How do u choose them and not the laundry list?

amother

Dodgerblue

Fri, May 03 2019, 12:21 pm

SuperWify wrote:

They have help.

No one can do it all unless they can live off 5 hours of sleep and function normally the next day.

Nope. I work ft. I sleep from 10:30/11 to 6:30. My house is sparkling and perfectly neat and organized. I have no problem functioning.

queen esther

Fri, May 03 2019, 1:14 pm

amother [ Dodgerblue ] wrote:

Nope. I work ft. I sleep from 10:30/11 to 6:30. My house is sparkling and perfectly neat and organized. I have no problem functioning.

Are you trying to be helpful here, tell us it can be done because you are amazing, or what? Good for you that your life works so perfectly.
I'm genuinely curious... Do you ever have stressful evenings when something has to slide? Do you have kids? Do you have the need for downtime?

SuperWify

Fri, May 03 2019, 1:21 pm

amother [ Dodgerblue ] wrote:

Nope. I work ft. I sleep from 10:30/11 to 6:30. My house is sparkling and perfectly neat and organized. I have no problem functioning.

👏 👏 👏👏 👏
Congratulations! Your the superwoman I have been looking for ever since I got married!

How’s this- I have one kid, I sleep from 12-8, I work part-time, my kid is out four days a week. I have cleaning help 2 hours a week and still many times I don’t seem manage What

. (Like today. I’m knee-deep in shabbos cooking, filling up the freezer and putting away the last yt loads and cleaning up again)
I guess in your eyes I’m a complete and utter failure. Oh well Whistling

Last edited by SuperWify on Fri, May 03 2019, 1:22 pm; edited 1 time in total

amother

Dodgerblue

Fri, May 03 2019, 1:21 pm

queen esther wrote:

Not trying to brag at all Smile

I posted what I do earlier on in the thread so that OP can have an easier time. I have a 2.5yo and I am b"h expecting. There are times when something has to slide, and it's ok. I get stressed out when I have to bring home paperwork. Occasionally, I'll miss a workout session. But overall- it's totally doable! Once you get into routine, it's not as overwhelming.
A few things I do to make cleaning relaxing- I listen to music the entire time. I'll sometimes watch standup comedy on YouTube while I wash dishes.

amother

Dodgerblue

Fri, May 03 2019, 1:27 pm

SuperWify wrote:

Everyone is different! I love to clean. Im weird like that. Its therapeutic and relaxing. That's my "me-time". Other people get overwhelmed from housework.
Also- I know myself well enough that if I were to hire help (let's say 2 hours a week) I would just let the house EXPLODE and leave it for the cleaning lady. So my house would be dysfunctional 6/7 days, and clean and neat for 1 day. And then I would get overwhelmed.

amother

Babypink

Fri, May 03 2019, 1:40 pm

Also a SAHM here. I have 4 kids including a 20 month old at home with me.
Errands cooking cleaning and laundry get done from 9-3
3-6 is being with my kids and supper
6-8:30 clean up after supper, clean up whatever mess the kids made and homework bedtime. No housework gets done then.
8:30-10:30 is me time, except before YT or a big shabbos meal hwne I have extra cooking to do.

amother

Silver

Fri, May 03 2019, 1:46 pm

amother [ Dodgerblue ] wrote:

Not trying to brag at all Smile

Ok so you have 1 kid who isn't home much to make a mess bc you work ft. Then after dinner, he or she goes to bed. Sorry but you don't know what it's like to have teens up later than you and elementry kids coming out of bed, trying to keep backpacks, coats, hw papers, lots of clothes in diff sizes and seasons all under control. You shouldn't have posted. She wasn't talking to you.

amother

White

Fri, May 03 2019, 1:48 pm

amother [ Dodgerblue ] wrote:

um, its kind of different when mom has 4/5 kids.
I dont know how ppl manage it all with sooo many kids.

queen esther

Fri, May 03 2019, 1:54 pm

amother [ Dodgerblue ] wrote:

Not trying to brag at all Smile

Okay, sorry I didn't realize you were the previous poster, thought you were just coming out of the blue and saying how great you have it all worked out, which didn't seem very helpful. Sounds a lot better in context of all the posts, so sorry if I offended you!

