Do you keep or destroy childhood diaries/journals?

amother

Sat, Aug 06 2011, 7:27 pm

I wasn't so frum when I was a teenager and most of my journals are about the latest boy I was interested in dating. But a lot of my journal describes how it was for me to grow up and come to Israel and about Israel years ago, and fun things about tiyulim I have done.
My kids (teens) can read English - what would you do? Not sure I am ready to destroy everything (because of all the good stuff in it) but definately don't want my kids to stumble thru this.

r_ch

Sat, Aug 06 2011, 7:46 pm

Type the best and the most kosher part of it in and save it that way in the computer? It would be such a pity to lose it all, but keep it all is a pity as well. Wink

amother

Sat, Aug 06 2011, 8:34 pm

I destroyed all of mine when I was in high school and discovered that my mom had read them, and then used what she read against me. Never had another one since then.

chocolate fondue

Sat, Aug 06 2011, 9:25 pm

I'm keeping mine for now - to help me remember what it was like to be a teenager. Is there a really safe place where you can keep it?

I still write a diary occassionally, to let out my frustration, but I have less patience to write and I am much more selective about what I record.

6coop

Sat, Aug 06 2011, 9:52 pm

I kept a journal from when when I was in 5th grade until shortly before I got married. I finally got rid of them a few years ago when I realized that there were things written in there that I wouldn't want other people to read, plus the fact that they filled an entire box which was a ridiculous waste of space.

Every once in a while I regret throwing them out because of all of the memories that are now lost. I sort of wish I had gone through them and pulled out some pages to keep, but usually I'm glad that they no longer exist.

amother

Sat, Aug 06 2011, 10:58 pm

After breaking up with a bf I destroyed every shred of anything connected to that relationship from diaries to photos to teddy bears. cathartic, cleansing and smart--no point leaving evidence around of previous relationships to be found by a present love. Before my kids learned how to read I destroyed the diary I kept when dh and I were dating. Neither cathartic nor cleansing,a little painful, in fact, but necessary. Even if they never found it till I was six feet under, some things are just too personal to see the light of day.

Mama Bear

Sat, Aug 06 2011, 11:17 pm

My diaries from 7th grade til 2 yrs after I got married are still intact and hidden in my armoire. I am saving them for the eventual autobiography I plan to write for my children :-D. I had a comprehensive diary I kept about my infertility journey which sadly got lost when the floppy disk I saved it on got corrupted..... (this was in 1999 lol)

zaq

Sat, Aug 06 2011, 11:46 pm

The only diary I didn't shred was the journal of my semester in Israel. It's more of a travelogue than anything else. Impressions, landscapes, adventures. It's a little embarrassing to read some of the overblown prose my 17-year-old self was fond of, and there are a few experiences that would make my mother faint (mountain climbing sans safety equipment, e.g.), but nothing that would raise any eyebrows. But, then, it was written with the idea that it would be read by others.

Alef Bais

Sat, Aug 06 2011, 11:51 pm

OMG, I have every single one still!!! They fill up an entire drawer. I'm still not sure if I should keep or destroy them. There are some things in there that I would love to save, whereas others I most definitely want to forget. I dream of typing up the most meaningful entries one day so I can throw out the hard copy, but we'll see if I ever get to it.

leomom

Sun, Aug 07 2011, 12:25 am

I still have mine in a box, but I must do something about them soon.

OP, can you cut out the GOOD stuff and paste them into a new notebook, kind of like a scrapbook of the things you do want to remember and wouldn't mind other people reading (if it came to that)?

I think that's less tantalizing (and less seemingly incriminating) to other people than a journal with parts missing!

zaq

Sun, Aug 07 2011, 12:31 am

PSA: If you still have your diaries, go thru them right now and imagine that your dh, dc, mil or a total stranger is reading them, now or after your demise. Obliterate anything you wouldn't want any of them to be privy to. No matter how well you think something is hidden, someone will find it eventually, even if it's only after you're gone. People have been devastated and families torn apart by things that were revealed in diaries. This is not to say that I think anyone here has anything all that juicy in her diary, ch"v, but even if all it is is some heated teenage mooning over someone who is not your dh, do you really want your dh to see that? If it's graphic descriptions of your physical reactions to dh while you were dating, or an admission that you stole a candy bar when you were eight, do you want your dc to see that?

