Frum family Income Question

amother

Emerald

Sun, Jun 07 2015, 9:03 am

amother wrote:

No one included charity in their budget. We give 10% of our net salary. We live in the 5ts and make a combined salary of 350k before taxes and not only am I not saving but I must dip into savings every month. My monthly bills total apprx 20k a month including charity. My kids dont own one brand name item other than uggs which is usually a chanuka present or something like that. I bargain shop but still food bills are outrageous. And where's school supplies, toiletries ( my teenage girls can spend 100/m easily in cvs on toiletries), etc. It's mind boggling to me that with a 350k salary we having nothing to put away in savings.

this is mind boggling that you spend so much. We live on 1/4 of what you make and save. Its about life style choices. 100$ a month on toiletries???? Do you have 17 kids who run a salon? I doubt you have that many living in 5T. What on earth do you buy???

mille

Sun, Jun 07 2015, 9:29 am

iluvy wrote:

Barbara and Racheli, I find the $82,000 tuition bill mind-boggling. Why don't we hear more about the day school tuition crisis? Is there no movement in the MO community towards cheaper schools? My friends and I complain about tuition, but I can't imagine that anyone in my community is paying anywhere near that, or even half.

We definitely hear a lot about the tuition crisis. Constantly (and I don't even have kids!). And yeah, there are movements towards cheaper schools. Yeshivat he'atid in bergen county, hebrew charter schools + supplementing judaic studies, many existing well known MO yeshivas developing new scholarship calculations, and communities providing tuition incentives for moving into the community. It's still expensive. Unless someone sees a tremendous amount of excess in the budget, the money has to come from somewhere... Where does it come from if we cut tuition in half? Ask the wealthy donors to just donate more? I'm not really sure what the solution is, but I don't think there's an easy solution.

staten islander

Sun, Jun 07 2015, 9:59 am

I am also MO,send to a local school,which is around 9K per kid and on the cheaper end of the spectrum. When they go to HS,our bill will be between 60 to 70k. Now,our expenses are about 15 K to 20K a month,between tuition and life. My husband makes anywhere between 300k and 400k,depending on the year,but I wouldn't say we live super lavishly. Tuition costs and day camp rates prevent us and most in our community from having more kids.

amother

Aqua

Sun, Jun 07 2015, 10:15 am

amother wrote:

What is so mind boggling? I spend that much at the drugstore too for our family of 4 in Brooklyn. The specific items we buy each month obviously varies depending on what we have run out of but we buy...
Family: Shampoo, bar soap, toothpaste, floss, mouthwash, hand soap
Kids: Kids shampoo, kids detangler, kids wash
Me: acne body wash, acne cream, moisturizer, face wash, face scrub, eyeliner, mascara, lip gloss, tampons
Variables: kids pepto bismol, kids ibuprofen, pedialyte, sunscreen, biosilk, alcohol, bandaid, toothbrushes, just to name a few...

I can imagine with teenagers it's only worse

amother

Emerald

Sun, Jun 07 2015, 10:28 am

amother wrote:

I do not buy this stuff in drug stores at full price! Its super expensive there. Even shoprite is cheaper on toiletries. I do buy stuff at great prices if I take advantage of drug store sales and cash back rewards and stuff like that but then im doing very well!! I stock up and dont need to buy every month. Otherwise costco/bjs or supermarket sales save alot of money if I dont want to be bothered shopping the sales. My teens can very well make me a list and I can get stuff at costco or I can stock up on their favorite products.

But with an income of 350k, I dont think the 100$ a month really makes a difference for you.

amother

Emerald

Sun, Jun 07 2015, 10:51 am

gp2.0 wrote:

I'm curious, do you know how much the average salary is for speech therapists?

Not really an average... depends if you work EI/agency/DOE or hospital/rehab or a combo of things. Alot of SLPs do a combo of things. I work for the DOE and do a little bit of work after school and make about 85 - 90, but I dont work much after school and I dont work summers. If I worked summers, I could easily make an extra 15k without working hard. I choose to stay home with my kids though.

amother

Ivory

Sun, Jun 07 2015, 10:53 am

amother wrote:

Not to attack you or anything, but how in the world are you not making it on a 350k salary? Ok, so after taxes it's probably closer to $250k or so (yikes!). But still! We're on track to make that kind of salary in a few years and plan on sending our kids to MO day schools, which I know are very expensive. We want to live OOT but I could see us ending up in a 5T/Teaneck type of community (read: very expensive). I thought that with our salary of 350k+ we would be "safe".

So I'm genuinely curious: how are you not making it? What are your bills? What are you spending on? Is 100k+ of your income going to tuition, so you're effectively living on 150k/year? For all the hard work we're putting in, I don't want to look forward of financial insecurity. Financial security is basically the only thing I have to look forward to!!

gp2.0

Sun, Jun 07 2015, 11:19 am

amother wrote:

OK, thanks!

asp40

Sun, Jun 07 2015, 12:55 pm

You cannot just look at the numbers. A lot of it depends on, when did you start making good money? If you are making $200,000 before you have kids, or before you have kids in school, that is way different than starting to make $200,000 when your 4th kids enters school. You have had time to save. Once you have those tuition bills, even if you salary increases $10-20,000/year it barely makes a difference. You are paying more in taxes and your expenses are already huge and you probably have little to no savings.

Last edited by asp40 on Sun, Jun 07 2015, 1:19 pm; edited 1 time in total

amother

Cobalt

Sun, Jun 07 2015, 1:02 pm

I agree with the 2nd poster's estimates, except to say that h.s. tuitions are generally closer to $15k on the low end, closer to $20 or even more on the higher end. Also, you have to be able to save for the down-payment in order to have the mortgage

Last edited by amother on Thu, Feb 27 2020, 8:39 pm; edited 1 time in total

amother

Cyan

Sun, Jun 07 2015, 1:26 pm

amother wrote:

We lived in Teaneck on this salary and I totally understand. It's not 250k after taxes, it's less especially since you fall into the AMT in this tax bracket. If you watch your money you will be fine on that salary, but after 80k to tuition and sleepaway camps, if you want to live in a good area and do renovations on your home, and have some cleaning help, and go on (even inexpensive) vacations, and buy decent clothing for your kids (not designer but not only sticking to the lowest end brands), and charitably donate as you are expected to do when you make "that much" then 350k will not make you feel comfortable. You will live well and look like you are living well, but you will not feel rich or safe. You will if you live below what has become the standard of living there. So it's a personal choice, but personally we found that hard and chose to live elsewhere...

amother

Cobalt

Sun, Jun 07 2015, 1:37 pm

As far as gov't tuition help, there is currently legislation now in the works in NY. My kids' yeshiva asked all parents to contact our Assembly Members and urge them to bring the bill to the floor for a vote. Maybe I'll start a s/o thread on this actually.
More info at:
http://www.investined.org/

Last edited by amother on Sat, Dec 02 2023, 11:54 pm; edited 1 time in total

amother

Ivory

Sun, Jun 07 2015, 3:34 pm

amother wrote:

This is really good to know. I knew that taxes in NJ were high so it wasn't the ideal place to live, but Teaneck was definitely up there. Maybe in 10 years things will be different (doubtful) but I'm glad to know how it really is. But geez. $350k and still counting pennies. That's crazy.

amother

Gray

Sun, Jun 07 2015, 5:21 pm

asp40 wrote:

This is definitely very true. Im wondering how the numbers play out here. If a couple makes $150,000 before they have kids in school, will they struggle less than the couple who make close to nothing (ie. Both in school) for the first 10 years but then $300- 400,000 by the time they have to pay at least 3 tuition bills?