RUNAWAY! | Imamother

amother

Wed, Aug 29 2007, 9:25 pm

She ran into the middle of the street. (2 years old)
I was pushing the stoller and she dashed.
Thank G-d it was a red light and there was no oncoming traffic! B"H B"H
I ran, grabed her and gave her a light potch on the leg. I held her in the fetal position, and she thought it was all a joke and pretended to sleep/snore. I told what she did is wrong, the cars will give her a booboo. She just kept pointing to everything around and babbled away, ignoring my words.

How do I stop it. How do I get her to walk next to me. She always walks away, sits, stops, goes in the other direction.
When I tell her to be next to me, she just ignores me. I feel like our discipline is a joke to her - she knows better!

Please give me advice to get her to walk next to us and not runaway!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

shlumzmum

Wed, Aug 29 2007, 9:30 pm

I had the same story once with my son and he also thought it was a big joke. I have a book with a story of a little red ball going on the street itself and a car crashing it. I told him that if he will run on the gutter and not hold onto my hand the same could happen to him. since then he always holds my hand when crossing.

willow

Thu, Aug 30 2007, 5:12 am

Amother that is exactly what happend to me today!!! I could not believe it. She isn't two yet but acts like she is three. She looked at me and I said come baby and she gave me her mischievous smile and said "no no" and dashed out on to the street laughing her head off.
I ran out to get her (thank G-d it is not a busy street) and I said NO NO and gave her a slight patch on her arm she looked at me confused then smiled. So I said ok no "tik". We just bought her a backpack yesterday and she hasn't taken it off yet except to sleep.(even that was hard). So that hit home. She started to cry. I held her and put her in the stroller (which she hates) and spoke soothingly to her trying to tell her I love her but she can not go in the street. Only mommys and cars and buses. I don't think she got the message at all.All she wanted was her backpack back. I don't know what else I should have done. I tell her everytime we cross. Ok we hold Imas hand in the street. I thought she was getting it b/c she let me take her hand and after we crossed she was off and running again. But today I don't know.
Sorry for the long ramble on your thread. I hope you don't mind. I guess I am just telling you I know how you feel and would also love to see what other more experienced mothers do.

justanothermother

Thu, Aug 30 2007, 7:03 am

Mine is almost three. She knows she has to hold my hand or hold onto the stroller whenever we are near the street. If she tries to get away, she has to sit buckled into the stroller for the rest of the outing. After a few times of trying to run away (B"H never getting to the street) she never does it anymore. I have found that repeating the same thing over and over, natural consequences and consistency work well.

suomynona

Thu, Aug 30 2007, 7:38 am

if my son goes anywhere I don't want him to, into the stroller he goes.
I wouldn't even let him walk vs. stroller if we're walking along a real street.
I'm talking about parking lots of which there are a lot of where we live.

greenfire

Thu, Aug 30 2007, 9:20 am

hello a 2 year old shouldn't be left to walk by herself ... they must either be in the stroller or holding your hand ... by the wrist ... so they can't pry loose ... why would you give them a patch for you not doing your part - how cruel ... that is not something they can learn but firm unrelenting "this is how we walk holding hands" - beginning and end - I don't care how many other kids and how many hands you have - you cannot leave her walk ahead - get one of those kiddie leashes ...

momof2

Thu, Aug 30 2007, 9:33 am

your right, maybe my 2 yr old shouldnt be holding on to the stroller. but when I take a walk, where else should she go? I have a double stroller with a 3 month and a 15 month old in it. Theres no room for her! Smile

BH, I can say my 2 year old holds on most of the time now. In the begining, if she would try and run I would say we only run in the backyard. I think she got the message after a few times. Also when we are right in front of my house, she knows she can run up the sidewalk into the house. (it became a routine now!)

Mommastuff

Thu, Oct 11 2007, 11:08 pm

Every kid needs their own method of disiplining. I let me dd walk beside the stroller when she gets antsy from sitting. I let her push the stroller if she wants or walk a little ahead or behind me. Crossing the street I hold her hand at the corner, have her check to make sure no cars are coming and then we cross and let hands go on the other side.

She "needs" to have control so I try to let he do her things, when I can, as long as it's safe. I try to finds things to say 'yes' to rather than 'no' to everything. I'm adement about safety.

if she tries to run into the street, I make it very clear to her that it was a no-no and she could get a boo-boo. If you see a car drive over some trash or something, point it out to her as a lesson.

momof6

Thu, Oct 11 2007, 11:31 pm

They make very cute "leashes/ harnesses" A child that I know, who is a "runner" wears an adorable plush backpack that attaches to a "leas" that her mother holds. It looks very cute and WORKS to keep her safe!
If I walked often w/ my todler beside my stroller, I would definately use one.

I very rarely allow my 2 yr o to walk beside the stroller (I have that luxury) If she runs ahead or towards the street she imediately gets strapped in. She understands the consenquence! The trick is to be very consistent.

GAMZu

Fri, Oct 12 2007, 12:16 am

This is a multi-faceted topic.

I'll tell you what I do.

When my 3 year old was 19/20 months, I became comfortable going on small walks without any stroller. I made it clear that he MUST hold my hand in the street, and I took his hand several feet before the street started.
He hated it- he'd kick, scream, refuse to walk.
We'd miss several lights and then I'd just drag him across. Of course, I explained why we must hold hands.
After a while he realized I mean business and it's futile to fight it.

I agree with green that it's a mother's main job to supervise her kids and do all in her power not to allow this to happen.
But if it does, you should give a LOGICAL punishment. I'm sorry to single you out, Willow, but yours is a perfect example of what not to do. Wink

Your daughter was so focused on her backpack that all she could think about is how mean mommy is. How does that reach her not to run in the street?
Putting a runaway kid in a stroller is the best solution- perfect lesson. You can't walk in a safe way, so mommy has to protect you because she loves you.

I got the leash for my now 18 month old about 2 months ago. It is so wonderful, although now he agrees to hold the special handles that my stroller has for toddlers on their height, so I don't use it much anymore.

happymom

Sat, Oct 13 2007, 9:55 pm

you just make sure that u are verty close to them at all times so if they try and go in the street u are close enough to stop them. u tell them, u have two choices. either you walk near me, or u sit in your stroller. when crossing the street either u hold my hand, or, I hold u... that works. of course giving them speaches is a joke at that age. and they dont listen to commands at that age. but I find choices work very well... and again the way to stop anything dangerous is just to be there to prevent it.

GAMZu

Sat, Oct 13 2007, 10:40 pm

And I would never lose a child.

Besides, you already put a "leash" on your child. Don't you strap your kids into the stroller? Why is it better for a kid to be tied down in a chair than to be running freely and being active like a child should be?

mumoo

Sun, Oct 14 2007, 12:17 am

I told my ds (then 2-3) if he didn't hold onto the stroller, he had to go in it. He was able to work his way out of the seatbelt. We tried the leash. He just pulled it off (there was only the arm band 15 years ago)

I have a 4 year old who knows how to get out of a 5 point harness car seat. They are both good kids, just 'talented' and strong willed.

It's easy to give advice when your children sit still.

With all my children-not just the runners-I used the iron wrist grip when we had to go into a street. I was taking no chances.

Mommastuff's advice about pointing out roadkill: it worked on the 4 yr old, she now gets what happens "when a car crashes you"