What's the earliest age you left your child at home alone?

giselle

Thu, Apr 26 2018, 7:02 pm

amother wrote:

These sound like really conservative ages to me, but I guess it depends on your neighborhood.
If I'd allow my five year old son to play outside himself, I'd allow him to play inside himself as long as he knows where to find me, or some other adult.
This year, he is allowed to go around the corner on his own (suburban, family friendly area, very few cars), so I have no problem going around the corner either to pick something up for 5-20 minutes.
My neighbor's six year old often gets home ten minutes before her mom. She knows her cell phone number and usually just plays outside with neighbors until her mother gets home.
My other neighbor has a responsible eight year old who is allowed to stay home alone if he doesn't want to join his mother on an errand.
Another neighbor ( kids ages 7,6, 4) will call her house phone, put it on speaker, and listen in on her cell while she drives the sitter home at night(2, 3 minute drive each way).
Of course we can say "what if there's a fire, car crash, earthquake. .." but the chances of it happening are not high enough to justify driving yourself crazy.

I wouldn't leave a baby with a child younger than 11, though. The chances of something happening are much higher with a baby or toddler.

Where on earth do you live?

amother

Seafoam

Thu, Apr 26 2018, 7:36 pm

WindowMagic wrote:

I think legally the age is 8?? Do not quote me though cuz unsure. Also unsure of the length of time allowed/reasonable.

In NY there's no legal age but parents can still get in trouble at any age. I remember an investigation in NYC into parents who left a 13 year old to babysit.
http://www1.nyc.gov/nyc-resour.....itter

amother

Cerise

Thu, Apr 26 2018, 9:22 pm

OK, are the mods able to see my name when I'm posting anon? I'm legit scared that people will call CPS because I trust my 5.5 year old to play outside unsupervised.
I check up on him every so often of course.
I don't get it. Is it possible for something to happen? Of course. But he's proved to be careful and responsible, never goes into the road, actually came running in to tell me when his friend was going into the road, almost everyone he sees knows who he is, and it's a super safe area. Literally the biggestproblem we ever had is that he once got a tick.
I know people (not in my area) who won't let their kids play on their front porch because what if what if. ..I think that's so harmful.

amother

Ivory

Thu, Apr 26 2018, 9:31 pm

amother wrote:

I don't think you're crazy.

Pretty much every single one of my neighbors let's their kids play outside alone at that age.

Obviously we live in a completely residential area with very, very little traffic and all frum neighbors. Obviously all parents will routinely check up on their kids, remind them not to run into streets for balls, and will make sure to know where their child is playing.

There are also always lots of mothers around with their younger kids so it's not like no adults in sight. And obviously if someone's kid that age can't be trusted outside alone, they won't be granted this privilege.

But my ds has a large group of friends to keep him company when he rides his bike down the block or plays ball in someone's driveway.

So no, amother, you're not the only one.

amother

Azure

Thu, Apr 26 2018, 10:20 pm

I'll leave my 8 yr old for 10 minutes during the day but I'll tell a neighbor and I'll let my 12 babysit at night up to ten minutes only if the 8 year old is asleep. I don't know if they'll get into an argument and fight.
This probably needs a spinoff but I always felt it was very unfair for parents to leave their young kids alone outside with the knowledge that another adult (me and my equally responsible friend) will be there. And then we go tell the mother do you know that a car bumped into your child? Do you know your child on his bike almost caused an accident? Do you know that a car made a loud short stop and the driver was shaking? Your child is bullying other children. Your child is hitting kids with sticks. Your child is throwing rocks on passing cars. Yes this all really happened. For every ten times we ignored them we would intervene once. It's very hard to sit there and say well if you cared about your child you would be outside when one child is seriously hurting another one. My friend would screech a high pitched WATCH OUT as kids rode their bikes into cars. When I ran to get kids from the road the driver would be angry at me for not watching my kids. How embarrassing! Not always did they stop for me to be able to tell them that it's not my kid. What about the boy that flung an open paint can across their front lawn on the first shabbos after pesach? My kids sweater shirt and pants was garbage after that. Bh I moved to a private house in a nice neighborhood where this is not a problem

amother

Ivory

Thu, Apr 26 2018, 10:25 pm

amother wrote:

Obviously parents of children who behave this way should not leave them outside unattended! I've never had these issues with my ds though, so I stand by my previous post. And yes, I know what goes on when I'm not standing over him since I frequently pop outside to check up on him without him knowing.

Ita agree that it can be extremely irresponsible. But you have to know your kids.