Was this out of line?

miami85

Thu, Mar 14 2013, 1:11 am

After a long bought of underemployment, our finances are finally somewhat stable, and I've found it challenging to go shopping with 2 young kids. Thus, thanks to the wonders of the internet and amazon.com I've been utilizing amazon and their "subscribe and save" program to stock up on basic essentials--which happen to be large (2 sizes of diapers, wipes, paper towels, toilet paper--in bulk). I've also made purchases for purim, work related items, baby items, and other items that were easier to purchase on-line than in the store. Another big item was our stroller had to be replaced twice recently--under warranty--and came in big boxes (one yesterday) So we've had quite a lot delivered recently. Anyway, most of my purchases have been through UPS and we basically have the same person who delivers to our area everyday. Today she brought a HUGE box and said something like "This is getting ridiculous already/enough already" and muttered something like "you already can't get it through the door"--we have a narrow hallway near our door. I was a little taken aback by her comments. It seemed a bit unprofessional to me? The box was big and cumbersome, but not extremely heavy and was just all my subscribe and save items together in one box--I didn't tell them to package it that way. I guess I feel bad b/c I made a few more purchases that are still on the way, and don't care for her comments.

notshanarishona

Thu, Mar 14 2013, 1:28 am

I wouldn't take it personally. Disgruntled workers tend to complain about their job. It is a bit unprofesional but not worth making a big deal about.
I would try to offer her a drink or be friendly if she is regularly coming to your house.

amother

Thu, Mar 14 2013, 4:54 am

naturalmom5 wrote:

I'd report her
Makes no sense she has a job because of you

There is no need for OP to be so difficult. I wouldn't report her for one comment. She is your regular delivery person. Perhaps one day you might need a courtesy from her. Certainly you don't need her more sullen. Also I don't think her comment was so out of line to file a complaint. I would have answered her with humor.

We get a lot of deliveries. My DH had real issues with one particular driver. UPS did not fire him. My husband had to learn to live with him. For a while the driver would not ring the bell and leave important packages in the rain, etc. We still have our delivery guy but it is much better when he is not resentful.

amother

Thu, Mar 14 2013, 4:54 am

naturalmom5 wrote:

I'd report her
Makes no sense she has a job because of you

ElTam

Thu, Mar 14 2013, 5:12 am

Perhaps this person was having a difficult day otherwise (fight with the spouse, etc.) and took it out on you. We get a lot of deliveries at work and I tip the delivery people at the end of the year with a card. It helps except for with the surly U.S. Postal Service lady. She'd be grumpy if I gave her a dozen roses each day.

Don't take it personally. If it continues, I would consider calling UPS and letting them know, but not for one comment. (I would talk to the person first and explain your situation.)

amother

Thu, Mar 14 2013, 7:16 am

yes it's out of line -- would you be comfortable saying to her something in a very warm and nice tone like "I'm sorry it's so hard for you, I do plan to do a lot of shopping online...would it be possible for another of your delivery people to take on my large deliveries?" --maybe she'll get it.

zaq

Thu, Mar 14 2013, 8:04 am

amother wrote:

This was a very nice and sensible post--why hide your talent under a bushel? Come out from under "amother"!

marshmellow

Thu, Mar 14 2013, 8:44 am

Definitely - she's there to do the job and that's it. If you made the order, you made the order. You are free to order whatever and however much you want.

I do feel sorry for her. If she has to carry a lot up many stairs. It's not fair. It's the organisation's fault. If I were you I would call them and I say I am ordering a lot, and it is the same lady who comes to drop them to my house. It's really a lot for her to carry so is there any way you can arrange for a man to come instead to deliver my items

It's them who are creating this problem

She shouldn't have said that, it wasn't her position, but she was fed up and probably had a rubbish day and it was a slip of the tongue. Just give her the beenefit of the doubt and don't take it personally

Always open the door to people with a smile and friendly face

zaq

Thu, Mar 14 2013, 8:58 am

marshmellow, that all sounds very nice in theory, but UPS drivers are assigned to specific routes. UPS knows to the minute how long it should take to drive from Point A to Point B and expects the drivers to achieve that. Drivers are monitored electronically so the dispatcher knows exactly where the driver is at all times. Drivers who take longer than the predetermined interval are subject to discipline. Time is money. Trust me, UPS is NOT going to take another driver off his route just to deliver OP's parcels.

Furthermore, UPS drivers are expected to be able to lift a certain weight. If a driver can't do it, the driver is out of a job.

cookiecutter

Thu, Mar 14 2013, 9:05 am

It was totally out of line, OP, but I don't think it's worth doing something about it. This is what she gets paid to do. If there were no heavy packages, people wouldn't be paying UPS and she wouldn't have a job. It's like a doctor getting upset that your kids are sick, or a restaurant getting upset that you're hungry.

bnm

Thu, Mar 14 2013, 12:13 pm

introduce her to my ups delivery person or have her sent to him for retraining. he is here so often he recognizes my kids on the street (thanks to amazon subscribe and save!) My daughter wanted to get dressed like him on Purim, I never heard a complaint from him about the volume or size. Fed Ex just delivered me a HUGE box- carriage frame from a twin carriage and not a single complaint either.

miami85

Thu, Mar 14 2013, 3:16 pm

Thanks for the posts. For now I won't make an issue of it. We live on the first floor of our building. I'm not sure why she didn't have a hand-truck with her. In this case it was Amazon putting 5 items (including 2 big boxes of diapers) in one HUGE box--yes it took up most of my hallway. But that's Amazon's doing, not mine. Would she have minded less if it was 5 separate parcels--which it usually is? I mean I live in NY amongst MANY apartment buildings--many NY'ers don't even have cars and do a lot of purchasing on-line--even their groceries.

amother

Thu, Mar 14 2013, 10:06 pm

naturalmom5 wrote:

I'd report her
Makes no sense she has a job because of you

please don't report her. It was wrong but no need to make someone lose their job. That's nasty.

You have to give her the benefit of the doubt, you do not know anything about her life or anything. For all you know she might have felt really guilty about what she said afterwards. This has happened to me many times, and also there have been times others have apologised to me after saying something ridiculous and horrible they didn't mean at all.

It's not nice to report someone or be a snitch except for a case for which is serious and it must be done.

Personally if I reported this it would be something which stayed on my conscience and haunt me knowing I might have caused someone to lose their job. Terrible feeling.

amother because I don't want to sound over righteous because I'm not but this is the way I feel.

PAMOM

Sun, Mar 17 2013, 5:32 pm

While I'm sure it wasn't pleasant for yu to hear what she said, is it worth causing trouble for her job, especially in this economy? It's not like she's refusing to do her job. I agree with the posters who suggested acknowledging that all the big deliveries are a pain and even asking if she needs a cold drink. You'd be surprised what an acknowledging that someone has a hard job can do--it makes that person feel appreciated which can ony help you.