S\o how do you come up with seminary payment ?

amother

Natural

Mon, Mar 04 2024, 6:31 am

amother Slateblue wrote:

Maybe this is for a spinoff, but based on my own experience in seminary, I have no desire to send my girls.

The level of learning was not high, it was either on par with what I experienced in high school or lower. Huge focus on lots of rote memorization.

The teachers were nice for the most part, ok.

The administration did not treat us girls in a way that I felt was respectful, overall. Which came to me as a shock.

I did love being in EY but that is separate from going to seminary.

Did you go to name removed 🙈

happy7

Mon, Mar 04 2024, 6:36 am

Finding money for seminary doesn’t happen after acceptance.
Before our daughters APPLIED to seminary, we reviewed the financial aid we could get for them. (We had some options but FYI, eligible NY residents can get both PELL and TAP.)
Only after we were sure we could make it work, did we allow them to apply. Most families actually CANNOT come up with $25,000 from now to June. It has to be something you preplan.

amother

Papayawhip

Mon, Mar 04 2024, 6:43 am

happy7 wrote:

My oldest daughter is 4 now.

Im starting to plan now. how much money do you think it will cost by then?? Can't Believe It

amother

Babyblue

Mon, Mar 04 2024, 6:45 am

amother Slateblue wrote:

What do you mean that you felted not respected by the administration?

amother

Eggplant

Mon, Mar 04 2024, 7:01 am

amother Slateblue wrote:

The administration did not treat us girls in a way that I felt was respectful, overall. Which came to me as a shock.

I agree. But I think overall there's a feeling of superiority and condescension towards seminary girls from American Israelis, especially from those who made aliyah & weren't born there, in general. That was one major thing that turned me off that year in seminary.

chestnut

Mon, Mar 04 2024, 7:06 am

amother Heather wrote:

I really feel like these posts are so skewed sometimes, with people who never sent and never would send expressing their opinions.

Where I come from 99 percent of girls go. It's definitely not just a party. The first year away from home, you mature a ton, yes have fun, and make lots of friends. Usually you're closer to sem than HS friends because of the shared experience. And for years after people talk about where they went. Anytime someone mentions they didn't go (not from an in town school where that's typical) they're always defensive about it.

There's also a ton of scholarships if you do it the right way and work hard. HS funds, seminary scholarships, Masa, FAFSA, local federation, local government, contests to submit essays to, etc.

Not a necessity but I think it's a pivotal year for so many.

I hear about this "maturing a lot" all the time. In what ways do girls in Israel mature? By taking buses instead of driving or being driven? By going to the Dr on their own? By living with roommates? Literally all this can be accomplished when staying home. You don't think girls who stay home and work and are in school require much more maturity and self discipline?
And no, there aren't many scholarships at all. In town, there are no HS funds, local federation, or local government funds. Not all seminaries participate in MASA. Not everyone is eligible for FAFSA and I'm not talking about rich families. Seminaries don't give scholarships to everyone.

Bnei Berak 10

Mon, Mar 04 2024, 7:13 am

happy7 wrote:

As you said, pre planning is the key. I asked if the application doesn't come with payment terms and conditions. So far no one replied.

little neshamala

Mon, Mar 04 2024, 7:15 am

chestnut wrote:

This exactly.
So many middle class arent eligible for scholarships.
And staying home, taking classes and working, dealing with a boss and needing a W2 and arranging your schedule and sending out a resume and arranging transportation etc etc etc. All that matures you.

chestnut

Mon, Mar 04 2024, 7:16 am

Bnei Berak 10 wrote:

As you said, pre planning is the key. I asked if the application doesn't come with payment terms and conditions. So far no one replied.

I think I applied in another thread.
I think the terms come with the contract once accepted. The application just has the amount. If I remember correctly.

Bnei Berak 10

Mon, Mar 04 2024, 7:20 am

amother Papayawhip wrote:

My oldest daughter is 4 now.

Im starting to plan now. how much money do you think it will cost by then?? Can't Believe It

First of all I feel for you. Secondly I would ingrain from day one in school "Don't count on mummy and daddy to pay for sem in Israel, you are better off building up that downpayment for a house"

amother

Cinnamon

Mon, Mar 04 2024, 7:22 am

amother Almond wrote:

"Nebach, I'm glad I'm not part of a community where women must shave their heads and can't drive. "

Do you see a difference between your statement and mine?

I don't.

Shaving and not driving are not equal. Shaving is a minhag that some do and some don't hold, but it's private and other than Monroe is not enforceable. Driving ok comparable.

But I'm talking about the pressure. I kh have a line of teenage daughters. I'm starting to sweat about the financial stress of marrying them off iyh. I can't imaging having to think of spending 25-30K per kid to send them off to israel because otherwise.......

and then I read on here that people are saving money since they themselves are kids to pay for their daughter's seminary.....

People are struggling, why is this mandatory? It makes no sense.

Bnei Berak 10

Mon, Mar 04 2024, 7:23 am

chestnut wrote:

I think I applied in another thread.
I think the terms come with the contract once accepted. The application just has the amount. If I remember correctly.

Are you telling me you apply and forward a deposit but your don't know the payment terms and conditions in advance? Totally unacceptable. It should be stated right in the beginning.

amother

Cyan

Mon, Mar 04 2024, 7:31 am

I hated my seminary year. I had emotional problems because of my family situation which everyone thought would be helped by getting away but it just made them worse.

I did make a few friends, I keep in touch with one these days, it’s been 6 years since seminary.

My seminary was too frum for me and rather than making me more religiously connected, it just made me angrier.

I thought better of Israel before spending a miserable year there. I’ve heard the same from a few girls who were in seminary with me. And it’s such a pity because my parents went into debt to pay for it. I feel so guilty whenever I think about it.

I wish I could just not send my daughters there someday. At the same time, I remember the pressure of the vast majority of my grade going to seminary in Israel and how left out all the girls who weren’t going felt. It’s a really stupid situation.

chestnut

Mon, Mar 04 2024, 7:40 am

Bnei Berak 10 wrote:

Are you telling me you apply and forward a deposit but your don't know the payment terms and conditions in advance? Totally unacceptable. It should be stated right in the beginning.

You forward a deposit once accepted, not with the application. At the time of applying you only pay an application fee.

little neshamala

Mon, Mar 04 2024, 7:40 am

amother Cyan wrote:

I thought better of Israel before spending a miserable year there. I’ve heard the same from a few girls who were in seminary with me. And it’s such a pity because my parents went into debt to pay for it. I feel so guilty whenever I think about it.

This isnt the first time ive heard this and it make me heartsick.
Completely not ok.

amother

Slateblue

Mon, Mar 04 2024, 7:52 am

amother Eggplant wrote:

I don't remember that vibe specifically, from American Israelis. I just know that I would not want to put my daughters into the environment I was in, and Idk how we as parents can really know for sure.