Someone HELP! | Imamother

Barbara

Thu, Jan 03 2013, 9:15 am

Merrymom wrote:

First discussion that all mothers need to have with dd is that having s*x with a man/boy while a niddah makes him chayev karais. Is that what a girl would want for someone that they supposedly love? It's amazing how few singles know this basic fact.

Second is rush to a therapist with your dd. My dd tells me that she knows of two girls in her Bais Yaakov that are in a s*xual relationship. Both these girls are begging their parents to see a therapist but the parents refuse. Every teen should be seeing a therapist just to get through these years.

Now these girls are the just the ones that she knows about, she know of quite a few besides that are hanging out with boys. Do not bury your head in the sand and have your dh come pick her up from where she's supposed to be unexpectedly. Just because she says she's going to Shani's house doesn't make it so. Her boyfriend can easily pick her up from there or from a second place that the girls go to. Trust is not a right, it has to be earned and quite frankly your dd has lost hers.

Btw, my dd's hs principal tells all parents to regularly go through their teens' phones when they're asleep and not to assume that they're sleeping just because they tell you they're going to bed. Many times they're up late texting and doing other things while you're none the wiser. We live in a crazy crazy world. Forget trust.

Wouldn't the first thing you should tell a girl be that if she is intimate with a boy, she could get pregnant or get an STD, and that she needs to protect herself? (Boys are told that if the girl gets pregnant, "they" will be responsible to parent and support the child.)