneaking stuff already. I guess it's lose-lose for parents like me.

ra_mom

Sun, May 12 2024, 4:56 pm

Let her keep it this time. It's better not to reneg on your words. Your relationship with her is important.

Next time before she goes in, tell her she can buy

2 snack bags
2 candy/chocolate type items
1 fun drink

Of which she can choose one of those to be family size, so she can share.

And she can add fruit, nuts and water from home to the above.

Last edited by ra_mom on Sun, May 12 2024, 5:00 pm; edited 2 times in total

amother

Sun, May 12 2024, 4:57 pm

ra_mom wrote:

It's a lot of candy, but if she kept within budget, let her be the star that shares this time. There's a benefit to that.
I really don't think she'll eat 3 family bags of candy, do you?
Just send along a container of cut fruit and a bag of pretzels to balance it out. I think she'll be looking for that at some point, to fill her belly.

I'm afraid she can pack away all that. I'm sure some will get shared in exchange for... other people's candy??

ra_mom

Sun, May 12 2024, 4:59 pm

amother OP wrote:

I'm afraid she can pack away all that. I'm sure some will get shared in exchange for... other people's candy??

This time I think you should let it go. Sigh. I understand how you feel. But it's not such a good idea to go back on your words. You'll build a lot between you and her if you let it go this time.
Next time you'll give different parameters.

giselle

Sun, May 12 2024, 4:59 pm

amother OP wrote:

I'm afraid she can pack away all that. I'm sure some will get shared in exchange for... other people's candy??

This one day won’t be what makes a difference. If this is an ongoing serious issue, it may warrant consulting with a professional about how to handle it. However be very careful with whom you consult, as some nutritionists do not deal with these things in a healthy way.

amother

Sun, May 12 2024, 4:59 pm

ra_mom wrote:

This is similar to what we used to do until now and honestly I thought she'd stick to similar guidelines, I just didn't want to be bickering over can she get gushers instead of a third snack and can it be the big Mike n ikes instead of the small.

I didn't expect this

amother

Sun, May 12 2024, 5:05 pm

imanotmommy wrote:

I remember wanting to bring tons of nosh on school trips, but not actually eating most of it-because I was busy, plus overestimated how hungry I'd be

My kids are not like that. They are large eaters in general and don't really have a stop button when it comes to candy. They never "forget" or are "too busy" or not hungry enough to eat nosh.