No-meds approach to ADHD

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Forum -> Parenting our children -> School age children

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amother

Wed, Aug 10 2011, 5:05 pm

I am looking for anyone that has a child with ADHD that does not give meds. I am trying to figure out what I can do to help my ds and dd naturally.

If anyone has tried anything that has worked first hand only!! Please let me know. Also if anyone has gone to a naturepath or nutritionist that has helped please let me know as well. Again I am looking only for first hand experience!

Thank you so much.

If anyone would like I can post what I have tried as well that worked. I have done numerous things which have helped some more, some less but I need more ideas and direction. Thank you all!

MaBelleVie

Wed, Aug 10 2011, 5:18 pm

If you want to avoid medication, I would recommend getting ongoing guidance from a mental health professional as to how you can best parent your child, in addition to teaching your child how to develop the skills that are missing. Therapy is highly effective.

tikva18

Wed, Aug 10 2011, 5:25 pm

We don't have ADHD here, but other issues.

What have you tried? We do not medicate here. I'll be happy to try to help, if I am able.

Happy18

Wed, Aug 10 2011, 7:54 pm

I used to teach special ed most of the kids had adhd and several chose not to medicate. I would suggest if you speak to a behaviorist. The behaviorist I've met and worked with really help the kids and the parents.

amother

Wed, Aug 10 2011, 8:11 pm

my son is 4, so he is really too young for anyone to be comfortable recommending meds, and we are very anti anyway. I tried (myself, without my husband) parenting classes, but they didnt really help because they were geared towards typical children, which my son is not.
we (my husband and I together) are taking a one on one parent training course. it is a very specific behavior program, and it is supposed ot be able to carry over even when you are donw with the classes. its an 8-10 week program, and they teach you different methods and language to use. so far we have seen a lot of change, for the better.
I would also like to try to get him some play therapy, but I had a hard time finding out if my insurance covers it.
I tried a few different diet changes, and none of them made a significant enough change for it to be worth it.
we may consider medication down the road, but for now it is not even a topic up for discussion.

amother

Wed, Aug 10 2011, 9:13 pm

I resisted giving my son mess for years until I read the Mayo Clinic Report that says child with adhd who are not medicated are much more likely to become drug addicts. I resisted drugs because I was afraid they would have opposite effect than they do. I now give the medication.

Prior to giving the meds, I used to give my son coffee, chocolate and cola. It has the opposite effect than on my other children and actually relaxed him. Ds would be so calm. I wanted to give him iv coffee.

Dh is the better parent. He set string boundaries and give very strick consequences for bad behavior. I also did not stand for the tantrums; but I can't stand to see my child suffer for condition which Hashem gave. It is not his fault things are so hard. It reached the point where I had to call dh at work to have him tell ds to get ready for school.

Ds got thrown out of schools and programs. They wanted to send him to a special school. It affected his learning. Now he is a top student who does not need counseling to cope. Good luck with this. I wish you every success. It is not easy what you are trying to do.

amother

Wed, Aug 10 2011, 9:40 pm

I resisted giving meds not mess for years. Sorry

flowerpower

Wed, Aug 10 2011, 9:42 pm

There is this feingold diet-I think that is the name that is supposed to help kids with adhd.

marina

Wed, Aug 10 2011, 9:48 pm

There are a few behavioral approaches you can try, but we need to know more about your son OP.

I was a little confused with all the amothers here. Is the OP's son the four year old? If not, how old is he? How severe is the ADHD? What are the behaviors you are seeking to change? Does he go to pre-school? How is he there? What have you tried specifically that has worked? What works as a reward for him- what does he like? What does not work so far? How long can he sit and look at a age-appropriate book for?

amother

Thu, Aug 11 2011, 11:58 am

OP here, my son is 6 we use incentives, charts, let him get his energy out playing sports, he is also hyper sensory so I let him touch whatever he needs to ie. in the winter every peice of snow, leaves, making challah, playing with playdo, mushing up chop meat, playing with water. I have also done massage therapy with him, different messy projects which he loves.

The issue is that he gets fustrated easily and then makes a huge mess, or will try to get away with whatever he can to see how far he can push someone's buttons.

He does enjoy the things I mentioned above but it's very hard to focus only on DS when I also have 2 other kids, a dd who gets anxious alot and another dd who is also adhd like but is less physical. My ds will fight with other kids, he has come home bruised and without his yalmuka on many occassons.

I am also looking into finding a naturepath the problem with that is that they don't take insurance and it's hard to find one that is not just a bunch of hype. I have someone in mind but it's $170 for the first visit and then $70 each additional. If I have no choice I will do it unless someone here knows of someone cheaper. I also heard of the d'adamo institute but that's $350 and all the way out in New Hampshire.

Please keep the information coming. Thank you so much!

tikva18

Thu, Aug 11 2011, 1:36 pm

If you are interested in looking into diet - as someone suggested above- then I would suggest sitting down with your ds and talking to him about how foods make him feel. Have him think about how he feels after eating different foods and let him tell you. Do they make him happy, sad, angry, mad, excited, slow, etc.

