what did he want to say?!

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Forum -> Relationships -> Manners & Etiquette

What did he want to say?!

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amother

Thu, Sep 22 2011, 9:11 am

yesterday as I was walking down the street I was crying a little (something that happened in the morning made me remember something). anyway I did not thinking I was crying visibly at all, just a little, but obviously it was noticeable and as I was walking down the road this man in a restaurant - couldn't tell whether he was working there or a customer, called out to me "why are you crying?" I think he was Israeli (I don't live in Israel though), because then he said "boi!" "boi!" (come!) I didn't acknowledge this man at all because as I said I was not even aware that I was crying that much, and I was kind of in my own world and just walked passed. what do you think he wanted to do/say?

amother

Thu, Sep 22 2011, 9:41 am

I don't know what he wanted to say, but I am glad you walked past. saying that I think he meant well I think he wanted to just convey "hey, hey, don't cry, it can't be that bad". it was none of his business to know why, but he is a man, and men often feel helpless and overwhelmed when they see a female crying, especially a young lady. a lot of men were wrongfully told by their parents "boys don't cry" so they bottle up emotions and they have problems dealing with seeing someone cry unless they have a lot of sisters, and it doesn't mean you're hysterical but the fact is girls and women are more likely to cry often when they feel upset. so don't read anything bad into what he said. and sometimes it does help to cry, and to talk about this memory that is upsetting you and get it off your chest - it helps to have an outlet.

I hope you are feeling happier today Smile

amother

Thu, Sep 22 2011, 10:00 am

he might have been thinking he could try and calm you and maybe at the same time chat you up
he didn't make it very inviting lol "come" - what are you a dog? lol
maybe I am cynical because I know men can be dogs lol OK Hug

StrongIma

Thu, Sep 22 2011, 10:14 am

I think he was being nice and trying to help a fellow Jew - why are you reading so much into this?

flowerpower

Thu, Sep 22 2011, 10:33 am

He probably wanted to calm you down a bit. Hope todays a better day for you.

amother

Thu, Sep 22 2011, 10:37 am

I always put on sunglasses if I tear up outside. Just a little tip.

zaq

Thu, Sep 22 2011, 11:48 am

StrongIma wrote:

I think he was being nice and trying to help a fellow Jew - why are you reading so much into this?

It could go either way--he could have been a knight in shining armor racing to rescue a damsel in distress for the sheer rightness of it; a man who can't stand to see a woman--any woman--cry; or a Lothario hoping to use your distress and distraction to forward his own nefarious agenda.

You ignored him, as was proper, case closed. Why are you brooding about it and trying to figure out what he meant? What difference does it make?

amother

Thu, Sep 22 2011, 1:47 pm

I definitely would have ignored him as you did but I dunno would have been interesting to see. maybe he would have cheered you up a bit. prob he wanted to buy you an icecream or something nice! who knows maybe you would have felt better after "meeting" with him

feel better!!!!

zaq

Thu, Sep 22 2011, 2:03 pm

amother,amother,amother with the ice cream...didn't your mother ever tell you never to take candy from strangers? It's as true at 26 as it is at 6, and it doesn't have to be candy. and what on earth do you mean by "meeting" in quotation marks?

marshmellow

Thu, Sep 22 2011, 2:52 pm

He wanted to know if there was any way he could help you.

Dolly Welsh

Thu, Sep 22 2011, 3:36 pm

What Zaq said.

amother

Thu, Sep 22 2011, 3:47 pm

he wanted you to come over and sit down so you could talk, and maybe you would feel better after talking.

Chocoholic

Thu, Sep 22 2011, 6:53 pm

I think he just wanted to sooth you, make you feel better and for you to stop being sad and stop crying.

I think you are looking way too deep into it.

Of course, there are those that want to "prektiz english in mai kar" but you can spot them very easily.

Relax, breath in, breath out, get used to the Israeli nosinesess and lack of american "tact".

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