Visiting Boro park

samo

Wed, May 22 2024, 1:58 pm

We are out of towners (an airplane ride away) and invited to a boro park simcha in a few weeks- what can I expect? May or may not stay for shabbos. We are not chassidish

amother

Burntblack

Wed, May 22 2024, 2:02 pm

samo wrote:

We are out of towners (an airplane ride away) and invited to a boro park simcha in a few weeks- what can I expect? May or may not stay for shabbos. We are not chassidish

Honestly it depends where you stay. Upper avenues vs middle vs lower. Same for streets

amother

Bellflower

Wed, May 22 2024, 2:08 pm

samo wrote:

We are out of towners (an airplane ride away) and invited to a boro park simcha in a few weeks- what can I expect? May or may not stay for shabbos. We are not chassidish

What's this got to do with anything? I promise no one will treat you any differently.

samo

Wed, May 22 2024, 2:09 pm

Thanks, all. I’m not worried about treated differently. Just wondering what to expect as an “outsider”. We are being put up at a family and we do not really speak yiddish

samo

Wed, May 22 2024, 2:11 pm

Should I put my girls who are not yet up to knee sock in knee socks? They’re 4 and 7.
Will I feel self conscious in my lace top and heels?

amother

Bellflower

Wed, May 22 2024, 2:11 pm

samo wrote:

Thanks, all. I’m not worried about treated differently. Just wondering what to expect as an “outsider”. We are being put up at a family and we do not really speak yiddish

You do know that we speak English too right?

amother

Bellflower

Wed, May 22 2024, 2:12 pm

samo wrote:

Should I put my girls who are not yet up to knee sock in knee socks? They’re 4 and 7.
Will I feel self conscious in my lace top and heels?

OK wow! I'm not sure what you heard about BP or what you think this is. No one cares what you do here.

samo

Wed, May 22 2024, 2:16 pm

Well if I was hosting someone who wasn’t frum for shabbos she would probably feel uncomfortable showing up in pants and sleeveless. It’s nice to be respectful of ones environment. I’m just feeling it out Smile

Do the little kids also speak English? I have a bunch of little boys

amother

Crystal

Wed, May 22 2024, 2:16 pm

amother Bellflower wrote:

OK wow! I'm not sure what you heard about BP or what you think this is. No one cares what you do here.

I wouldn’t say this. But I think you need to think about the simcha you’re going to. Is the family very chassidish then they might be uncomfortable with a 7 year old in short socks. There are plenty of people here in lace top wigs but again you should find out about the specific simcha you’re going to.
Out in the street I don’t think you need to worry as much.
And most people in Boro park speak English between themselves and some speak yiddish to their kids.

amother

Peru

Wed, May 22 2024, 2:37 pm

samo wrote:

Should I put my girls who are not yet up to knee sock in knee socks? They’re 4 and 7.
Will I feel self conscious in my lace top and heels?

No! No! And No!

You’re covering your hair (and even if you weren’t I wouldn’t care). Your daughters are 4 and 7.

This is Boro park not KJ.

mfb

Wed, May 22 2024, 3:09 pm

samo wrote:

Do the little kids also speak English? I have a bunch of little boys

A lot of kids speak English but it will depend what crowd they are in.

amother

SandyBrown

Wed, May 22 2024, 3:17 pm

samo wrote:

Should I put my girls who are not yet up to knee sock in knee socks? They’re 4 and 7.
Will I feel self conscious in my lace top and heels?

My girls wear knee socks and I wear a long wig and heels. Maybe I'm not a typical boro parker but you won't feel out of place.

amother

Green

Wed, May 22 2024, 4:17 pm

amother SandyBrown wrote:

My girls wear knee socks and I wear a long wig and heels. Maybe I'm not a typical boro parker but you won't feel out of place.

She was asking if her girls would feel out of place in bobby socks, not knee socks. Yes, they might, you dont really see 7 year olds like that.

amother

Steel

Wed, May 22 2024, 5:27 pm

samo wrote:

Should I put my girls who are not yet up to knee sock in knee socks? They’re 4 and 7.
Will I feel self conscious in my lace top and heels?

The heck????????????

amother

Bellflower

Wed, May 22 2024, 7:51 pm

amother Stonewash wrote:

OP, what exactly is your perception of Boro Park?

It sounds as if OP thinks wearing a lace top and heels in BP is like wearing sleevless tops and shorts elsewhere.
I'm just curious who gave you this impression.

amother

Stonewash

Wed, May 22 2024, 7:57 pm

amother Bellflower wrote:

It sounds as if OP thinks wearing a lace top and heels in BP is like wearing sleevless tops and shorts elsewhere.
I'm just curious who gave you this impression.

Yup, that's why I asked what exactly her perception is. There are some out of towners that know exactly what to expect and some that have been fed such utter bs. And as a native, you could pick it up in a second. It would be comical if it weren't so sad. That said, I'd love to right the wrong of what OP thinks this place is. We are a large community and not a monolith so different factions will have different expectations.

emee2

Wed, May 22 2024, 7:59 pm

I am an out of towner who lived in boro park. I personally would put my 7 year old in knee socks or tights not ankle socks. The 4 year old is fine. I think one of the big differences in BP vs OOT is that ppl don’t necessarily say good shabbos to everyone they see. And definitely not across genders. Boro Park is a very warm place and personally I find it much less judgemental than many out of town communities. Many women wear heels so you won’t feel out of place. I don’t live there currently but was there last week and did not see a lot of lace tops but I think that is really up to you unless you are going to a simcha with a shpitzel wearing crowd. If you are the type to be more self conscious and you have another wig then maybe wear that but it’s really a personal
Decision and nobody will say anything to you.

Mazal Tov and enjoy the simcha.