Not one thank you | Imamother

amother

Green

Thu, Jun 23 2016, 8:10 pm

I agree with one of the posters that u should NT be expecting anything! Did u only make creative lessons for the "thank u" or because u are "doing ur job" ??..... I am a parent who doesn't participate in the gifts because of financial reasons and also am not grateful for the teacher who ignored my concerns... But even if I were to write a thank u note if a teacher was really looking out for my child and actually"teaching" wat I consider grade appropriate material, it seems that the "only acceptable"thank u" is money" and wen I add up all the "money gifts" its just too expensive (I don't send my kids to camp don't have hired help...)

I don't think teachers would really be "happy' if I wrote note without money or gift!!
Stop expecting things!!!do u think u "show thank u" to every single person who does or did something for u???stop being so harsh on parents for not saying thank u!! The parents who are working hard to pay tuition are saying thank u by paying tuition to enable school to pay u for ur job!!! If school is paying very little to u from the very exorbitant tuition charged then that's the issue---don't blame the parents!!

amother

Orchid

Thu, Jun 23 2016, 8:13 pm

Thanks so much for the replies. And to the amother that thanked me for the parents, thank YOU. I really appreciate that.

To the amothers that mentioned getting something in the mail, these parents don't have the teachers addresses. They only have our numbers and school email addresses.

To the amother that mentioned a group gift, it's not happening. By chanukah time the parent body tried to organize raising money from each class to give gelt to the teachers and they couldn't get enough parents from each class to give. I highly doubt I'll be getting anything. This isn't a school that's considered 'wealthy' or 'not wealthy', there's a very big mix. I honestly don't care about a gift. I'm just disappointed that not one parent thought to say thank you.

amother

Orchid

Thu, Jun 23 2016, 8:18 pm

amother wrote:

Wow. This is not a money issue, not sure why you're making it one. This is an issue that people don't appreciate what other people do for them. If someone held the door open for you, you wouldn't say thank you? You most likely would. Otherwise you'd be considered rude.

Like I mentioned a few times, I don't need a gift or money. I just wanted at least one parent to acknowledge me as their childs teacher. They always found me when they had an issue. When it comes time to say thank you, they're nowhere to be found. I emailed out so many pictures of the students over the year and 'last day of school' pictures today. Not one parent responded. That's not normal. If you got an email with a picture of your child and wrote back a thank you letter, I can assure you that teacher would have appreciated it.

I'm also on a tight budget but got something very small for my own kids teachers and wrote a very thoughtful note. Each teacher/therapist texted me that they mostly appreciated the note.

Your tuition is not a thank you to the teacher. That's you paying the school for your child to attend. That's like getting a manicure, paying for the manicure, then saying to the manicurist, 'sorry I can't thank you, I just paid for this manicure and that's my thank you.'

amother

Burgundy

Thu, Jun 23 2016, 8:29 pm

amother wrote:

Whoa that was a whole lot of projection!

Do you really not thank all the people who work hard for you even if you paid them? That is basic human decency.

Seriously, no need to be nasty and imagine things which were never said.

amother

Salmon

Thu, Jun 23 2016, 9:07 pm

Op if you got not one thank you I would venture to say that obviously parents weren't happy with you this year. I used to give end of the year presents to all teachers automatically but now I just do it for teachers that I feel really went out of their way for my child and didn't test my child like every other kid in the class.

One daughter who is a top student I heard from the teacher twice on each pta and never again why should I thank her? My daughter is a perfect student and made her life easier and not once was she able to call me and tell me how great my daughter is. Not once was she able to pick up the phone and compliment me why should I thank her now when she never bothered calling me once throughout the year?

amother

Orchid

Thu, Jun 23 2016, 9:15 pm

amother wrote:

I don't know why I have to defend myself because I'm disappointed for not getting thanks, but I will. I'm not a teacher that does it because it's a job. I teach because I love developing children and helping them reach their potential. This particular parent body have been more uninvolved this year, but I really thought at the end of the year there would be some acknowledgment.

Edited because I was really uncomfortable defending my teaching abilities.

amother

Orchid

Thu, Jun 23 2016, 9:16 pm

naomi2 wrote:

Thank you op for inspiring me to send out thank you email.
im embarrassed that I didnt think of it on my own. teachers are under-appreciated and its very wrong. the amount of effort and patience that goes into teaching is enormous. I'd like to thank you op, and recognize that you gave it your all this year and you did a world of good for your students. I'm giving you a cyber pat on the back- you are special and important!