Babysitters also snoop, btw.

zaq

Sun, Aug 07 2011, 12:36 am

chocolate fondue wrote:

I'm keeping mine for now - to help me remember what it was like to be a teenager. Is there a really safe place where you can keep it?

Only in your head. Not even a bank safe deposit box is entirely safe. bank thieves wouldn't bother stealing your diary, but they wouldn't bother putting it back in the box, either.

amother

Sun, Aug 07 2011, 3:28 am

op here. Thanks for all the suggestions, from typing parts up to putting in a safe box (my dh's suggestion also). I think though as someone said 'some things are too personal to see the light of day' - and that holds true of some of the things I wrote about - I actually can't beleive that 90% of my time was spent fantasizing about the next boyfriend....oiy! Even in a safe box someone will have to read it eventually (like when I am dead!).
Its just sad to destroy my handwriting and my doodles etc but I think its probably safer.
EEk to the person who said babysitters snoop - Gosh I hope not! I didnt do that when I babysat - but maybe coz I knew the pain of having your diary read. My 'friend' read mine when I was a teen and it was very ahrd to get over.

willow

Sun, Aug 07 2011, 5:15 am

I have an entire container full of journals in my closet my dh would never read them even though most are from when we got married!!

Merrymom

Sun, Aug 07 2011, 12:54 pm

I have mine from when I was an older teen. The one that I don't have that I'm really sorry for getting rid of was the one from when I was about ten years old. Every entry went something like this:

"I hate Mrs. S., she sent me out of class today"
"Mrs. S. punished me today, I HATE her"
"I hate Mrs S., she sent me to the principal today"
"Mrs. S. hates me and I HATE HER!!!"

You get the picture.

amother

Sun, Aug 07 2011, 1:08 pm

Merrymom, so funny! Mine--I got a diary for a b-day gift in about Grade 2 or 3--went like this:

Today was my bday. I got this diary, a white sweater and a Chatty Cathy doll. I got to eat the cookie that said Happy Birthday.

Got $5 chanuka gelt from Uncle Moe.

Got 100 on my spelling test.

Found my wallet that was missing since Chanuka.

Went to Rivka's birthday party.

But my favorite entry, which accounts for roughly 3/4 of the book, was "nothing happened." shortened after a while to NH. I thought you had to write something on every page, so if I couldn't think what to write, that was the default.

I destroyed that one, not because it was blackmail material, but because it was so boring!

zaq

Sun, Aug 07 2011, 1:15 pm

That Merrymom kid is driving me insane. The child is bright but hardheaded and stubborn is putting it mildly. I had to send her out of class.

Merrymom again. Incredibly chutzpadik. had to punish her lest the whole class follow in her footsteps.

Merrymom gets worse and worse, Expulsion from class does no good. had to call in big guns and send her to principal.

Please G-d find Merrymom's Dad a job in Kalamazoo and get her OUT OF MY CLASS!!!! Fervently, Mrs. S.

Merrymom

Sun, Aug 07 2011, 2:00 pm

zaq wrote:

You have no idea, the janitor and I were best friends, and that is a very honest statement.

ray family

Sun, Aug 07 2011, 2:45 pm

I have a few journals left from before I got married. I should seriously tear out the pages about my ex bec. my husband doesnt know about him and would NOT be happy.

when I was in therapy my therapist would record all of our sessions for me to listen over. right after I got married I dumped them bec. I didnt want my new husband to come across them. a part of me really regrets doing that as I would love to have the option of listening to them. on the flip side the thought of my husband hearing them (still) is too much.