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Forum
-> Inquiries & Offers
-> Moving/ Relocating
amother
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 Sun, Apr 28 2013, 6:23 pm
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We may need to move near Lakewood. We are yeshivish, but more on the modern side, and my impression is that Lakewood would be too hardcore for us. Is there anywhere close that we could live and fit in better? Also, it's important to us that our kids' schools have decent secular studies. Thanks.
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causemommysaid
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Sun, Apr 28 2013, 6:25 pm
there is a big mix in Lakewood but the schools may give you a really hard time.
a lot of people in Lakewood send their kids to other schools in NJ like Bruria.
another option in Edison/ Highland Park
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amother
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Sun, Apr 28 2013, 6:30 pm
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OP here- wouldn't Bruria be kind of far? How far is Highland Park? We would be moving for my husband's job, so if we didn't live in Lakewood, we'd have to at least be somewhere that's less than an hour away.
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amother
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Sun, Apr 28 2013, 6:44 pm
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I live in Lakewood and would love to help you out. I'm not sure what you mean yeshivish, a bit more modern. Any way that you can elaborate on that? Also, I don't know how old your kids are, if they are high school then maybe Bruriah is a good idea for you. There are elementary schools that are definitely less yeshivish.
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amother
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Sun, Apr 28 2013, 6:54 pm
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Amother above- basically, observance-wise we are totally yeshivish (dress etc), but more open in our hashkafahs. No TV, but yes to videos we deem appropriate, yes to internet, yes to appropriate secular books/media. We feel very strongly that a solid secular education is important, though limudei kodesh still come first. We would encourage our kids going to college. At the moment, we have a two year old and one on the way, so that's a long way off. But while I think we could outwardly fit in, I worry about how it would work with our hashkafahs and do worry about schooling.
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naturalmom5
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Sun, Apr 28 2013, 7:02 pm
Yes live in Toms River and shop in Lakewood 
Seriously. Marlboro is a wonderful community
If you want anything that even remotely resembles a normal secular education STAY away from any Lakewood school especially for boys
Try Hillel in Deal
It's a good hour and a quarter from Lakewood but Yeshiva of North Jersey in River Edge
Www.ynj.org ,is by far the best school in the entire state of NJ
I can't praise it enough
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amother
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Sun, Apr 28 2013, 7:58 pm
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Another vote for edison hp being a good fit for your self-description.
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PinkFridge
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Sun, Apr 28 2013, 8:02 pm
I think that from the way you describe yourselves, you'll do much better off being close to Lakewood for all the good things, shopping, programs, visits, and looking in as outsiders and appreciating all the genuine positives, than live there and have to deal with a lot of things face to face.
If you do end up in Lakewood, I really urge you to find a rav and rebbetzin you can relate to and have an ongoing relationship with.
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mommyla
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Sun, Apr 28 2013, 8:08 pm
| naturalmom5 wrote: |
If you want anything that even remotely resembles a normal secular education STAY away from any Lakewood school especially for boys
Try Hillel in Deal
It's a good hour and a quarter from Lakewood but Yeshiva of North Jersey in River Edge
Www.ynj.org ,is by far the best school in the entire state of NJ
I can't praise it enough |
That's not true.
There are some boys' elementary schools (not many, but some) with excellent secular studies departments. I know of at least two. You just have to be lucky enough to get in...
And Hillel is not exactly conducive to any family that is self-described as anywhere in the realm of yeshivish. Sorry. It's loaded with practically secular Sephardi families. And yes, I know from personal experience.
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amother
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Sun, Apr 28 2013, 8:35 pm
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OP here. Highland park is just under an hour away according to Google maps. Certainly a doable commute, but if closer is possible, then that would be better. I have heard of the Highland Park community. Now a few other names were mentioned here- Marlboro, Toms River, Manalapan. Are there real communities there? What are they like? Do they have their own schools or use Lakewood's? Also, if we do go with Lakewood proper, aren't there different "sections"? Might it work if we moved to the right section of town?
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MaBelleVie
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Sun, Apr 28 2013, 8:44 pm
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If you live in Lakewood, or send your kids to Lakewood schools, you will spend your lives swimming against the tide. It's exhausting. I wouldn't recommend Lakewood for anyone out of the Lakewood box.
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amother
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Sun, Apr 28 2013, 8:52 pm
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Another vote for Edison/ HP! Its about an hour from Lakewood but its a nice drive. No tolls, almost never traffic. The schools there have a solid secular studies department.
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amother
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Sun, Apr 28 2013, 8:53 pm
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I don't recommend lakewood. It's hard enough to live here when you are the cookie cutter lakewood type. Your kids will not get a good education - and I send my son to one of the "better" schools that boasts a good english education. There is no such thing as a good education here - there is good for lakewood but not GOOD in comparison to other places. I allow my kids to read books that I approve and the school found out and gave me a call. It's not really the place for open minded people. I'd recommend highland park, marlboro etc
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Cookies n Cream
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Sun, Apr 28 2013, 8:56 pm
I don't think the issue is with living in Lakewood. I know some modern people there.
The issue is that you're going to have a very difficult time getting your kids into schools.
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amother
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Sun, Apr 28 2013, 9:18 pm
I live in Lakewood and I definitely believe that there are parts of Lakewood where you can find a place and feel comfortable. Not everyone in Lakewood is yeshivish, at all. I actually live in a neighborhood that is yeshivish, open-minded, similar to what you describe yourself. Many (most?) people where I live are not in kollel/chinuch-type jobs.
As far as education goes, if your kids are in elementary schools, for girls there are excellent options that are open to families as you describe yours.
With your boys, it will be harder. [I haven't been there in 5 years (I taught there one year) but from what I hear, there is one boys school that is a little bit more open and might suit your hashkafa. They also (from what I remember) have an excellent secular education department.] Otherwise, I'm not sure what your options are but if you identify as yeshivish in any way, I strongly advise you against Hillel or YNJ. Their education might be excellent, I just think your children will not feel comfortable there due to the fact that many families (in Hillel) are just barely observant and they will stand out, especially if they dress yeshivish.
If you want ideas of where to live in Lakewood, I would gladly tell you about different neighborhoods. If you are interested in knowing specific names of neighborhoods or schools, you can email me at looking2rentapartment@gmail.com. I'd love to talk to you about it some more!! Lots of luck with whatever you decide.
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amother
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Sun, Apr 28 2013, 10:14 pm
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Last amother, thanks, I will email you sometime in the next few days. You'll it's me from the subject line.
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Jughead
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Sun, Apr 28 2013, 10:18 pm
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don't all the schools in Lakewood have the "no internet" rule?
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small bean
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Sun, Apr 28 2013, 10:28 pm
The way you describe yourself you would fit into lakewood. It is not a box, as many would like to believe, and there are many schools that have a parent body with the description you are giving.
In regards to education, many girls/boys go on to college with no problem. All the high schools allow SAT's - and most students do score well on them.
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small bean
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Sun, Apr 28 2013, 10:28 pm
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jughead, the school I send to has no internet rules at all.... and it is not a modern school.
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