How do u get kids to talk

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Forum -> Parenting our children -> School age children

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amother

Sun, Sep 10 2006, 11:21 pm

How do get 10-12 to talk, I never know what is going thru his mind. any advice

amother

Mon, Sep 11 2006, 2:28 am

be loving accepting and positive...... and spend quality time with him alone.

abc123

Mon, Sep 11 2006, 3:29 am

Get a hold of the book "How To Talk So Kids Will Listen And Listen So Kids Will Talk". Don't know off the top of my head who wrote it but I think you just might find what you want in there....

Motek

Tue, Sep 12 2006, 12:34 pm

amother wrote:

How do get 10-12 to talk, I never know what is going thru his mind. any advice

Have you been talking to him since he's a baby? It's something that you need to start reaaally early but it's not too late. Amother gave good advice (though can't imagine why it's anonymous).

amother

Tue, Sep 12 2006, 12:55 pm

The problem is its not my kid. The kid is so closed up. I need help getting him to talk, to be open, let me know his feelings

red sea

Tue, Sep 12 2006, 1:04 pm

the surest way to get a kid that age to talk is to tuck them into bed and let them stall by chatting.

another good way to try is to take them out with you to grocery shop or s/t and in the car do not iniate conversation, hold onto to your patience til they start talking. (any joint effort one on one chore usually works)

once they start jabbering away be sure to show interest w/o critisize or judge or a/t like that, hear the "small" stuff that are majorly important to them right now..

the surest way to get a kid to clam up is to ask "how was your day?" unless you only want to hear "fine".

well thats all the ideas I got right now, hth.

red sea

Tue, Sep 12 2006, 1:06 pm

amother wrote:

The problem is its not my kid. The kid is so closed up. I need help getting him to talk, to be open, let me know his feelings

oops didnt see that, in what capacity are you and the kid together?

shoy18

Tue, Sep 12 2006, 1:14 pm

I agree with red sea, take your kid on errands and just chat with him, see if he mentions anything

amother

Tue, Sep 12 2006, 9:55 pm

quote.
the surest way to get a kid to clam up is to ask "how was your day?" unless you only want to hear "fine".

Why is that redsea? I remember as a kid whenever my mom used to ask how was ur day
My response was nothing more than "fine"
I remember her getting fustrated

red sea

Tue, Sep 12 2006, 10:24 pm

amother wrote:

I have no idea but I still do that til today!

Tefila

Tue, Sep 12 2006, 10:27 pm

Red sea I so agree with you Very Happy

Motek

Thu, Sep 14 2006, 10:33 am

amother wrote:

Why is that redsea? I remember as a kid whenever my mom used to ask how was ur day
My response was nothing more than "fine"
I remember her getting fustrated

Well, you were asked how your day was so the answer is either fine or not fine or okay or great. The question is worded in such a way as to elicit those kinds of responses.

TzenaRena

Thu, Sep 14 2006, 10:49 am

We used to ask our son when he came home from kindergarten "What did you learn today?" His answer "Nothing" and then stuck his thumb in his mouth. LOL

The next one didn't have to be asked - he told every story he heard, and everything he learned without being asked. Just a more talkative child altogether.

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