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Forum
-> Yom Tov / Holidays
-> Shabbos, Rosh Chodesh, Fast Days, and other Days of Note
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amother
Beige
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 Sat, Jul 20 2019, 10:48 pm
I used to fast, but then my DH was speaking to his (Chabad) Rav who said he thinks there is no point in women fasting except Yom Kippur and Tisha B'Av.
So that is what I do.
I am careful not to eat any "treat" foods on fast days, try to read something on the reason for the fast, and I try to put more effort into being a good mother on those days since presumably that is why I am not fasting.
If my Rav says that Hashem is not interested in my fasting, I will not do it.
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subby
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Sat, Jul 20 2019, 11:07 pm
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U guys r giving me a push to fast ill def try as long as I can
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bunnyrabbit
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Sat, Jul 20 2019, 11:12 pm
I am fasting and feel like the only woman in my city to do so. Everyone around me is pregnant, nursing or has a heter cause they have kids. Not chassidish.
I am only nursing once a day so don't feel like that's applicable to me.
But I have my period and am really not feeling great.
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Jewishmom8
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Sat, Jul 20 2019, 11:18 pm
I am planning on fasting. Lets hope I do not get a migraine. If I do I will break it.
In my circles most people do unless nursing or preg.
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amother
Crimson
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Sun, Jul 21 2019, 12:39 am
| amother [ Beige ] wrote: | I used to fast, but then my DH was speaking to his (Chabad) Rav who said he thinks there is no point in women fasting except Yom Kippur and Tisha B'Av.
So that is what I do.
I am careful not to eat any "treat" foods on fast days, try to read something on the reason for the fast, and I try to put more effort into being a good mother on those days since presumably that is why I am not fasting.
If my Rav says that Hashem is not interested in my fasting, I will not do it. |
As someone who always fasts and plans to fast tomorrow, I would like to know why there would be no point in a healthy Jewish woman (not pregnant or nursing) not fasting?
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sirel
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Sun, Jul 21 2019, 1:14 am
Fasting IYH.
I'm confused by the "no point in fasting" 
the halacha clearly states that women are obligated in the minor fast days.
Unless they are unable or unwell.
I can agree that the definition of "unable or unwell" is flexible and open to interpretation, but from there to "no point in fasting" is quite a leap.
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Rappel
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Sun, Jul 21 2019, 1:51 am
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I'm still within two years of giving birth, but I'm not nursing, and I feel healthy enough, so I decided to fast. I really appreciate the halachot of fasting - they're very tailored.
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amother
Brown
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Sun, Jul 21 2019, 1:56 am
| Rappel wrote: | | I'm still within two years of giving birth, but I'm not nursing, and I feel healthy enough, so I decided to fast. I really appreciate the halachot of fasting - they're very tailored. |
I don't think people are talking about a case like yours. It's the blanket rule in some communities that women just don't fast. That includes unmarried teenagers and women who haven't given birth in many years but are still young and healthy. That's what is perplexing to some.
(But I think we just have to say that every community has some areas of halacha that aren't observed fully, and leave it at that. )
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Forrealx
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Sun, Jul 21 2019, 2:00 am
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I always find it hard to fast. I try to always to do Thisha b' Av and Yom Kippur but the rest of the days are so hard to fast.
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amother
Beige
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Sun, Jul 21 2019, 2:04 am
Re "no point in women fasting":
The general definition of halacha is "understanding what Hashem wants us to do."
It seems that our Rav feels that the heter in halacha given for women not fasting applies to pretty much all women in our times. He feels that pushing regardless and fasting is likely to weaken our primary role as Akeres Habayis.
Thus "no point" in fasting, I.e. I am not making Hashem happy by fasting. Similar to an 8-year old that decides he wants to fast.
(I know that Rabbonim all have different opinions, and even among Chabad Rabbonim there are plenty of different opinions, but this is what my Rav said.)
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amother
Brown
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Sun, Jul 21 2019, 2:07 am
| amother [ Beige ] wrote: | Re "no point in women fasting":
The general definition of halacha is "understanding what Hashem wants us to do."
It seems that our Rav feels that the heter in halacha given for women not fasting applies to pretty much all women in our times. He feels that pushing regardless and fasting is likely to weaken our primary role as Akeres Habayis.
