No, you CANNOT be an astronaut when you grow up, dear

chavamom

Sat, Jan 23 2010, 8:46 pm

WriterMom wrote:

Ruchel wrote:

I would not pick such fights with a small kid and crush his dreams. He probably will not want that anyway later, why give him the idea that yiddishkeit is something that gets in the way?

I'm with you.

Ditto.

shmoozer

Sat, Jan 23 2010, 10:13 pm

oh please! he's 4 yrs. old for heavens sake! my son says these things all day. just tell him that it sounds like a gr8 idea and go on. his mind will change 100 times in the next year if he's a normal child!

ilovedacb

Sat, Jan 23 2010, 10:13 pm

I wanted to be an astronaut and president when I was a child. I gave up on the president but never my crazy desire o go up into space. My Father A"S always said What a C"H you will make being the first frum woman in space and the first frum woman president. Now while I went on to be neither, I truly believe that my Father's words gave me the strength to preserver during some of the most challenging moments, including his untimely death. My Father's words gave me the belief that I could do whatever I set out to do in life. Now I am sure my Father did not really believe I would grow up to be either but I understand now that he wanted me to believe that the world was my oyster, regardless of being a girl and regardless of being frum. I have had to face what many would consider unsurmontable challeges but refuse to believe I cannot get over them, I choose to believe that I can do anything I put my mind to because my Father taught me I could. So for all you Mothers out there, encourage your children, encourage them to dream, give them the support they need to grow and believe that they can, and know that it does stay within them...

octopus

Sat, Jan 23 2010, 10:26 pm

and when I was 4, I wanted to be a ballerina, because I liked the pretty pink tutus. I got zero speeches about tznius, or "this is not what a frum girl should do." Guess what? I did not grow up and become a ballerina and I have zero desire to wear a spandex tutu.

amother

Sat, Jan 23 2010, 10:26 pm

My uncle is a frum guy who works for NASA.

(anonymous in case my aunt is on this board 8) )

My son has wanted to be (desperately obsessively wanted to be) a policeman, fireman, and a doctor. When he's 14 or 15 and talking about what he wants to be and understand what is involved in becoming that thing, I will take it seriously. Until then, it's, "WOW, you would be a fantastic ______! Tell me what you'd do if you were a _______. Let's read some books about being a _______."

Just have fun.

Fox

Sat, Jan 23 2010, 11:56 pm

This reminds me of the old story about the king, the rabbi, and the monkey:

The king of a small country -- and no great lover of the Jews -- summoned the local rav. "Teach my monkey to talk or I will obliterate the Jews in my kingdom," he demanded.

The rav thought carefully, and replied, "Certainly, your majesty, but I'll need five years to do it."

The king was none too pleased, fearing he'd been outsmarted, but he agreed.

The rav returned to the community, monkey in tow. The baalabatim were outraged that the rav had agreed to such a ludicrous deal, but the rav calmed them, saying, "Five years is a long time. In five years' time, the king may be dead. Or I may be dead. Or the monkey may be dead. Who knows? In five years, I may even be able to teach the monkey to talk!"

No sense getting overly concerned about youthful career ambitions. Your son may change his mind; he may find out he can't handle zero-gravity; who knows -- maybe we'll be reading someday about his experiences as a frum Jew in space!

MommyZ

Sun, Jan 24 2010, 12:59 am

amother wrote:

My husband is a frum police officer and he isn't the only one.

amother

Sun, Jan 24 2010, 1:58 am

MommyZ wrote:

amother wrote:

My husband is a frum police officer and he isn't the only one.

Right - I wasn't saying it's not possible. In fact, we did lots of research about what it would entail to become a policeman (for a frum person) and I never told my son "you can't". THe point is that at that age, it's usually just talk and the OP shouldn't overthink this, just have fun with her son and be encouraging and interested.

