I love Purim | Imamother

amother

Green

Thu, Mar 21 2019, 7:23 pm

So many people seem to dislike Purim but I don't. I love it. Not that its an easy day. Far from it. I have to arrange 3 separate parties for about 50-100 people each. (not single handedly but a lot is on my plate)

Hear megillah

Give MM to people in our community. We get hardly any back since most people are not frum. I think we gave out 60 and got back less then 10.

figure out costumes for me and the kids.

Still it is so much fun. I love making lonely old people happy with my MM. I love seeing the cute costumes people come up with. I love receiving the MM we do get. No problem with finishing it all before pesach round here. I doubt it will last past shabbos.

Also my dh doesn't drink bh.

Anyone else had/having a fun purim?

amother

Cerise

Thu, Mar 21 2019, 7:39 pm

I had a fun purim ,!!! I went to a local chabad party and was a volunteer and delivered the chabad's mms.
I gave out 5 of my own and received 5 back .
Today is my 57 th Birthday and my Best friend texted me to wish me a happy birthday,

thunderstorm

Thu, Mar 21 2019, 7:53 pm

I used to love Purim. Now I feel lonely and slightly sad on Purim. I realized why. I used spend the entire Purim going from friend to friend to deliver MM and to say Hello once a year in person.
My kids got older and now they have friends that they need to go to. More rebbeim . They need to go to mincha and learning. DH gets very overwhelmed and can not handle the horrendous traffic . I don't drive. I haven't gone to my friends on Purim in the last few years. However none of my friends ever drive out to visit me. So I'm left Purim at home alone until my DH and kids come home for the Purim Seuda before Shkia . I like the peace and quiet but I don't like the lonely feeling. If I drove I would enjoy Purim more because I'd be free to go wherever , whenever.
I miss the days when Purim was the highlight of my year.
I think if I did something that had purpose (like prepare for parties, volunteer at a soup kitchen, visit the ill and frail , I would feel happier and fulfilled on Purim.

amother

Taupe

Thu, Mar 21 2019, 8:06 pm

thunderstorm wrote:

Why don’t you take a defensive driving course?

thunderstorm

Thu, Mar 21 2019, 8:13 pm

amother wrote:

Why don’t you take a defensive driving course?

I've done it more than once. The phobia is so strong. I've gotten my permit four times already because it expires after a few years. I've been literally working on it for 18 years. I wish I could just do it and be free.

amother

Cerise

Thu, Mar 21 2019, 8:30 pm

I have a very bad phobia for driving . I went to a local hospital and they had a course
for people with all kinds of phobia's ex- speaking in public - hypochondriacs -
people who were afraid to shop alone or drive over bridges

each person was assigned a teacher to help them with their individual phobias .
my teacher drove with me 9 times it helped me just a little ,IM still very scared Sad

each week for around 6 weeks we would talk to the class about our phobia's.
we had a class of around twenty people .

ectomorph

Thu, Mar 21 2019, 8:37 pm

I love purim. I hosted over30 ppl this year. My kids were going bonkers from the stimulation.

The good news is that everyone including my husband crashed as soon as people left. And it's only been a few min and I'm the only one awake in the whole house. It's like a vacation. Can anyone relate?

amother

Babypink

Thu, Mar 21 2019, 8:37 pm

ra_mom wrote:

I love it too.
Though I admit sometimes it really overwhelms me.
But I really look forward to it and I live off my kid's excitement.

I can't say I love it or look forward to it, but like you I live off my kids' excitement. It's such a fun day for them and I don't want to ruin it with my stressed out attitude.

Though I really sympathize with thunderstorm- it sounds like your arrangement means not much to enjoy on this day Sad

amother

Floralwhite

Thu, Mar 21 2019, 8:43 pm

I love the tangible high energy of Purim.
Such a holy day -- its palpable
I do feel better when engaged in the mitzvahs -- bringing MM to people who may not be getting, who really appreciate it, hearing megilla, seeing the kids in their costumes so excited, and when I take the time to daven realizing we have a tremendous opportunity at this auspicious time.

amother

Purple

Thu, Mar 21 2019, 8:49 pm

I love Purim. We're very into cosplay, so we go all out on Purim. We don't go too crazy with the MM, so it's not a huge deal. It's nice that since it's not YT, we can have seuda with people we don't get to celebrate YT with. It's definitely an overwhelming day and I don't love the kids binging on sugar all day, but overall, I love it.

