Nechemya Weberman charged with abusing 12 yr old girl

chani8

Wed, May 16 2012, 10:49 am

I agree with you totally, Barbara.

But I am still for freedom of speech.

And I believe that once people put their thoughts out into the light, they will see the problem with their thinking.

Especially on imamother, when we have people like you who will set them straight.

And hopefully this young lady and her family are not on this site, or if they are, they get more chizzuk from those who are defending them (rather than feeling more betrayed).

sarahd

Wed, May 16 2012, 11:19 am

TranquilityAndPeace wrote:

Chloe wrote:

I live in Williamsburg. You all know that I'm a realistic open-minded person (you can read my posts) and I am outspoken against child molesters. However, in this case, if you would know the girl you would not be so easily influenced by the media (the worst place from where to gain accurate insights with all their hype and distortions).

I know this girl personally. I do not want to take sides, or speak loshon horah because of course I wasn't there when she was having her session with him, but I can tell you that it is extremely easy to accuse a man nowadays and I believe that this is the case here from the INSIDE STORY that I personally know.

Okay, so I got a report about this post saying:

Quote:

Complete and utter lashon hara, with poster claiming that a girl fabricated abuse allegati

Seems to me that either way is lashon hara (or hotzoas shem ra) - whether you accuse the alleged perpetrator or the alleged victim. One thing is certain - anyone reading this thread is reading both lashon hara and hotzoas shem ra, but we don't know which applies to whom. It might not be a bad idea to refrain from saying anything about both sides, since we are neither judge nor jury here.

Hashem_Yaazor

Wed, May 16 2012, 11:37 am

sarahd wrote:

TranquilityAndPeace wrote:

Chloe wrote:

Okay, so I got a report about this post saying:

Quote:

Complete and utter lashon hara, with poster claiming that a girl fabricated abuse allegati

I completely agree.

The only thing allowed to be done is take precaution, not accept anything as absolute truth, when there is toeles involved.

marina

Wed, May 16 2012, 12:10 pm

I'm not clear on how discussing this is not letoeles. The person, if guilty, is clearly a danger to the community. Is he still providing "therapy" to children?

Also, I totally agree that we need to raise money for arrested criminals who have not yet had their day in court. For example, I went door to door raising money for Lemrick Nelson, Yankel Rosenbaum's alleged murderer. And boruch hashem, he was proven innocent at trial. Because my fundraising got him a great attorney. Remember, in America, people accused of a heinous crime are still innocent until proven guilty, and there's probably no better cause that my money can go to than raising money for their defense.

chani8

Wed, May 16 2012, 12:37 pm

yiddishekup wrote:

Oh thanks, I was almost going to google whether Lemrick Nelson went free...

I googled it. He went free. He was later stabbed and left in a coma from a road rage incident. I am unclear as to whether or not he is still alive.

I agree that there is a toeles to discuss this case from the point of view of how the community is handling it, and whether or not it is correct to fund raise, and to put posters up, and to post on forums supporting an accused suspected purpetrator in a way that makes a child look like a liar.

It does seem to me that the few lines in some posts that imply personal knowledge that the girl is a liar should be removed. As well, if anyone stated that they personally knew that the rapist weberman was a dangerous snake, that should probably be removed as well. Wink

ora_43

Wed, May 16 2012, 1:30 pm

marina wrote:

Also, I totally agree that we need to raise money for arrested criminals who have not yet had their day in court. For example, I went door to door raising money for Lemrick Nelson, Yankel Rosenbaum's alleged murderer. And boruch hashem, he was proven innocent at trial. Because my fundraising got him a great attorney. Remember, in America, people accused of a heinous crime are still innocent until proven guilty, and there's probably no better cause that my money can go to than raising money for their defense.

I don't think we need to raise money for them. I think it's normal that their friends and family will try to do so. Two very different things.

Chloe

Wed, May 16 2012, 2:02 pm

StrawberrySmoothie wrote:

The way some posters are defending him makes me believe the story more. The lines are the same lines used over and over.

I guess y'all are proving the NYT and WSJ correct... what a shame and huge chillul Hashem.