Thus "no point" in fasting, I.e. I am not making Hashem happy by fasting. Similar to an 8-year old that decides he wants to fast.
(I know that Rabbonim all have different opinions, and even among Chabad Rabbonim there are plenty of different opinions, but this is what my Rav said.) |
Curious, does he think unmarried women have to fast?
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amother
Violet
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Sun, Jul 21 2019, 2:16 am
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There are not many advantages to extended nursing for the mother so yes, I do enjoy not being required to fast today. 🙂
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Zeleze
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Sun, Jul 21 2019, 2:18 am
when I was a girl in the US we all fasted, all my friends, here in Israel, girls maybe do, or at least some of them, but for married women, it's very rare
So the answer is NO
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amother
Navy
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Sun, Jul 21 2019, 3:18 am
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No, I will not be fasting as I just had a baby last week BH.
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Raisin
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Sun, Jul 21 2019, 3:42 am
I generally find it easy to fast. So I fast unless I am pregnant or nursing. (A woman can be in perfect health and not pregnant or nursing).
I also find it easier to keep busy on a fast day.
If it was difficult for me to fast I would possibly look for a heter.
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amother
Pewter
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Sun, Jul 21 2019, 3:45 am
| amother [ Beige ] wrote: | Re "no point in women fasting":
The general definition of halacha is "understanding what Hashem wants us to do."
It seems that our Rav feels that the heter in halacha given for women not fasting applies to pretty much all women in our times. He feels that pushing regardless and fasting is likely to weaken our primary role as Akeres Habayis.
Thus "no point" in fasting, I.e. I am not making Hashem happy by fasting. Similar to an 8-year old that decides he wants to fast.
(I know that Rabbonim all have different opinions, and even among Chabad Rabbonim there are plenty of different opinions, but this is what my Rav said.) |
How about teens?
Do you also not keep Shabbat because it interferes in your role as Akeres Habayis?
I know women within two years of childbirth are exempt from fasting. I know that when the fast is nidcheh you can should break your fast if you feel unwell.
I even know people who say the lesser fasts shouldn't be fasted today in the age of geula.
I don't understand how women can have a blanket exemption from halacha. Being Akeret Habayit is not halacha, just like you keep kosher and Shabbat etc and still perform your role as a Jewish woman you can fast and be a Jewish women. If you are ill or can't function because of the fast for sure there is room for leniency. But why shouldn't a 16 year old girl fast? Why shouldn't a 50 year old woman fast?
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amother
Pumpkin
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Sun, Jul 21 2019, 3:49 am
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I am not fasting and I am not pregnant or nursing nor am chassidish, its gotten so bad the last few years that if I were to fast a half a day I would still be so sick so still not able to take care of my kids and I told my rav if I fast the whole day I have to be in bed all day to make it and he said do not fast the small ones
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amother
Burgundy
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Sun, Jul 21 2019, 3:52 am
| amother [ Pewter ] wrote: | | I know women within two years of childbirth are exempt from fasting. |
Any source for this? Genuinely interested. I gave birth 6 months ago and am not nursing, but feel very unwell and not able to take care of my kids fasting in this heat
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shabbatiscoming
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Sun, Jul 21 2019, 4:12 am
| Zeleze wrote: | when I was a girl in the US we all fasted, all my friends, here in Israel, girls maybe do, or at least some of them, but for married women, it's very rare
So the answer is NO | Interesting. What circles do you travel in here in Israel? I personally dont fact, but I havent in over 20 years except for YK and 9 av as I am a terrible faster and I get migraines very easily from fasting and was told many years ago that I only have to fast those two big ones, but I am in Israel too, and I know that the majority of women in my community, do in fact fast.
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salt
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Sun, Jul 21 2019, 4:18 am
| shabbatiscoming wrote: | | Interesting. What circles do you travel in here in Israel? I personally dont fact, but I havent in over 20 years except for YK and 9 av as I am a terrible faster and I get migraines very easily from fasting and was told many years ago that I only have to fast those two big ones, but I am in Israel too, and I know that the majority of women in my community, do in fact fast. |
Me too. Most women/ teenagers I know (who are not pregnant or nursing) fast.
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