would you use FS if you know the cashier?

amother

Mon, Dec 17 2012, 9:08 pm

I would never use food stamps, unless I did not have a dime to my name and had nothing to eat.
By then, it would not matter if the cashier was my former best friend or relative, because if I were starving, what do I care who the cashier is? (IF she were my real friend or relative, maybe she would help me so that I would not have to be on food stamps?)
I would live on dry crusts of two day old bread and drink water, living on a park bench, before I would ever take food stamps. Maybe eat my evening meals at Masbia food kitchen.
Hashem should help us all, and we should never have to take anything from anyone.
But if you feel uncomfortable, why not shop at a different store?

amother

Mon, Dec 17 2012, 9:22 pm

amother wrote:

Why is Masbia food kitchen better than FS?

boysrus

Mon, Dec 17 2012, 9:22 pm

previous amother:

I dont think you are thinking so clearly this evening. if the poster is asking this question then you should assume that she is using food stamps for whatever reason. how then does it help her to feel embarrassed and attacked by you for doing so? and if you are going to share your very negative opinions, at least use your screen name to do so, it is not mentschlich to hide behind 'amother'/
you are entitled to your opinion, but it would really be okay to keep it to yourself, it is forbidden to hurt other people's feelings.

naturalmom5

Mon, Dec 17 2012, 9:29 pm

Amother above me please clarify. First off, if you really truely believe what you are saying why are you amother.

Second of all, let me get this straight. We all pay high taxes so that there is a safety net. I believe you have good values, but are a tad misguided. You would take charity and possibly deprive another Jewish family who may be even worse off than you, but you wouldnt take Food Stamps from the govt. The US govt has a lot more resources than a small Jewish charity.

What about medicare. How about services for a special ed child? Where do you draw the line ?

amother

Mon, Dec 17 2012, 10:34 pm

I repeat this line....

Hashem should help us all, and we should never have to take anything from anyone.

Amother because of good (or bad) current reasons/financial status.

amother

Mon, Dec 17 2012, 10:35 pm

amother wrote:

Why is Masbia food kitchen better than FS?

Hashem should help us all, and we should never have to take anything from anyone.

amother

Mon, Dec 17 2012, 10:37 pm

boysrus wrote:

No intention to hurt anyone's feelings. Just stating my own feelings.
I would become a cleaning lady and clean others' toilets before I would take help from anyone, including the very generous US government.

greenfire

Tue, Dec 18 2012, 8:40 am

amother wrote:

that's really insensitive of you considering the op said she is on food stamps

and can you imagine the horror of waiting in line at a soup kitchen regardless of it being kosher or not ... then everyone in boro park can see you don't have monies to even eat ...

food stamps are a better choice by far

and if you'd rather starve - go for it !!!

amother

Tue, Dec 18 2012, 9:14 am

In my neighborhood, there are a few different stores. I know one cashier and my husband knows another one. If I stop in the store where I know a cashier (she's not there often), and I see her there, I duck out and shop elsewhere. I avoid the store where DH knows the cashier because I don't know which one is his friend and I wouldn't want his friend to see our name on the card.

When I've been in stores and seen friends on line, I've pretended to forget something and retreated back into the aisles.

I don't know that many people in the neighborhood, so I've only used these avoidance tactics on one or two very rare occasions. If I knew more people and were always chatting with the people (acquaintances) in line, I don't know what I'd do. Truthfully it is pretty common to be on FS in my neighborhood. Nevertheless, it's no one else's business.

Isramom8

Tue, Dec 18 2012, 10:11 am

If I were the fellow shopper and you hid your situation from me then I'd never know that it's worthwhile to help you out once in a while when I can. So then we'd both lose out, and you'd be wasting your energy on being embarrassed by a life circumstance.

amother

Tue, Dec 18 2012, 10:14 am

greenfire wrote:

nowadays they are cards that are swiped - no different than credit cards ... nobody would even notice the difference unless you point it out

It can be more or less obvious depending on the store. In large, non jewish stores-- you're right -- it's not as big an issue. If you hold your card discretely, no one will know what you're swiping.

Many of the smaller stores - inc. most Jewish that I've been too - have different machines to EBT and regular credit cards - I'm not sure why - so you have to hand your card to the cashier and then enter your pin on a different key pad than a debit card user would. So it's a lot more obvious.

mommyof2boys

Tue, Dec 18 2012, 10:37 am

with all due respect to both sides of opnions I have a question for the OP and also for everyone else:

what is the reason for embaressment?
1) you are ashamed that you cannot properly support and feed your family
or is it 2) you dont really deserve food stamps but somehow you feel entitled and qualified.

OP if you really and truly need food stamps I dont see why it would be embaressing. people would be happy for you that you are getting the help you need to feed nutritious foods to your family.

I personally would feel very embaressed in your given scenario more so because it sounds like you dont want your friends knowing you are on food stamps because then maybe they would question if you are scamming the government?