5 Year old DS not afraid of punishment

amother

↑ OP

Sun, Aug 16 2020, 6:07 pm

Wow so much helpful advice since I last checked. Yes the morahs love him and claim he is well behaved. He is super bright and probably not busy enough at home like many of you said.
I really appreciate all replies and will apply whichever I feel can help me. Thanks all.

Mommyg8

Sun, Aug 16 2020, 9:02 pm

amother [ Burlywood ] wrote:

My father hit and spanked us and that made us hate him and rebel more. 3 of my siblings are not frum because of this.

I recently read a story about the Chazon Ish, that he lived next door to a family where the father was very strict and often hit and punished and generally was very demanding of his children. The Chazon Ish told someone - you'll see, nothing will become of his children. And koch haya, some of his children became frei and others didn't do too.well in life.

I'll say this under my username- I am one of the "older" posters and I did punish my older kids a lot. I regret it very much till this day. I barely punish my younger kids at all and bh I have no trouble with them.

↑ trixx

Sun, Aug 16 2020, 9:12 pm

#BestBubby wrote:

Lock child in room if necessary. I doubt a 5 minute time out would be effective.
Some kids need stronger punishment to be effective.

I hope no one takes any parenting advice from best bubby, I've said it before and I'll say it again will respect due only to her age (and we do agree in other areas) - her bubby methods belong in the past.

Re the statistics you quote, those all come from secular sources and you can't compare the parenting that kids raised with TV and social media get, which is where the depression etc tend to come in.

Nobody said anything about letting your kids run loose and wild. But the definition of discipline isn't punishment. It's teaching, as in you know, actually teaching behavior. It's not a behaviorist approach at all and newsflash, conscious, respectful positive and attachment-focused parenting takes a million times more effort than all the hitting, yelling, time outs and punishments do. Those are all cop outs. Which btw don't work.