would you take along baby to therapy?

StrawberrySmoothie

Fri, May 20 2011, 11:53 am

amother wrote:

I brought my sleeping newborn to my first therapy session and it totally didnt distract me. It did distract my therapist and she didnt let me bring him again.
I left him with my sister one time and a sitter another time. He didnt take bottles and was always screaming by the time I came back. 2 hrs later.
So I stopped therapy until he's older. If I go somewhere in the day, he comes with. I'm his main food source. Or I go out at night when he's sleeping.

That works if the reason you are going to therapy can be put on hold. It definitely does not work for everyone.

amother

Fri, May 20 2011, 11:59 am

I am starting next week and I am taking my 14 month year old with me. I have no choice I am not paying extra money I don't have it's already costing us alot nor will I find someone I trust to leave her with. Some weeks my DH will be home that is why I chose this time. But it's either this or no therapy and I chose this. And she won't be asleep and would probably be disruptive at times but I Will try. The therapist knows and said it's my choice.

Mama Bear

Fri, May 20 2011, 1:03 pm

This question is for your therapist and her receptionist.

I've been to a local place that has therapists, and always see a stroller or two parked near the receptionist's desk. The receptionist is perfectly fine watching a sleeping baby, and if the baby wakes up, the mother comes to get it. Unless you have a screaming colic baby, and your therapist is okay with it, then it's actually a great idea. The baby can even nurse if needed while youre in the session. Therapy is 45 minutes long; unless you have a very easy way to get your baby to a babysitter, if your therapist or the receptionist are okay with it then go for it.

Mama Bear

Fri, May 20 2011, 1:05 pm

amother wrote:

see - a toddler is a whole other story!!! they dont sit quietly in their strollers for 45 minutes. they wnt to get out, they scream, they run around... you cant concentrate with 14 month old... You'll have to figure out multiple ways ot keep him quiet and distracted - nosh, drink, a toy... etc... Do you have a portable dvd player you can set up in a corner of the room with an uncle moishy video?

flowerpower

Fri, May 20 2011, 1:25 pm

If the newborn is content and quiet after he is fed and all then it should be fine. If he cries a lot and it's a possibility it will happen then then you should consider a sitter. A toddler at a therapist is really a bad idea!

StrawberrySmoothie

Fri, May 20 2011, 1:32 pm

Mama Bear wrote:

Not if you have a male therapist. At least I wouldn't while sitting smack in front of a man who is supposed to be directing all of his attention on me.

amother

Fri, May 20 2011, 1:34 pm

I have a similar problem. I have a 1yr old and a 2 1/2 yr old. I desperatly need therapy (marital) but I have no where to leave the kids and I really dont want the kids with me so Im pushing it off... not very good at all....

Mama Bear

Fri, May 20 2011, 2:43 pm

I wouldnt go to a male therapist in the first place.

to the mother of the 1 1/2 & 2 1/2 yr old: There are therapists who work evening hours, or babysitters you can find the yellowpages.

6yeladim

Sat, May 21 2011, 5:57 pm

I have a friend who has a doctorate in immunology, who has studied breastfeeding and breastmilk extensively. She says that newborn babies experience stress after a short while of not being held by their mothers--they need to be near their food source. This is measured by rising levels of cortisol in their blood. She recommends holding babies nearly constantly for the first few weeks/months. At any rate there is no way to predict when a newborn will next get hungry.
I don't understand how one can be sure that the baby doesn't care.

Bringing the baby to the appointment in a sling is the easiest, as the baby feels safe and secure and the mother can feed as soon as the baby gets restless (instead of waiting until the baby is crying outright).
The mother may concentrate better on the therapist if she is concerned about her baby at home, especially if she doesn't have reliable child care.

In non-western cultures it's considered cruel to separate newborns from their mothers.

mimivan

Sun, May 22 2011, 12:42 am

There was a story about the Lubavitcher Rebbe in which a couple having shalom bayis problems came to him for yechidus with their baby and discussed their problems. I think the Rebbe asked someone to take the baby out of the room briefly and he cautioned them that babies might not seem like it, but they understand everything. . And asked them not to discuss their shalom bayis problems in front of their baby.