I do think though, that your schedule has a lot to do with current dynamics of one toddler ( bshaa tova). I have two kids in elem. chool and we have homework and baseball practice and carpools at 5 pm at 2 different schools etc etc... Not saying At All that it's easy with one but I think more controllable. Hope you always have such good time mgmt skills😊

keym

Fri, May 03 2019, 2:16 pm

You know, I always used to do all those things. Prioritize the kids. Do household chores after the kids go to sleep. Etc etc.
Then my kids grew up. I have teens who are still wandering the house, needing my attention at 9:30 at night.
I do my best.
Sometimes I have to ignore my kids and put a load in otherwise no one will have clean underwear and socks.
As my kids get older, supper has to be more substancial. There's a lot less scrambled eggs tolerated.

amother

Dodgerblue

Fri, May 03 2019, 2:23 pm

queen esther wrote:

No I am not offended!!! At all! I am so grateful that it's easy, thus far. I dont know what I'm gonna do once I have a newborn thrown into the mix. I'll take it as it comes, and itll all be good. But I cant even think of a plan until I'm in it.

amother

Dodgerblue

Fri, May 03 2019, 2:24 pm

amother [ Silver ] wrote:

OP never posted how many kids she has or how old they are. I am just giving ideas from what I do, if she is in a similar situation as me Smile

. If not, she can disregard my post.

Fox

Fri, May 03 2019, 2:34 pm

Just to echo what other posters have said, I don't know that it's necessary or even beneficial for kids to be entertained by their mothers for long stretches.

The most important thing is proximity and communication. Kids can play while you wash dishes or do whatever household task you're involved with. But instead of watching videos or even listening to music, talk with them.

This won't apply to everyone, but I found my most important parental activity was driving my kids around. I drove as many carpools as reasonable and was the first to offer to take kids to lessons, parties, or rehearsals -- through high school. The time spent in the car was absolutely crucial in knowing what was going on in their lives and having uninterrupted communication.

amother

Plum

Fri, May 03 2019, 4:10 pm

I work part time come home at three with my playgroup age child. I have a handful of children and no cleaning help. Yes I’m managing to do what needs to be done but I’m an emotional wreck. I come home at three finish dinner either clean bathroom change linen or wash floors all while entertaining three year old. Then I deal with my kids as they come from school supper homework and baths. Then nightly clean up. I sleep from ten to six. Often waking up during the night. Like I said before my house is clean and laundry is being done and put away but I’m emotionally falling apart

behappy2

Fri, May 03 2019, 6:03 pm

I love what fox wrote. In addition if you want to have time without feeling like the chores are calling then you literally need to set aside time. So for example I try to have suppers done before my kids come home and basically I clean, cook and shop when the kids are out. My 3 year old is great at "helping" and shopping, errands so I can kill two stones with one throw in that regard. My 3rd grader on the other hand hates shopping and doesn't especially like helping. I also do reading time with the kids at night. I want to reiterate what fix wrote. Its much more about the connection than needing to sit down and play with them. Different mother's at different stages in life have more or less time and patience to be able to do that. Children need to feel wanted and loved.

saralem

Sat, May 04 2019, 11:01 pm

I think I didn’t play with my kids enough. It didn’t come naturally to me. I worked full time and had a bunch of kids close together. My babysitter did the laundry and that was huge. I got up 1-2 hours before my kids to bake, clean, prep. Every day. I fell asleep before my older kids because I was exhausted. Unfortunately I needed to work to support our family. So that wasn’t a choice. And fortunately my dh was and is very hands on with the kids. Looking back, I realize that I should have pushed through my fatigue and done more homework and played more with them.