stranger danger crashcourse

amother

Sun, Jul 17 2011, 7:31 pm

would anyone know of a place to take kids to be taught safety?
I was outside with m 8 yr old son, he was so oblivious to his surroundings. staring at people, not looking where he was walking.... it realy realy scares me.
why dont they teach these things in school, play games, questions and answers....
with what happened recently, it goes to show, our kids, as street smart as we hope to think they are, I feel a place that teaches safety would be a great benefactor to us parents, as well as our children.

de_goldy

Sun, Jul 17 2011, 7:42 pm

Why can't you teach him?
Also 95% of the time a child who is molested or harmed is targeted by someone he or she already knows. ie not a stranger. So instead of just focusing on "stranger danger" you need to teach about all types of safety.

amother

Sun, Jul 17 2011, 7:52 pm

as much as I teach him, I feel it goes unheard.
safety in general is what I meant.

Merrymom

Sun, Jul 17 2011, 7:59 pm

de_goldy wrote:

Absolutely. You should find out the real statistics. Chances are that a child will get molested by their own relative before any stranger. They need to be taught to turn to women for help and know what is considered improper touching.

amother

Sun, Jul 17 2011, 8:04 pm

I am not talking abot touching, I am rfering to things other than molestation, like chas veshalom gettting lost, abduction, God forbid..

Rubber Ducky

Sun, Jul 17 2011, 8:24 pm

Try role-playing different situations with your child.

Tova

Sun, Jul 17 2011, 8:33 pm

Merrymom wrote:

de_goldy wrote:

I think the advice is specifically to first search out "a woman with a CHILD(ren)."

amother

Sun, Jul 17 2011, 8:50 pm

my feelings towards this is we have a childrens museum, we have a torah museum, where is a safety museum, venishmartem leod lenafshoseichem, a theater with safety dvd, plays of acting out, multiple choice games, whats he doing wrong in this photo and so on, where kids dont realize they're learning, but yet it is being processed.....

Mini Cookie

Sun, Jul 17 2011, 8:51 pm

copied friom mychildsafety.net

Teaching children about "stranger danger".
Stranger danger, are the buzz words commonly used to refer to the important topic of teaching children about the inherent dangers they may face as they venture out into the world.

Unfortunately the world is a scary place and there are people out there who prey on children.

No doubt, it is a very important issue that all parents must address – and one that requires ongoing, open communication with their children.

The single most important thing to remember when teaching your children about stranger danger is to instill confidence, rather than fear.

You want to equip your child with the knowledge and strategies they will need to protect themselves in dangerous situations. Also, keep your child’s age and maturity level in mind and base lessons upon that.

Again, stranger danger lessons should be ongoing – adapt the conversation as your child grows as he/she is likely to encounter different types of situations.

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Who are "strangers"?
First and foremost, children need to understand what you mean by stranger.

Not all people unknown to them are necessarily dangerous – they need to understand the difference between “good” and “bad” strangers; an overly simplistic dichotomy, but one that puts the issue in terms a child can understand.

This is important so children understand where and to whom to turn if they are ever lost or feel scared, threatened, or if they think someone may be following them.

Examples of “good” strangers may include police officers, security guards, teachers, store clerks, etc. These are all examples of people to turn to if when your child needs help.

On the other hand, in many situations where your child may be approached by a “bad” stranger – the park, residential street, etc – those easily identifiable people may not be around.

Your child should know that there really are many more “good” people, than “bad.”

If they are approached by a “bad” stranger who tries to lure or physically pull them away, the best thing they can do is get the attention of other adults - whether that is by running to the nearest home, or making enough noise to be heard by someone, the vast majority of adults will help a child in danger.

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"Stranger Danger", tips and strategies.
Additionally, the following are important tips and strategies for children to protect themselves:

-Know your name, address, and phone number.
-Use the buddy system – avoid walking anywhere alone.
-Trust your instincts – if you feel you are being followed or something is not right, seek help immediately.
-If a stranger approaches you, you do not have to speak to him or her.
-Never approach a stranger in a motor vehicle. Just keep walking.
-Do not accept candy or any other items from a stranger.
-Never walk off with a stranger no matter what he or she tells you.
-If someone is following you try to remember the license plate of his or her vehicle and immediately tell a trusted adult.
-If a stranger grabs you, do everything you can to stop him or her from pulling you away or dragging you into his or her car. Drop to the ground, kick, hit, bite, and scream. Do whatever it takes to attract the attention of others who can help you. If someone is dragging you away, scream, "this is not my dad," or "this is not my mom."

life'sgreat

Sun, Jul 17 2011, 8:55 pm

If he doesn't listen to you, why do you think he'd listen to others? I think this is solely the responsibility of the parent and it isn't the job of the school/camp/etc.. to educate the child on stranger danger.