Honestly, I love all the holidays. Yes, they are challenging, but each one has something special, something to draw inspiration from. I look forward each holiday's special mitzvos. I love cooking and enjoy preparing menus related to each season. I love what each chag has to offer, even when I'm overhwelmed and dealing with logistical challenges. I don't mean to be preachy or anything, I get why all chagim come with frustration. It's just that for me, I connect deeply with the special mitzvos of each chag and that outweighs the frustration and overwhelm.

amother

Forestgreen

Thu, Mar 21 2019, 9:13 pm

Thunderstorm I don't drive and my husband isn't home all of Purim. I take A taxi for 2-3 hours and I go to lonely people with my kids.

Yes it costs me money but It's the highlight of their Purim and makes my/their day meaningful and exciting.

This year I had my neighbor's cleaning lady drive me around town. She took 20 an hour.
For 40 dollars we had a memorable yt.
(She loved driving us around btw. She enjoyed watching the fun etc)

amother

Seafoam

Thu, Mar 21 2019, 10:23 pm

We are introverts but we enjoy Purim. We enjoy the mitzvot of the holiday and participating in megillah (dh and female friends/relatives leyn). I am so fortunate that dh is not a big drinker, and we get together with similarly quiet introverted friends for the seudah. It's really nice when we do it our way.

seeker

Fri, Mar 22 2019, 1:17 am

Thank you, OP!

Yeah I get stressed by the stresses but I'm with you in choosing to focus on the bright spots.

No judgment toward people who are really too depressed to do so, or having such a hard time right now that the bright spots are drowned out. But people who are perpetually just grouchy about it should try to find the cheer. Go out and make someone happy. When you see cute families, smile with them instead of worrying about whether their theme is raising the bar for you. Technology is making it easier in some ways; I got virtual picture mishloach manos from my family in Israel "bo bayom." Yeah I spent a few seconds pining about not being with them but the adorable pictures made me smile anyway.

amother

Green

Fri, Mar 22 2019, 6:02 am

thunderstorm wrote:

NONE of your friends live within walking distance? Why can't you go to one or two while your kids are out with your husband? Or, join your family.

Rappel

Fri, Mar 22 2019, 6:14 am

I love the infectious joy of Purim! I don't stress about anything - it's not worth it. I love walking around, doing a little face paint, seeing all the costumes and fun ideas people had. I love hearing megillah as a group, often in someone's house, and drumming and telling against Haman. I always make very portable mishlochei manot so we can just carry them with us and hand them out as we see people. If I don't make it to someone that day, then no worries. I don't come home until it's time to prepare the seudah, and I love that too, when there is singing and divrei Torah, and a close, friendly feeling. I love the music. It's our Jewish carnival day, and it's very precious to me.

(I always feel like it's the kick off to Pesach, too, and that's my favorite holiday!!!!)

I'm an introvert, and I'm always completely done in by end of Purim, but it's too beautiful to miss. Smile

amother

Pewter

Fri, Mar 22 2019, 6:41 am

I also love Purim! It's a favorite holiday. I am disappointed we didn't get to everyone we would have liked to, so we ended up with a bunch of extra MM. This never happened before.

We went to the sudar and met the most marvelous people. I really enjoyed going to a place where people weren't aggressively begging for money. I thought this was standard, but it seems it isn't everywhere.

I would eliminate that part of Purim if I could. I don't like being heavy duty pressured for money, so it was a big relief to me.

amother

Burlywood

Fri, Mar 22 2019, 6:51 am

amother wrote:

Nice post to read. What do you put in your mm? You make 60 wow. Is it chocolate and a cookies? Just curious what goes into 60 mm. I made 12 and it was quite a lot of work.