coworker went over my head to my boss!!

zipporah

Mon, Jul 18 2011, 1:04 pm

ora_43 wrote:

I agree with previous posters that it's generally considered more professional - and more effective - to bring things up directly with a supervisor. Otherwise 9 times out of 10 the coworker will just get annoyed, and won't change anyway (because "who is he to tell me what to do, he's not the boss" etc).

BUT I think it's very strange that she brought it up with you in front of the boss. Just with the boss and not you would have been professional, just with you and not the boss would have been the friendly thing to do, but both at once is the worst of both worlds - you don't get the chance to fix things without the boss noticing, and she's messing up her relationship with you anyway.

BTW while I agree that it's normal for coworkers to take complaints directly to the supervisor, I do think that in a friendly workplace people usually find a way to mention issues to each other first. Even if there's a rule about going directly to the boss with complaints.

"Friendly" is what it comes down to. Have I ever brought up some problem to a friend instead of the supervisor... no comment Wink

. But there are people (even my friends) who I know don't take criticism well... and I don't have the energy to deal with cow manure in the office. And if I have to tell the same person more than a couple times about the same thing, I'm directing my complaints to an authority figure.

I think I did say, that I found it odd that she spoke to the supervisor with you there... on the other hand, maybe she did speak to the supervisor in private and she was told, it's no big deal... I'll take care of it. And then nothing was done. Now she knows that the boss knows that you know that she knows. For a heimish place, it doesn't sound so friendly... on either side.

Kayza

Tue, Jul 19 2011, 1:03 am

mamommommy wrote:

but to confront you IN FRONT OF your boss is completely out of line, IMO. There was nothing at all to be gained by doing that, except to make herself look good in front of your boss, while still pretending to follow the "heimish" rules of your office.

There is a lot we don't know about the story. Assuming that the OP is correct that the co-worker did this in front of the boss, there may have been a reason for it.

I can think of a few possible scenarios, although without knowing anything about the workplace or the co-worker it's hard to know which, if any, are relevant.