I'm assuming you're not directing this comment at me. I made it clear from the beginning that I am not taking sides and that I honestly don't know what happened. I just know some inside information so I'm asking people to be cautious when jumping to conclusions.

Orchid

Wed, May 16 2012, 2:06 pm

marina wrote:

If this situation wasn't so sad, that would be funny.

Sick world we frummies live in.... in our olam hasheker, the victim is the aggressor and the aggressor is the victim. May the truth be revealed and may our children be protected.

Tzutzie

Wed, May 16 2012, 2:07 pm

Chanala1 wrote:

cant she be examined by a doctor to check if it was done?

no. she could have an active S life w/her boy friend. donno.

well, you never know what happened but here are a few facts.

I know both ppl. Her better than Him.

She was my first cousins closest friend in elementary school when she stil attended satmar school. My very openminded and couldn't care less aunt had my cousin seperated from her cuz she came home w/crazy ideas from her.

she was only accepted into munkatch school after lost of 'pretektzia' and a huge donation and promises from someone else (I'm not sure if it is somone else who takes care of at risk teens or a differnet asken) they did NOT want to accept her. not at first and not later. but money talks.... - this I did not hear now, I remeber when this was happening. how my cousin told me that she doesn't have a school and that a family member who knew her family (didn't know her sister then) said the above.
Mr. weberman is an upstanding respected, erlicha man. he has helped many ppl and no one expect for her complained.

her family, is horrified and are ashamed to show their face in the streets! I know her sister PERSONALLY.

the above I know as facts.

the below I heard...

this is what I heard - She had a stalker she couldn't get loose, so she went to weberman to complain and made a restraining order on him. later on, she changed her mind and wanted him as a bf, he, her then bf, wanted to get back at him (weberman) so this whole scandal came out of it.

take whatever you want from this post. but DON'T change it to fit your veiws and opinions on the issue.

happy arguing.

Mama Bear

Wed, May 16 2012, 2:09 pm

1. There is nothingn wrong with raising funds for a person who needs an attorney.
2. There is something wrong with turning into a big event. I get that they turned it into a big event bc they wanted to attract more $$$. Which is going to the attorneys, not to the fundraisers.
3. It is wrong to jump to ANY CONCLUSIONS. Conclusions that the molestation did occur, conclusions that the molestation didnt occur. WE DONT KNOW. We dont know the facts, we havent seen evidence.

Barbara

Wed, May 16 2012, 2:21 pm

Yael wrote:

Barbara wrote:

Why is it OK for people to make posts impugning the accuser, stating that they have "inside information," and that she is, for all intents and purposes, a liar.

its not ok at all. thats why I wrote not to make judgments about whether her story is true or not. The police are involved, and the man is going on trial.
May the US justice system prevail.

But there's still plenty of nasty things being posted about this young woman. I don't see any halachic or moral justification for it.

Barbara

Wed, May 16 2012, 2:25 pm

Tzutzie wrote:

Chanala1 wrote:

cant she be examined by a doctor to check if it was done?

So you don't mind if I daven tonight that whatever happened to this girl at the hands of this man should also happen to your daughters?

And, in fact, if he's out on bail, why not send your daughter on a lovely trip, all alone, with the guy. No worries.

Because you were in the room, watching, and know that he didn't abuse her.

Unless you were in the room you don't have any more clue than I do. But you're nevertheless willing to drag this poor girl through the mud.

This is beyond disgusting.

Support him if you deem appropriate. But keep your thoughts on that girl to yourself.

Barbara

Wed, May 16 2012, 2:28 pm

Mama Bear wrote:

IMNSHO, the problem wasn't turning it into an event. That's how you raise money.

The problem was turning it into an attack on the girl. Depicting her as a missile attacking the community because she dared to mention abuse (to a mandated reporter). *That's* what's wrong. Not voicing support for him.

myself

Wed, May 16 2012, 2:31 pm

I agree with the others that there is no point discussing any specifics since NONE of us know BOTH sides of the story. Unless you were a fly on the wall there is no way you can know what transpired. I don't know why this whole thing had to go so public but it definitely helps to bring more awareness. Protect your children and look out for red flags. That's all we can do, and I think that's the only thing we should be taking away from this at this point!