Relocating | Imamother

amother

Mon, Jan 08 2007, 7:59 pm

anyone here ever relocate or move out of town? Was it something you and your dh always wanted or did one of you have to convince the other party? what made you decide? how long from when you first had the idea until it happened?

was it hard leaving everyone behind? are you glad you made the decision?

ceo

Mon, Jan 08 2007, 8:06 pm

Yes, I did.

I am very glad. I think that there a lot of places out of NY that have a lot to offer. Not all places outside of NY are cheap, by any means, but there are bargains to be found. Also, in general, the quality of life in other ways, can be wonderful. Also, in general, in smaller, more conservative cities, I belive that the environment is better for encouraging derech eretz and middos tovos.

It really depends where you live. Certain cities are probably very similar to NY (My guess is that there are plenty of NYers in L.A. and Miami), while other places are definetly have a slower paced atmosphere (probably Cleveland, pittsburgh, Atlanta, Denver).

I think that it's hard to group all "out of town" into one lump, every city is different.

And yes, there are some great schools out of town! Again, depends on the city.

hatzlacha. pm me if you want more specifics.

amother

Mon, Jan 08 2007, 8:47 pm

I'm looking to move to a small town from ny. I'm so sick of it here already. we can't afford anything!

dh is scared to make the move yet, but my children are under 2 so I think the sooner the better.

if our lease is up in 15 months, how soon do you think we should start looking into home buying and jobs OOT?

ceo

Mon, Jan 08 2007, 9:16 pm

amother wrote:

Absolutely, the sooner the better. In terms of how far in advance, first you have to pick a place you want to live!!! What are your fields? Again, you can't lump all "OOT" into one category. When you say small town, what do you mean by that? What type of place are you looking to move to? How far away from NY? Also, if you are looking for less expensive, that will cross certain cities off your list in a jiffy.

Also, when you're looking at costs, it's not just housing, but also other costs of living: utilities, insurance, food (regular and kosher), etc....

greenfire

Tue, Jan 09 2007, 7:50 am

When we did it - it was torture to find a job oot - it's way easier to look for job on a visit etc. - Do you know where you're looking - One could by a house in Cleveland for about $124,000 with a mortgage that is usually lower than a NY rent.

However, I do miss my family, but got used to less hecticness and visit NY often. I moved about 2 1/2 years after I promised though (after wedding vs. after 2 kids) we needed a bigger place and so we just moved out of town.

chocolate moose

Tue, Jan 09 2007, 7:57 am

One big reason we didn't go out of town, is that we have good jobs in NYC, with NYC salaries. If you live OOT, you'll make less. Some of your expenses will stay the same however - wedding expenses, tuition (high school/seminary). Andkosher food may or may not be more.

I coudl not justify making half or a third as much, yet paying maybe more for kosher food and certainlya NYC level price for weddings and education!~

DefyGravity

Tue, Jan 09 2007, 8:04 am

While you may make a little less at a comparable job, housing is generally cheaper OOT. Salaries in different parts of the country generally go according to the price of living.

My husband was able to buy a house with his out of town salary a year before we were married. Even if he made a comparable NYC salary (which probably wouldn't be very different than his current salary), he wouldn't have been able to buy a house in NYC. Even with our combined income (my salary is a NYC salary), we wouldn't be able to purchase a house in NYC.

It's not like people that work in NYC are really rolling in the dough for doing the same job that someone in St. Louis may be doing. It might be slightly higher, but it's not going to make such a big difference b/c living in NYC is super-expensive.

greenfire

Tue, Jan 09 2007, 8:09 am

Yes oot I know the prices of shampoo and deoderant are cheaper than NY - kosher food is expensive anywhere - and you get to relax in a backyard - which they do not have in NY not without $500,000 oh and your blood pressure goes down from not fighting for a parking space or moving car for alternate sides - it's meshuga

ceo

Tue, Jan 09 2007, 8:10 am

chocolate moose wrote:

I think that Chocolate Moose is over-simplifying salaries and OOT living. I am not saying that she is wrong, but you cannot just lump everything together. Your salary and cost of living quotient will be much different in Chicago than in Cleveland.

