am I weird? why didn't I think of that?

amother

Tue, Dec 13 2011, 10:33 am

DH wants to buy me a present for my birthday and I was asking for suggestions. My ideas were a publication, a food processor, new set of towels, a bread machine, a new robe etc. I don't need jewelry so I decided to skip that idea.
My sisters were laughing at me- they said that a gift is something that a)you wouldn't otherwise buy yourself b)doesn't give you more jobs or projects I.e. a bread machine. They asked me why a magazine would be a gift, why don't you pick up the phone and order a subscription? You know what I have no idea!!!!! We can afford it but I don't need it so every once in a while it was a treat. But why? I really enjoy it and it would be a nice thing to look forward to shabbos, why do I need to make a present out of it? probably because Dh thinks it's a waste of money since it's a one time thing and then gets thrown out.
They voted jewelry because, it's something you never need and it's a real treat. The other things you budget for if you need it or save if you want it.

Now I feel dumb having discussed with my DH getting the magazine as a present, kind of like I wasted a gift, because there is no need for it to be a present, I should get a REAL present. What do you consider gifts?

Excuse me if this sounds ridiculous - I'm pretty hormonal.

imasinger

Tue, Dec 13 2011, 10:44 am

I ask for what I want or need. Which often is nothing, and sometimes is something practical.

I think they're all good, and people shouldn't criticize what you asked for. IMO, you didn't do anything wrong, and your sisters are giving you a hard time when they should be supportive.

For me and DH, even if we could order it for ourselves, there is something special about someone having done it for you because they love you.

There are times when people even will go out and buy and wrap a gift that they want and then give it to their spouse to give to them. If it's done with humor and love, everyone can feel good about it.

Della

Tue, Dec 13 2011, 10:48 am

I personally think your magazine subscription is a good idea. That way, every week when it arrives you can think, "My DH bought this for me!"

My kids and DH bought me (at my request) a Bosch for Channukah years ago. I love it!!!!

I think there is no right or wrong. Whatever will make you happy, think of DH, is perfect.

BH you have such a thoughtful husband. Enjoy! and Happy Birthday!!

chocolate chips

Tue, Dec 13 2011, 12:24 pm

If you sisters like jewelry for a gift then they can get that. I think subsricption is great because its a gift every week! A bread machine also because its a loaf of bread/a gift used every day!

I also like to get something that I will use often for a present. Even if I could get it myself because I really want it, why double the money? A present that is needed is a real present!

MGmom

Tue, Dec 13 2011, 12:34 pm

Each to its own. I once needed a new set of dishes.. well twas a family gift but I wanted it then and even if I cudve gotten it myself twas sumthing special getting it from dh. as pp said even when we need sumthing small and cud get it ourself it had a special meaning when we get it for each other in gift wrap no matter what it is. So here another cute one. We needed all toothbrushes replaced. Dh got me n kids electric toothbrushes and waterpic. Twas really sweet of him and just about anything can go into gift wrap!

seeker

Tue, Dec 13 2011, 12:34 pm

Magazine subscription definitely sounds like it would be a good gift for you. It's something you like and enjoy but consider a bit of a splurge. Frankly your sister's take on it sounds a little spoiled.

Bread machine/food processor - depends. If it would make you happy and you would enjoy making different bread recipes with it or whatever (I don't even know what you do with a bread machine. But that's me) so sure, why not? But if it would be like "Here's a bread machine dear, can you make me some bread now? and every day?" Then maybe not so much. But if it would make your life easier and you wouldn't get one otherwise, then it seems like a great idea, too.

I think gifts are a personal choice and your sisters should mix out. Instead of telling you you wasted a gift, they should help you appreciate whatever your DH gets for you.

(frankly, I got my DH underwear for Chanukah. Not special ones, just fresh new boxers. But my family includes people with widely varied standards of living and we respect that.)

Barbara

Tue, Dec 13 2011, 12:56 pm

amother wrote:

I think its a good thing that your DH asked you want you wanted instead of asking your sisters. This way, you'll be getting something that you'll enjoy and appreciate, rather than something that you'll feel obligated to wear even though you didn't want or need it.

To someone who doesn't like to cook, a food processor is a terrible gift. To someone who loves it, it could be great.

You asked for things that will make YOU happy, that YOU want and enjoy. Don't worry about what anyone else thinks of them.