EvenI

Sun, Jan 24 2010, 3:20 am

I wouldn't do anything now to disabuse him of any dream. I might ask him some questions like what will you eat in space, what will you do on Shabbos, will there be a shul on the rocket etc. I mean, I would ask out of curiosity and to fuel his imagination. He'll come up with some great answers, most likely. And when he's much older, if he's still interested, you can start asking him if it's safe and what happens to most people who go up there...Let him figure it all out himself, and don't give him a clue that you have an opinion.

And I think you must help him to dress up as an astronaut for Purim.

Isramom8

Sun, Jan 24 2010, 3:35 am

You can use his interest as a jumping point to explore all kinds of fascnating laws of nature that Hashem made, and maybe later halachic questions in sefarim about space travel. I agree that only if he still wants to do this when he is older, say later-high school age, do you have to point out the realities of it maybe not being practical. One of my kids wanted to go into something that, while not "outlandish" like space travel, posed conflicts that I felt the need to make the child aware of in 11th or 12th grade. I didn't say there was no way to have that career, but I did bring up possible serious complications.

chanchy123

Sun, Jan 24 2010, 7:17 am

Why not?
My four and a half year DD also started asking questions about space. So I showed her pictures of space and planets I found on Google. I also showed her and DS the moon landing and a tour of a space shuttle. DD got all excited and said she would like to maybe go up in a space shuttle one day. And do you know what?
It would probably be a good career path for her.
When Ilan Ramon Z"l went to space he asked a whole bunch of shailas about keeping variuos mitzvot in space. And there was a lot of debate on halacha and space travel.
I would love it for my son to be a talmid chacham and an astronaut sounds cool.

Isramom8

Sun, Jan 24 2010, 7:27 am

My 11 year old daughter says to let the 4 year old say what he wants because he just thinks it's impressive, and when he is 18 he will decide and it's none of the mother's business. Wink

By the way OP, isn't that a space helmet on a cat in your avatar? Who's encouraging your son? LOL

LeahW

Sun, Jan 24 2010, 8:25 am

Isramom8 wrote:

My 11 year old daughter says to let the 4 year old say what he wants because he just thinks it's impressive, and when he is 18 he will decide and it's none of the mother's business. Wink

By the way OP, isn't that a space helmet on a cat in your avatar? Who's encouraging your son? LOL

LOL. Honestly I have no idea where he got the idea to become an astronaut. I think it's funny and adorable, though not really something I want for him. Of course you're all right, to humor him... but I think I'll also ask the poignant questions, like hmmm, is there a shul on the moon? LOL.

EvenI

Sun, Jan 24 2010, 8:41 am

LeahW wrote:

Isramom8 wrote:

My 11 year old daughter says to let the 4 year old say what he wants because he just thinks it's impressive, and when he is 18 he will decide and it's none of the mother's business. Wink

By the way OP, isn't that a space helmet on a cat in your avatar? Who's encouraging your son? LOL

Not what you want for him? Hmmm. Maybe you have a control issue that you should explore in therapy... When the cow jumped over the moon, do you think the cow's mother had a say in the matter? The cow must have been over 18, or it would have been a calf. The mother just had to keep quiet.

MommyZ

Sun, Jan 24 2010, 8:52 am

amother wrote:

MommyZ wrote:

amother wrote:

My husband is a frum police officer and he isn't the only one.

I wasn't implying that you told your son he can't do anything I was just pointing out that I know first hand it is possible Smile

LeahW

Sun, Jan 24 2010, 11:19 am

EvenI wrote:

LeahW wrote:

Isramom8 wrote:

My 11 year old daughter says to let the 4 year old say what he wants because he just thinks it's impressive, and when he is 18 he will decide and it's none of the mother's business. Wink

By the way OP, isn't that a space helmet on a cat in your avatar? Who's encouraging your son? LOL

Just saying, I prefer if my son chooses a profession where both feet are on the ground... I didn't say I would necessarily discourage him... Hmmm, maybe you should explore projection issues in therapy. Something you're not telling us? Wink

And if you're referring to me as a cow, I take offense!