To the OP, first, you have to pick a few places that you are interested in living in, and investigate from there.

chocolate moose

Tue, Jan 09 2007, 8:12 am

I grew up outside of Washington DC. I would make 1/3 the money for the same job. I checked it out; my parents would have LOVED for us to have lived near them; it just wasn't financially possible!

We would have needed two cars (in NYC we need NONE). There would have been carpool isue for chincuch for the kids, and a lot of Kosher food just wasn't availabl at the time we were loooking to relocate.

We couldn't afford Monsey, Morristown, Chicago, or Pittsburgh either.

amother

Tue, Jan 09 2007, 8:22 am

I hear you SaraG. That was one of DH's big concerns. He knows he won't make anywhere near what he's making now. But where we are looking, the cost of living compared to salaries is a lot better than you will find in NY. So I think there's a good chance we'll end up saving more. And if all things turn out equal, at least we will have our own home and a spacious property.

greenfire- thanks for your reply. Yes, we're totally worried about finding jobs. I'm considering staying here until I get my Master's in education so at least I can look for work in the school system. But at the same time, I'm anxious to get going already. But for DH, he's not a professional and has no formal education so it will be difficult. We're going to have to visit a few times and meet with people and hopefully find something.

chavamom

Tue, Jan 09 2007, 8:28 am

I live out of town, and I take exception to the quote that tuition is the same here. From what I hear from people in NYC, it's not true. We pay much less.

ceo

Tue, Jan 09 2007, 8:31 am

amother wrote:

I I'm considering staying here until I get my Master's in education so at least I can look for work in the school system. .

how long will it take you to get your master's ? it might be worth it.

I do hear what Chocolate is saying, but again, all out-of-town cannot be lumped together. I find it really hard to believe that a similar position in DC would pay only 1/3 of what she is making now, since DC C.O.L. prices are very similar to NYC.

DH is looking for a federal job. Federal job pay scales are based on location. For instance, two people are doing the same job: one in North Carolina and one in Brooklyn. The guy in Brooklyn is going to be paid more, but not 2/3 s more! More like an extra 8-12K.

Again, you can't lump all cities together. your costs in cleveland are different from your costs in atlanta.....

OP, can you tell us which communities you might consider?

DefyGravity

Tue, Jan 09 2007, 8:34 am

What's the point in having a wonderful NYC salary, if you can never purchase a house and everything is a constant struggle?

I'd rather make less, but afford a house, and not have money be so tight.

shabbatiscoming

Tue, Jan 09 2007, 10:12 am

DefyGravity wrote:

What's the point in having a wonderful NYC salary, if you can never purchase a house and everything is a constant struggle?

I'd rather make less, but afford a house, and not have money be so tight.

that makes the most sense to me. I dont live in america, but my parents did just that when they had just gotten married. my father had a job in manhattan but my parents wanted to be able to own a home, not an apt. so they looked in the suburbs (oot) and BH were able to buy a house as a young almost newlywed couple.

overall living oot is cheaper than in a major city.

greenfire

Tue, Jan 09 2007, 10:19 am

Not only that there are different tax levels in dif cities obviously more for NY and more for the higher income.

Also, if you're handy, you can find a cheaper house and do all the work and save a whole lot there.

cm - you didn't want cleveland?

amother

Tue, Jan 09 2007, 10:21 am

I live OOT .Nice community realativly large. Housing is definitly cheaper, tuition is not much cheaper, food is about the same, & who said weddings are cheaper? $ for $ you get a lot more in NY. Volume!! Clothing shopping is easier in NY, so is more & better take out food.But, the reason there is more of certain things is because there are more ppl, living closer together. That means more congestion, traffic, faster pace & not getting far. I love going to NY to visit & I love coming home!

shayna82

Tue, Jan 09 2007, 10:31 am

I live in pittsburgh after growing up in L.A. and its a world of a difference. not onl yin the prices of real estate, but in the mentality. I didnt want my kids having the L.A. mentality of materialism and outdoing each other, keeping up withthe jonses. its soo important.

for a jewish family with a bunch of kids, living space is so important. here you can get a mansion of a house for 1/2 the price of most places. in L.A. half a mill can get you a hole in the wall. here you can get a 6 bedroom, 3 bathroom, garage, yard, finished or not finished basement... its unreal how different it is.