Mini Cookie

Sun, Jul 17 2011, 8:57 pm

And here are
Stranger Danger Role Playing Scenarios
Use Stranger Danger role playing scenarios with your children to teach them what to do when approached by a stranger. They will benefit the most if you participate in the role playing.
Explain to your children that a stranger is someone you hardly know or do not know at all. People that they see frequently in your neighborhood or community, but do not know, may be just as much a stranger as someone they have never met before or have never seen. In fact, statistics show that most child abductions are committed by individuals known in some way to the child.

The purpose of role playing is to teach your child how to react when approached by a stranger. You should teach your child to seek help from a trusted adult, like a teacher, police officer or a well-known friend's parent anytime they feel scared or threatened by a stranger.

Role play the following encounters and fit the circumstances of your own neighborhood and surroundings:

Children waiting for the bus or a ride home
While waiting for the bus at school, your child is approached by a stranger and says, "Your mother is sick and she asked me to come pick you up and take you home."

Teach your child never to get in a vehicle with someone they don't know or don't know well.
Your child should immediately return to the school and ask the principal or a teacher to use the phone to call you and confirm that you have sent the person to pick them up. Explain that you will never send a stranger to pick them up.
Identify a code word, known only to you and your child. In the event of an emergency in which you would need a friend to pick up your child, teach your child only to go with the friend if he or she knows the code word.

Your child is home alone and the doorbell rings Teach your child to never answer the door when she is home alone. She should ignore the doorbell and avoid looking out windows where she is visible to individuals outside of the house. If the person knocking yells through the closed door that it is an emergency, teach your child to call you or 911, but not to open the door.

Your child is home alone and the phone rings Leave a list of numbers your child should be familiar with, including your cell phone number, work number, grandparent's numbers, etc. Teach your child not to answer the phone if he does not recognize the number and let the call go to voicemail.
If your child does answer the phone and the caller asks to speak with his parents, teach him to never let the caller know he is home alone. Your child should say that you are busy and offer to take a message.

Your child is playing an online game and a player asks for her real name Teach your child to never provide identifying information over the internet, including name, age, or location, even if the person asking is a "friend," they have made online.

Your child is outside riding his bike when a car begins to slowly follow along Teach your child to seek help immediately if he feels like he is being followed. If there is a public place nearby, such as a convenience store or restaurant, he should go in and ask for assistance from an adult who works there. If he is in a residential neighborhood, teach him to go directly home, if close by, or to a friend's house. If he is in an unfamiliar neighborhood teach him to look for a house where it appears someone is home (vehicle in driveway, people in yard, etc), ring the bell and ask for help. Teach your child the difference between a "stranger" who seeks out your child and a "stranger" your child may need to seek out to ask for help. If your child carries a cell phone, teach him to call you as soon as he has sought help from an adult in a safe place. If he has nowhere to turn, teach him to call 911.

Your child is outside playing when a stranger driving by stops his car and asks if she has seen his lost dog (or for directions to the nearby elementary school, or for the time, etc) Teach your child to never go near a stranger's car. Adults do not ask children for help. Your child should immediately walk away and seek help from a trusted adult (as described in scenario above).

Your child is standing outside waiting for you to pick him up. A stranger offers him a ride. He declines, but the stranger attempts to pull him towards the stranger's car. Teach your child to scream "this is not my dad/mom." If your child only fights or screams wordlessly, he may be mistaken by passersby for simply throwing a tantrum. However, if he makes it clear to those around him that the stranger is not his parent, they will be more likely to intervene and help him. Teach your child to do anything they can to avoid being placed in the stranger's car, including screaming, kicking, hitting or biting.

Your child is at the local playground when an unfamiliar adult calls out to her by name. The adult asks her to come over to talk with him. Your child should never be at the park or playground alone. If old enough to be without adult supervision, she should use the buddy system. If your child does not know the adult, she should shake her head no and quickly walk away to a safe place. Teach your child that just because an adult knows her name, it does not mean it is safe to approach the adult. The stranger may have overheard her name being called by others or read it on her clothing, backpack, etc.
In situations like this, safety trumps manners. It is better for your child to risk being "rude" in order to ensure her safety. If it turns out the adult was a friend or acquaintance, they will understand.