WWYD- Neighbor wants my wifi code

Liba

Wed, Aug 21 2013, 8:00 am

smilingmom wrote:

MommyZ wrote:

Since when is it selfish to not give away Internet service for free?

When you can help someone with no loss to yourself and you refuse to do so, that is selfish.

If you were driving to a wedding and your neighbor was taking public transportation to the same wedding, would it not be selfish to say or think 'buy your own car, why should I let you have use of my car for free.'

If your neighbor had a reputation for running really late and would make you miss the chupah? Then no, it wouldn't be selfish. If you knew your neighbor would refuse to wear their seat belt if you took them, then again, no, not selfish.

Sharing DSL slows it down. It is also illegal according to most provider contracts. Not breaking the law isn't selfish, it is halacha.

MommyZ

Wed, Aug 21 2013, 8:09 am

smilingmom wrote:

MommyZ wrote:

Since when is it selfish to not give away Internet service for free?

You are assuming sharing WiFi does not negatively impact the subscriber's Internet speed. There are locations that offer free WiFi. People who purchase it for personal use should not be guilted into offering free access.

sarahd

Wed, Aug 21 2013, 8:39 am

chocolate chips wrote:

There are a couple people in my area that have open wifi and I often see the chasidish guys who "dont have internet" with their phones standing by my wall using the internet.
Our locked wifi is called "get your own" Smile

Hey, do you live on 52nd Street?! When my mother lived in Boro Park, she had a neighbor whose wifi was called that. We thought it was so funny, we've been telling people about it ever since.

Barbara

Wed, Aug 21 2013, 9:18 am

smilingmom wrote:

MommyZ wrote:

Since when is it selfish to not give away Internet service for free?

I'm really glad you said that.

Do you have a car? I need to pick DS up from a trip at 5 pm tomorrow, and my husband needs the car. If you're not using it between, say, 4 pm and 7 pm tomorrow, I'll be over to pick it up.

Hey, you're not using it, I'll pay gas and tolls, the wear and tear for the short trip is de minimis.

If you're not using the car, refusing me is selfish.

Wifi is no different. Sharing your password may not be the same as using an open connection, but there are still security risks, it slows your own connection, and may cost you money.

More to the point, "selfish" is expecting that other people will take your needs into account before their own, sharing their limited resources with you so that you don't need to expend your own resources. Eg, expecting that because someone else is paying for an internet connection, they should provide it to you for free.

amother

Wed, Aug 21 2013, 9:27 am

This is always the challenge the fine line of selfish and selfless....its actually a great gray area and varies for each scenario. There is no point blank selfish or not and there is NO ONE who can blankidly state that one is selfish in this case. Each to his own, and I mean it in the bigger sense that you have no idea what one's reasons are for refusing a seemingly innocent favor. Stop judging and drawing a bottom line- ultimately guilting the innocent (don't mean to sound melodramatic but seriously...they may not be commuting any offense at all!) to do things they should/can not do.

abound

Wed, Aug 21 2013, 9:32 am

Barbara wrote:

smilingmom wrote:

MommyZ wrote:

Since when is it selfish to not give away Internet service for free?

Many people I know would lend you the car willingly

amother

Wed, Aug 21 2013, 9:37 am

And then there are those that lent their car, had it returned with empty gas tank, dented, or worse and have decided that they can't "afford to be so nice". It's nice. It's a Chessed and Kol Hakavod, Tizku L'Mitzvos to those who don't blink before they say yes. However, it is NOT selfish to hesitate before lending out a car, giving over access of wifi or anything that belongs to you!! I am tired of hearing assertive people termed as selfish...it brings the gentle hearted to do things they are not comfortable with and may come to regret. Enough said. Exploding anger

5*Mom

Wed, Aug 21 2013, 9:47 am

Barbara wrote:

More to the point, "selfish" is expecting that other people will take your needs into account before their own, sharing their limited resources with you so that you don't need to expend your own resources. Eg, expecting that because someone else is paying for an internet connection, they should provide it to you for free.

