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Not everything is meant to wear with a shell!!
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PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Aug 02 2018, 11:08 am
SixOfWands wrote:
If it is so meaningless to you, why did you bother to respond?

Move on. Feel free to wear your Gunne Sax dress and platform shoes to the next wedding you're invited to if you don't care about fashion. The Fashion Police don't actually arrest people. And let those of us who are actually interested in fashion post here.


What's wrong with Gunne Sax and platform shoes??
;-D
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amother
Yellow


 

Post Thu, Aug 02 2018, 11:12 am
Raisin wrote:
Why the heck do you care? To find a tznius dress for a wedding can take days and weeks and even months of shopping for me. And money. Maybe to me or the person wearing that dress time and money is more important then being perfectly fashionably dressed.

I remember once going to a wedding and a lot of women were wearing dress shell combos that looked a bit odd. But after a bit of reflection I realised that our time, money and sanity is worth more then YOUR opinion.

As women we need to stop shaming other women (and men too) for their fashion choices.


I think what OP was saying was - there are styles that work well with shells, and those that don't. Not - never wear shells.
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OBnursemom




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Aug 02 2018, 11:18 am
My fashion opinion is that shells are way better than dickies (remember those?). I haven’t worn any of the styles listed in the OP though.
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PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Aug 02 2018, 11:20 am
OBnursemom wrote:
My fashion opinion is that shells are way better than dickies (remember those?). I haven’t worn any of the styles listed in the OP though.


Ah, dickies. Of course I do. The closest I get now to that are crop tops, with or without sleeves. (Tempted to go amother.)
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amother
Taupe


 

Post Thu, Aug 02 2018, 11:31 am
I think the statement "I think shells look ridiculous under certain styles of dresses" is actually code for "I think z-xy dresses with skin tight shells under them are still just z-xy dresses."

Annonymous because I'm adverse to controversy, and most of my friends do this. I do feel tho that sometimes people start up a thread under a somewhat false premise to make a different point all together.
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Raisin




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Aug 02 2018, 11:47 am
amother wrote:
I think what OP was saying was - there are styles that work well with shells, and those that don't. Not - never wear shells.


If you came to me and asked me my opinion if a certain dress looked good with a shell, I would freely give it. (I agree on certain styles not looking good) But its my opinion. I happen to think ballet flats look ridiculous (especially on my feet...) but clearly other people disagree with me. Same with clothing. I think many fashion choices are odd, but many others think they are fabulous. But no one asked OP's opinion. Why does she have to make other people feel bad?

At my wedding, some of my relatives lost a suitcase on the way to the wedding. A few people had to run around finding alternative clothing in a couple of hours. There may be a good reason someone is not wearing the perfect outfit.

And there are plenty of women on here who would say never wear shells also.
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amother
Pink


 

Post Thu, Aug 02 2018, 11:47 am
I think those ppl who wore those gowns with shells thought they look good. You, op, disagree which is okay bec u have ur opinion but so do they. Ur opinion is the opposite of their opinion. Also, like others said its easier /cheaper to buy gowns that are untznius(tons online) and pair it with a shell. Long sleeved tznius gowns are so much more expensive.

Its fine to have ur opinion but is seems it bothers u so much. Do u really spend so much time judging others by their clothes?? This is what I wrote in the "are rules stifiling?" Thread. Some frum ppl have such "unwritten strict rules" about dress and judge others harshly based on her opinion.

Op, can u agree that just as u have ur opinion that it looks ridiculous, so too others(those that wore it) think it looks good. They have an opinion too. They think it doesnt look ridiculous. Who is in "charge" about what they choose to wear?? They are.
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LovesHashem




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Aug 02 2018, 12:31 pm
fmt4 wrote:
Shells are ugly 99 percent of the time. There are so many long sleeved options these days.


Where?
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OBnursemom




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Aug 02 2018, 1:40 pm
LovesHashem wrote:
Where?


Right. I can rent a tznius gown in Brooklyn for hundreds of dollars or I can buy a non-tznius one at Nordstrom Rack/Off Saks/L&T for much, much cheaper.
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amother
Yellow


 

Post Thu, Aug 02 2018, 1:54 pm
amother wrote:
I think those ppl who wore those gowns with shells thought they look good. You, op, disagree which is okay bec u have ur opinion but so do they. Ur opinion is the opposite of their opinion. Also, like others said its easier /cheaper to buy gowns that are untznius(tons online) and pair it with a shell. Long sleeved tznius gowns are so much more expensive.

Its fine to have ur opinion but is seems it bothers u so much. Do u really spend so much time judging others by their clothes?? This is what I wrote in the "are rules stifiling?" Thread. Some frum ppl have such "unwritten strict rules" about dress and judge others harshly based on her opinion.