Thank you

allthingsblue

Thu, Jun 23 2016, 9:28 pm

amother wrote:

The teacher's job is not to "pick up the phone and compliment" you, it is to teach your child.
I think it is ruthless of you to accuse op of being a bad teacher because she didn't get a thank you. You don't know op; you are making negligent assumptions. There's no need to hurt someone when she's down!

allthingsblue

Thu, Jun 23 2016, 9:33 pm

amother wrote:

Um, yes, I DO say thank you to everyone who does something for me (or I try to, anyway)! That includes my child's teacher, my doctor, my child's pediatrician, the mailman, my cleaning woman, my husband (many times a day), my children, everyone!
If you don't, you need to brush up on your manners.

As any woman who works knows, although you get a salary, it's nice to hear words of thanks and encouragement every so often. If I worked in a place where no one said thank you "because it's my job," I would be outta there so fast!

amother

Orchid

Thu, Jun 23 2016, 9:37 pm

amother wrote:

Look at the bright side of things. You got paid. This is not an identical sitch, but some people put in months of effort on others Shidduchim and if the Shidduch doesnt materialize, (sometimes even if the Shidduch does materialize) most dont thank the Shadchan, and the Shadchan doesnt get a paycheck.

I haven't finished getting paid, they're a few months behind. I really have no idea what this has to do with anything.

amother

Azure

Thu, Jun 23 2016, 9:43 pm

I feel so bad now. I definitely went over to each teacher and thanked them but I didn't buy anything. I gave with the class for my son. he also made a thank u card he colored himself for one teacher. (he saw her after school ended)
my dd teacher I just thanked and she made a card.
did I do enough?
I also gave chanukah money and gave them a cookbook in the mm with a really nice poem.

what do u suggest I give to a speech therapist who worked for 3 years with my son. I always gave her chanukah and purim gifts. usually a cookbook.

fbc

Thu, Jun 23 2016, 9:44 pm

Wow Op, that's so painful! I'm a teacher as well and I totally get you. You put your heart and soul, time, effort and maybe even money to your students, yes normal human decency would at least be a thank you. To the poster who said that teachers really just want the money, terrible of you to make such a generalization!! I teach because I love the children, I love how pure they are, I love teaching them and watching them grow. It's a simple thank you at the end to acknowledge our efforts at least, that goes a long way. I kept all the thank you notes from my past years of teaching, even if the gifts are no longer around. And to the amother who bashed us and excused her lack of appreciation because that's what you pay tuition for, homeschool your kids. This way you'll save yourself tuition & you won't need to thank anyone. I think ud soon realize how much thanks teachers deserve. I hope your kids learn from someone else out there how you really should show appreciation. Do you say modeh ani to Hashem every morning for giving you another day? Or no, because that's His job and your paying Him by doing mitzvos, so you can just skip the thanks?

amother

Olive

Thu, Jun 23 2016, 9:54 pm

amother wrote:

Every teacher deserves a thank you note. They spend hours taking care of your children every single day. I'm not a very demanding parent and no teacher called me up singing praises about my child. Nor did they send me special texts that weren't sent to everyone. I didn't call them during the year with any problems or complaints. However, they poured their heart and soul into their jobs which is to teach my child. They spend hours everyday with my child who is my everything. For that, they deserve at least a thank you! I think it's terrible that nobody even said thank to you after all you invested into their children. It doesn't reflect badly on you at all. It says something about the character of the parent body for sure.

amother

Emerald

Thu, Jun 23 2016, 10:00 pm

amother wrote:

I'm not someone you 'bump' into. I'm the person that spent 4 hours with your child every single day. The person that taught your child subjects, manners, how to be team players, to list a few.

All those situations you mentioned above, I personally do say thank you. I said thank you to the secretary every time she made copies for me. Every time I make an appointment, before I hang up I say thank you. Why wouldn't you. That person just helped you, EVEN if it's their job. It's called being polite.
Must?
What happened to our society today that saying a simple 'thank you' shouldn't be expected?

I say thank you in person. I don't send cards, gifts etc because it is crazy expensive and is always a crunch time. My kid won't remember to hand it to you and I don't know your address. And carpool is always in a rush. I may not have sent a written card but I thanked the teachers often throughout the year IN person. I don't send a card to my kids pediatrician, our mailman, or the receptionist at each of the bazillion appointments I go to- even if they know me by name. I say verbally how much I appreciate it. You do great work but I personally love a verbal thank you rather than a scribbled card or copy and pasted email.
Did not one parent express any sort of thanks throughout the year?

momtra

Thu, Jun 23 2016, 10:05 pm

OP, what grade do you teach?
I teach middle school where each child has 5 or 6 different teachers. All teachers get a group gift( which I most certainly appreciate) but I didn't get thank you from individual parents, and I understand it's difficult and time consuming to reach out to 5 or 6 teachers. My students say thank you and I appreciate that.
At the same time, as a mom, I write a thank you to all of my kids teachers, participate in group gift, and have my kids write a thank you note to each of tgeir teachers