Yeah, this.

Really, it makes no difference whether it costs OP money or bandwidth or anything at all. In my book, selfish is feeling entitled to partake of other people's stuff while they foot the bill, and then making them feel guilty for not wanting to share. Entitlement is selfish.

CatLady

Wed, Aug 21 2013, 9:51 am

Quote:

If you were driving to a wedding and your neighbor was taking public transportation to the same wedding, would it not be selfish to say or think 'buy your own car, why should I let you have use of my car for free.'

The analogy doesn't hold up in this case - I would compare it to someone working in the same office as me, carpooling with me every day, never offering to chip in for gas and asking me to buzz by Costco on the way home so she can pick up TP. IOW, a schnorrer. I never mind doing favours, but I strenuously object to being taken advantage of.

chocolate chips

Wed, Aug 21 2013, 10:12 am

sarahd wrote:

chocolate chips wrote:

Hey, do you live on 52nd Street?! When my mother lived in Boro Park, she had a neighbor whose wifi was called that. We thought it was so funny, we've been telling people about it ever since.

Nope.
Theres one in our area called "sorryitsmine" and another called "callverizon"

I never wanted to be original just make a point!

hop613

Wed, Aug 21 2013, 10:19 am

To me this is pretty simple - you should not enable your neighbor to do something that is at worst illegal, and at best immoral.

There's a reason internet costs money - if no one paid for internet, they wouldn't make money.

To me this is similar to burning cd's - if you purchase your music, and your friend keeps asking you to burn her copies - what do you do? You are not losing out by doing it, except that it's not right. I guess it depends on your standards of what is right. In my book, both of these fall under the category of stealing. And I would not want any part in either one.

I agree, a one time basis is ok, but not all the time.

notshanarishona

Wed, Aug 21 2013, 11:21 am

abound wrote:

Barbara wrote:

smilingmom wrote:

MommyZ wrote:

Since when is it selfish to not give away Internet service for free?

Many people I know would lend you the car willingly

Yes, I did that.. Until my car came back not driving. That was the last time I lent it out.

yomomf

Wed, Aug 21 2013, 2:28 pm

I live in an apartment building. I had my upstairs neighbor ask for my password to check on some medical results as a one time thing.

Shame on me for not changing my password shortly after.

I noticed a while later that a lady who lives the next block over was spending alot of time at the upstairs neighbors house. My internet had been acting pretty slow but I didnt think to put two and two together.

I knocked on the door to borrow something a while later and found the lady at my neighbors house using the internet.

I waited a couple of days to change the password as I was really not interested in making it a conflict and knew it would be if I changed it right after seeing her there.

They didnt have the chutzpa to ask me why the internet wasnt working Smile

imamiri

Wed, Aug 21 2013, 4:26 pm

abound wrote:

Barbara wrote:

smilingmom wrote:

MommyZ wrote:

Since when is it selfish to not give away Internet service for free?

Many people I know would lend you the car willingly

I know many people that would be willing to as well.

But there should be no assumption that they must or that they will or that they are somehow selfish to not.

achayl

Wed, Aug 21 2013, 7:24 pm

letting someone else use your wifi is like letting someone use your cell phone time. You have a certain amount of data, even if you have unlimited you get throttled after a point. I wouldn't do it.

This actually happened to a friend of mine and she said that 'they don't give out the password, so sorry'. That was the end of it. she was shocked that the neighbor even asked in the first place.

Fabulous

Wed, Aug 21 2013, 7:28 pm

notshanarishona wrote:

abound wrote:

Barbara wrote:

smilingmom wrote:

MommyZ wrote:

Since when is it selfish to not give away Internet service for free?

Many people I know would lend you the car willingly

Yes, I did that.. Until my car came back not driving. That was the last time I lent it out.

similar situation here. Car came back twice with problems. And they didn't say boo when it clearly had on signals that something was wrong. this is costing me both money, time and energy and I have since stopped because I just can't deal with it.