Before I had heard this story, I went into counseling with my husband and had no babysitter. The baby was in the room. I noticed he seemed very distressed after our sessions (he was 9 months)...I felt that I had to bring my baby out of necessity, but I think, in retrospect, and given the story above, it should be avoided. Children understand so much more than we think they do...and they understand our energies as babies much more than our words.

amother

Sun, May 22 2011, 1:07 am

I took my new-born nursing baby with me to therapy and nursed her in my (female) therapist's office - totally fine!!!

I think it is harder to NOT bring the baby.

On the other hand, if the baby is fussy, well, that's a whole different ballgame.

amother

Sun, May 22 2011, 2:46 am

I do not have any children but I don't see why people are writing that it's not nice to do to the therapist. Although I think you should ask them I don't think your not bringing them is a matter of it not being fair to the therapist. We paid our therapist 120 dollars an hour so what if there is a baby in the room... I really don't understand.

If the therapist can not concentrate and therefore can not give me the proper therapy I deserve that's another story but still it's not about the therapist it's about my therapy.

I think the big question is A) will you be able to get all you can out of the therapy if the baby is there and B. will you have to give up therapy completely otherwise.

If it was the only way I could see a therapist I would take the baby.

I once had a therapist who would bring her dog to therapy it was so so so annoying as the dog was very distracting and I wanted the therapists attention on me after all I was paying her to see me not a dog!!!

amother

Sun, May 22 2011, 3:07 am

Mama Bear wrote:

Not all therapists have receptionists. My husband goes to someone that practices in his home, so there would be nobody to watch a baby.
Personally I do not think you should take a baby to a therapist. You will not be all there with the therapist if your baby is also there. But thats just my opinion.

shabri

Sun, May 22 2011, 11:46 am

As a therapist, I would not mind a 6 week old at all. Newborns usually sleep or hang out in the stroller. On the other hand, a 14 month old I would not allow (unless it was naptime and she slept in the stroller) I guess at some point between, maybe 9 or 10 mos or so when the baby is no longer content to hang out in the stroller, then it would be a problem.

Yes you are paying me, but you are paying me to give you therapy. If you are occupied with your toddler the whole time then there is no way to get anything accomplished. Its a waste of my time and your and frankly other people want my time. So if you can't be focused on the session, best not to come.

amother

Sun, May 22 2011, 4:38 pm

OP here,

I really appreciate to hear what you all have to say to it. baby is 2 months old. therapist is a female & im trying to schedule time that baby will be fed & should be sleeping, but kids are unpredictable, baby is generally a real good baby bh. I will be traveling at least 1/2 hr without traffic there. if leave by babysitter that means I cant do any errands in that area, which is area I go to a lot for errands & I will be away from baby for close to 3 hrs.
Its a good idea to ask therapist, didnt think of that. I just hope I can take along, I just feel a bit weird about it, like I cant stay away from baby, but I feel the most comfy about it. my kids are my pocketbooks, usually.

Keep your opinions coming. Thanks

chocolate moose

Sun, May 22 2011, 5:38 pm

amother wrote:

I will be traveling at least 1/2 hr without traffic there. if leave by babysitter that means I cant do any errands in that area, which is area I go to a lot for errands & I will be away from baby for close to 3 hrs.

So pump and leave diapers. Most probably you will get your errands done faster without the baby, and isn't it easier to get in and out of stores without a carriage ?

amother

Sun, May 22 2011, 5:41 pm

chocolate moose wrote:

amother wrote:

So pump and leave diapers. Most probably you will get your errands done faster without the baby, and isn't it easier to get in and out of stores without a carriage ?

I would not do errands calmly if I dont have baby with me. am I being too overprotective?

amother

Sun, May 22 2011, 5:59 pm

Absolutely NOT! It would be a waste of your time and the therapist's time as well. You both need full concentration to get the most out of your therapy and his/her advice to you.

Pickle Lady

Sun, May 22 2011, 6:25 pm

I have gone to therapy with therapists that didn't allow to me have my baby with me and ones that didn't mind at all. The one that wouldn't allow my baby to come with me, I dropped after a few sessions because it added stress to my life that I didn't need. I was much less stressed and my kid was fine. I have even take 2 kids with me to therapy. I didn't get as much out of a session as I would have liked if my kids weren't with me but something was better than nothing. I think its totally fine to take a baby with you to the therapist.

Who cares what other people think. Its yours and your therapists decision. Do what works for you.

Simple1

Sun, May 22 2011, 9:23 pm

amother wrote:

Can you find a baby sitter in that area?