WWYD- Neighbor wants my wifi code

Log in / Sign Up

List of Forums + New Post Recipe Box Usergroups Following My Posts Bookmarks

Private Messages Advanced Search Rules New User Guide FAQ Advertise Contact Us

Forum -> Relationships -> Manners & Etiquette

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 Next

View latest: 24h 48h 72h

oliveoil

Tue, Aug 20 2013, 5:19 am

Either offer them to pay half and share it (if you are comfortable with it) or just say no.

That's what I've done and would do again.

anon for this

Tue, Aug 20 2013, 5:32 am

If you would like to share access, you can offer to split the costs. Please keep in mind that if your neighbor illegally downloads copyrighted content, your access may be interrupted by your internet provider.

amother

Tue, Aug 20 2013, 5:37 am

I wouldn't be comfortable with it personally but I know people who share with others who would never pay for it on their own. Some share the cost and chip in and others just use it. Or if a parent refuses to allow it for an adult child to be hooked up and they really do need it Exclamation

In a case of clear Tzedakkah - as in a neighbor who is clearly poor and on the receiving end of Tzeddakkah and can benefit from working or shopping at home it is a generous thing for them to let them use it.

wow

Tue, Aug 20 2013, 5:41 am

I'd tell her that on a steady basis such an arrangement will not work out regarding the speed etc. "ESPECIALLY" since she will use it very regularly for work!

amother

Tue, Aug 20 2013, 5:46 am

OP here. Thanks ladies. Feel so much better about refusing now. I really was beginning to wonder if my objection was really coming from a selfish place deep down but now I am relieved to find that it is an unusual request (esp being that I have ZERO Sheichus with neighb) and that I am 100% entitled to turn her down.
wow- how do you make your wifi invisible?
Can anyone help me phrase my "refusal". I'm a total chicken when it comes to refusing favors. Thanks again.

amother

Tue, Aug 20 2013, 5:58 am

good for you op -- I think it can be very healthy to be able to say "no" when one wants to.
not always so easy for everyone but gets easier every time.

greenfire

Tue, Aug 20 2013, 6:05 am

it's one thing if she's just passing through ... but to use it for work implies long-term ...

mommyhood

Tue, Aug 20 2013, 6:13 am

I live in a multi-family house and I share my wifi with my neighbor, they pay me $10 a month. My husband can see what devices are connected to our wireless so he checks periodically to make sure that only their computer is connected (we told them they can't share it with their guests).
I have had other neighbors ask to use the internet for a day and was happy to let them use it free of charge but for long term use I expect them to share the bill. I don't think it's an unusual request.

spinkles

Tue, Aug 20 2013, 6:20 am

"Hi neighbor: I'm sorry, but we can't share our internet connection with you anymore. My husband started working from home at night and we're finding that it's causing the phone to be choppy when he's talking to clients. I know it might take a few days for you to get your own internet, so feel free to keep using it until next Tuesday (a week from now)."

FTR it's very risky to share internet. What if the husband had downloaded child [filth] ch'v or something like that? It sounds farfetched but you just never know. Or other illegal activity. It would be traced to you, not to the neighbor.

amother

Tue, Aug 20 2013, 6:30 am

jackiejoel3 wrote:

A simple way out is to say I'm sorry but my Rabbanim don't allow me to give out the code to anyone. As youi say this is a kollel family that should end it pretty quickly and painlessly as YOU aren't saying no your Rabbi did Very Happy

ditto.

I have a friend who's DH in kollel (who'd use computer to type up torah etc.) fell into [filth] due to neighbor's unlocked wifi.
I don't think you will find ANY rav who'd tell you to share it.
Call your rav and ask and I'm sure will tell you NO

IMHopinion

Tue, Aug 20 2013, 6:32 am

Op, you can just say that anyone in your wifi network causes your connection to slow down.

mummiedearest

Tue, Aug 20 2013, 6:34 am

amother wrote:

jackiejoel3 wrote:

he did NOT fall into [filth] due to unlocked wifi. he either was assaulted by pop-up ads due to lack of secure settings and saw them a few times or willingly chose to look at sites. either way, that has to do with him, not the unlocked wifi. unlocked wifi does not force men to become [filth] addicts. that is an incredibly stupid excuse.

causemommysaid

Tue, Aug 20 2013, 6:34 am

if its a one time thing I would let.

On a regular basis then she should be sharing cost.

Its almost like asking you to pay one her bills. not really acceptable.

As far as legality, I asked the provider once. Comcast said that if its an apt building they are ok with it because its almost considered one home. so no stealing issues there.

mummiedearest

Tue, Aug 20 2013, 6:35 am

op, you don't need to give an explanation.

"I'm sorry, neighbor, it is not possible for us to share it with you."

repeat as often as necessary.

amother

Tue, Aug 20 2013, 6:41 am

mummiedearest wrote:

amother wrote:

jackiejoel3 wrote:

You are 100% right.
He fell into it on his own internet. Their rav directed them to put on strong filters and so they did. But he asked his neighbor for wifi code and fell more.
Yes an addict will always find ways to go on. Or even a non-addict who fell once is very likely to revisit-yes from frum to non frum , working to kollel etc.
But do you want that on your sholders? You are putting the michshal there. I am not a rav, but I'd assume most rabbanim will tell you this. V'ahavta leracha kamocha...you can be nice ot her and share other things, but this is more important.

And for all those who think it's only sick men, pigs etc. Any real guy will tell you they are suseptible to it.

amother

Tue, Aug 20 2013, 6:45 am

1- Get the kollel wife to provide written permission from her Rabbi, kids school and husband.

2- Get her to fill out a 10 page contract detailing everything she may and may not use the WIFI for, such as high class [filth], illegal [filth], legal but low class [filth], apikorsus, zionistic etc etc.

Contract should also cover any type of illegal internet usage, with her accepting all responsibility and liability.

That should scare her off.

flowerpower

Tue, Aug 20 2013, 6:56 am

Tell her that you don't have wifi. You have regular good old dsl. I wouldn't give it! Not for a kollel wife that wants to use it on a steady basis like this.

amother

Tue, Aug 20 2013, 6:59 am

mummiedearest wrote:

op, you don't need to give an explanation.

"I'm sorry, neighbor, it is not possible for us to share it with you."

repeat as often as necessary.

AIUI, if someone is on your WIFI, they can see what you're doing (if they know how, of course). Meaning that nothing you do is private. So the answer is "I use my WIFI for work, and therefore, for work-related confidentiality reasons, I cannot share my password."

abound

Tue, Aug 20 2013, 7:26 am

how can someone who is sharing your wifi see what you are doing

baltimoremom

Tue, Aug 20 2013, 7:27 am

My neighbor used to ask me to use the internet from time to time- like once a month, and what she did was I would enter the password into her computer and I would make sure the box that said save this password was NOT checked that way as soon as the computer goes to sleep or is shut down or she logs out she wont be able to use the internet again and she does not know the password.
and for the past few months they then needed the internet for a class so they have been splitting the internet bill with me and if you have cable internet sharing does not slow it down only dsl gets slowed down.
As far as a filter- a filiter can be put individual computers- so my neighbor was going to put something on hers because I personally have nothing but am ok with that for the moment- but its between her and her husband to do something not up to me

Page 2 of 6

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 Next