A great book to read is by Dr. Doris Rapp - http://www.amazon.com/This-You.....19077

Removing the foods that make him feel bad will make a world of difference. This is the theory behind the Feingold diet.

If you are looking at supplementing: get his vitamin D3 checked - if his levels are low (latest recommendations are it should be between 80-100), then D3 should be added. (D3 is more easily absorbed than D2.) Omega 3s are important for good healthy brain function. A good B complex - will help even out moods.

marina

Sat, Aug 13 2011, 11:39 pm

amother wrote:

What happens when you tell him to clean up? Or impose a consequence? Why does he come come bruised? What does he do when with other children? The more details we have, the more we can help.

scheins

Sat, Aug 13 2011, 11:58 pm

I have a son that was diagnoised with ADHD. I went to a kenetist (sp?) locally she charged me only $100 for the first visit and any follow up visits are much cheaper depending on the time. She gave me vitamins for my son to take and foods that he should avoid. when he is on the food plan (as I call it) and he takes his vitamins he acts like he should if he would be on the meds. we did do meds for a year so I have what to compare to. the problem is that he is 6 turning 7 and it is hard for him not to be able to eat the forbiden food (most of which contain sugar.) if you want you can contact me for more info.

amother

Sun, Aug 14 2011, 2:11 am

I have a 10 year old ADHD
I refuse to give medication

It has been very difficult but b'h we switched him schools at the beginning of this year and he is doing great in the new school. It's a very small place that understands chanoch lnaar al pi darcho and not be like everyone else.
It's been a lifesaver.

It is hard and takes a lot more patience when he is home but I have learned there are things that I have to ignore and slowly he is growing and maturing (though less mature then most kids his age)

I tried different therapies but didn't see much success in them.

I do give him omega 3 daily though I'm not sure if it really makes a difference

amother

Sun, Aug 14 2011, 2:28 am

I have a dd with some similar issues. Some common sense tips:
-lots of structure. make a wall chart for the morning routine, one for the evening routine. Or a whiteboard that you write it out, and cross it out.
-Set up some clear rules, and consequences, keep it very simple but keep to it.
-Use assertive language, not aggresive not passive. Say "you will do x a nd then x will happen" Or if x then x" in a calm voice. No " please could you do x" of "You need to do x" or "you better do x" or "Why don't you ..."
-Make sure when you talk to him it is to his face, not calling to him from across the room.
(I am not sure what to say about him getting in fights and coming home hurt etc. where is that happening- he needs to be supervised! And if he is not behaving with other kids he can get one warning then that's it, he is removed from the group, this must be clear)
-physical activity, sign him up for gymnastics, karate or another sports activity, one where there is structure and rules of safety is good. A couple times a week is best, he needs to feel good at something and get some physical energy out in a productive way
-Food- I am not sure of all the diets, but can you cut out artificial colorings and flavorings, and sugar, and just have him eat more healthy meals? Emphasize the fruits and veggies etc.
-Sleep- a proper sleep routine and enough sleep has been studied to make a significant impact
-self-regularing/calming activities throughout the day, find activities that he can do that are calming for him, both independant and with you or another adult. Some kids love pretend play, or lego, or clicks, or reading new library books, or puzzles etc. (screen time should be used very very sparingly for this kind of kid btw, but I think it's ok as part of a routine as a reward for a very limited amount of time) have these activities be built in as part of his day. For example, he get's up what does he do first- coloring that's set up? His special lego?
-talk to him, collaborate on ideas on how to solve problems that come up, listen to him and his opinions, and show that you care what he says, don't always have a preconcieved notion of the correct solution, be open to coming up with one together. AKA collaborative problem solving, read "The Explosive Child" for info. on this. It doesn't preclude any other approaches, it is just an overall outlook.
-Once you have worked on all these, trying vitamins or complicated diets doesn't hurt but to me those are secondary to all these.

anonymrs

Sun, Aug 14 2011, 4:19 am

Read the book "Raising Your Spirited Child." It will train you how to discipline your child in the way that is most effective for this type of kid (I am talking from experience-this book has been a huge lifesaver!)

amother

Forestgreen

Thu, Sep 05 2019, 1:29 pm

amother wrote:

we (my husband and I together) are taking a one on one parent training course. it is a very specific behavior program, and it is supposed ot be able to carry over even when you are donw with the classes. its an 8-10 week program, and they teach you different methods and language to use. so far we have seen a lot of change, for the better.

Can u elaborate please! Where did you go

amother

Amethyst

Thu, Sep 05 2019, 1:57 pm

amother wrote:

I resisted giving my son mess for years until I read the Mayo Clinic Report that says child with adhd who are not medicated are much more likely to become drug addicts.

Giving your child drugs gives your child a 100% chance of being on drugs. Drugs are harmful whether you're addicted or not.

groovy1224

Thu, Sep 05 2019, 2:00 pm

amother [ Forestgreen ] wrote:

Can u elaborate please! Where did you go

Wherever she went, she did it 8 years ago

amother

Periwinkle

Thu, Sep 05 2019, 2:19 pm

I love Susy Parker's story and outlook. https://linktr.ee/susy_parker[quote]

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