Op, can u agree that just as u have ur opinion that it looks ridiculous, so too others(those that wore it) think it looks good. They have an opinion too. They think it doesnt look ridiculous. Who is in "charge" about what they choose to wear?? They are.


So I'll connect this back to the thread about 'normalizing' the practice of not printing pictures of women. If its what you know - its normal to you.

So if you go to a few simchas and see women wearing spaghetti strap dresses with shells, it becomes 'normal' and though you 'choose' to wear it, you're doing so because its a learned idea.

Every so often it good to hear - wait a minute... this trend is going too far... do you realize this really objectively is not a good combo?

(I'll say there is a trend of hair accessories for girls which is very common that no one thinks twice... well as a bit of an outsider -I want to yell - you know it looks like your daughter is growing fur on her head, right?)
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SnowLeopard




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Aug 02 2018, 1:54 pm
It’s hard enough to find a dress for a wedding these days, especially if there is a color theme. Some people use the dresses they already owned before (when wearing a skirt under and a shell was perfectly acceptable) and don’t want to spend a fortune on a new dress. Other people borrow dresses or have body types that make wedding dress shopping a particularly difficult task. Or, it’s really hard to find something perfectly tznius where you live. Really, so many reasons why someone might patch it up. I wouldn’t judge one bit. I just wouldn’t wear a sweetheart neckline or cold shoulder top with a shell on a regular day (no judgement, though!)
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shabbatiscoming




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Aug 02 2018, 1:57 pm
OP, I dont know where you live, but Ill say that I live here in Israel seeing girls of all walks of frum life (from charedi to chassidish to dati leumi to modern orthodox) using shells and other things to make any article of clothing, and I mean that almost literally, tzanua. I think its great. Why not embrace it? I think its great. These girls/ladies want to go shopping in any store, not just frum stores, and so, they buy whatever fits them and whatever they like on them and then they make it work with something for underneath or for the sleeves. I think its great, personally.
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Ruchel




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Aug 02 2018, 1:59 pm
Not even all frum shops are tznius. I'd never shell (lol) out the sums I read about on Imamother. Plus it's cute, visually
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SpottedBanana




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Aug 02 2018, 2:01 pm
Ruchel wrote:
Not even all frum shops are tznius. I'd never shell (lol) out the sums I read about on Imamother. Plus it's cute, visually


Wow, Ruchel, making puns in your third language! Teach me your secrets Not worthy
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fmt4




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Aug 02 2018, 2:05 pm
OBnursemom wrote:
Right. I can rent a tznius gown in Brooklyn for hundreds of dollars or I can buy a non-tznius one at Nordstrom Rack/Off Saks/L&T for much, much cheaper.


I got at least two gowns from Nordstrom/neiman marcus that were long sleeved and gorgeous. Tons of people ended up borrowing them from me. Not more than 250 dollars.
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Ruchel




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Aug 02 2018, 2:09 pm
LOL 250 dollars... yeah, if you're the mother of the bride or groom.
edited to add on that topic I've seen BRIDES in shell/clingy white top/lycra under bustier/corset or sleeveless or neckline etc. it's GOOD.
I have found tznius dresses by chance in random places. If not, my choice is going with neckline or a shell. I am NOT adding a sleeved thing on. Nor do I think shrugs look good so much. And for daily life? shell is the most I'll consider. Layer can be gorgeous.

Banana I spend too much time online Wink
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PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Aug 02 2018, 2:15 pm
ladysupremacy wrote:
I just wouldn’t wear a sweetheart neckline or cold shoulder top with a shell on a regular day (no judgement, though!)


I think I got it. Is a cold shoulder a top where the shoulder strap or whatever is off the shoulder?
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shabbatiscoming




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Aug 02 2018, 2:17 pm
PinkFridge wrote:
I think I got it. Is a cold shoulder a top where the shoulder strap or whatever is off the shoulder?
just google cold shoulder shirt/dress. Thats what I did Smile
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singleagain




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Aug 02 2018, 2:19 pm
PinkFridge wrote:
I think I got it. Is a cold shoulder a top where the shoulder strap or whatever is off the shoulder?


Off the shoulder or any sort of cut out on the shoulder and down the sleeves
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PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Aug 02 2018, 2:21 pm
shabbatiscoming wrote:
just google cold shoulder shirt/dress. Thats what I did Smile


Brilliant!
Thanks, I'm sleep-deprived ;-D

So it looks like it's not off the shoulder but that new cut out shoulder look that I find annoying. I could see wearing a shell under some tops but a) not all styles and b) I want to avoid the extra layer.
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