Fast day | Imamother

LadyBee

Sun, Jul 21 2019, 11:55 am

Not me. Recovering from a week of migraines. Drinking and eating what I need. Since the purpose of fasts apparently are to express grief, show seriousness of desire for HaShem and doing what He desires mixed with regret for errors made (teshuva) and in Yeshiyahu he speaks of it being to end wickedness, to set free captives, and to assist the destitute, seems best to focus on such things. So though I cant fast today, these are things I hope to keep in mind and seek to accomplish in one way or another. Good day for self reflection and improvement and to assist someone in need. At least that is how I see fasts.

etky

Sun, Jul 21 2019, 12:17 pm

amother [ Dodgerblue ] wrote:

Doing laundry is ok according to Chabad. What do most do?

I was wondering about that too.
I didn't do any today just to be on the safe side, but I didn't read anything about not doing laundry on the fast itself in the booklet of hilchot Bein Hameytzarim that the religious council put out.
Somehow though, it just didn't seem appropriate even though I know that the other specific isurim of Tisha B'Av don't apply today.
In the same vein, another (theoretical for me) question that I thought of is if someone who is not fasting can eat meat today?

amother

Brown

Sun, Jul 21 2019, 12:21 pm

PinkFridge wrote:

You sound very erudite. I hope we hear your voice in general and under your sn too.
A few thoughts:
Yes to minhagim being mistakes, but not all minhagim I don't understand are.
As far as gebrochts: I guess some of the people I know make it seem tantamount to chametz Wink

I'm not sure if I'm comfortable with the words "don't measure up." To what?

I'm staying amother because a poster once pm'ed me nastily and I'm still scarred by the experience.

You are right that, just because a minhag is unusual doesn't make it a mistake. But when it violates normative halacha, you do need a justification, and so far, none has been forthcoming. "We don't fast because our rabbis say we don't have to," describes a reality but doesn't explain it.

I don't want to spend a fast day badmouthing anyone, so let's say this - there's standard halacha, and there's the common practice. Sometimes the common practice doesn't match up with halacha as it has been handed down over the generations. This happens in every Orthodox community. We have to be honest with ourselves about when we don't live up to the rules. We shouldn't act superior to those who don't, because surely we all have areas where we can improve. And yet, we have to look inward with integrity.

Rappel

Sun, Jul 21 2019, 1:14 pm

oakandfig19 wrote:

Woke up with a headache, it’s a nidche, and I had a miscarriage 2 weeks ago that I’m still emotionally processing. So no, I’m not fasting. I am going to try to read or listen to something meaningful today, but I don’t feel I could handle fasting on many levels.

If you're within 30 days of birth or miscarriage, then you are obligated to eat on a fast day. Same for YK or Tisha B'Av.

May you only experience joy from now on!

amother

Cerulean

Sun, Jul 21 2019, 1:27 pm

Rappel wrote:

If you're within 30 days of birth or miscarriage, then you are obligated to eat on a fast day. Same for YK or Tisha B'Av.

May you only experience joy from now on!

30 days for YK? I’ve heard much less (maybe 3 days?).

I fasted last YK, 2 weeks postpartum.

amother

Cerise

Sun, Jul 21 2019, 1:29 pm

amother [ Cerulean ] wrote:

30 days for YK? I’ve heard much less (maybe 3 days?).

I fasted last YK, 2 weeks postpartum.

For Yom Kippur it’s up to three days. And then from day three to seven with shiurim ( that might be only for c section)

Def not more then that

Beingreal

Sun, Jul 21 2019, 2:13 pm

I have 6 kidney stones stuck in my kidneys. I have to drink 10 cups of water a day. My dr. spoke to my Rav and got the psak I can't fast on any fasts at all because I can land in the hospital. On Y"K only I do shiurim.

amother

Floralwhite

Sun, Jul 21 2019, 2:23 pm

In my circles, all women over bas mitzvah fast unless pregnant, nursing, or sick. I am not fasting today because I'm nursing but I'm planning on fasting on Tisha b'Av. I used to be a good faster as a teenager and young adult, but having children has taken a huge toll on my body and I don't do so well anymore especially in the heat.

I find that I when I fast, it's all about getting through the day but when I'm not fasting I can actually focus on the meaning of the day so fasting seems counterproductive. Anyone else feel like that?

PinkFridge

Sun, Jul 21 2019, 3:10 pm

amother [ Slateblue ] wrote:

I live in a very hot climate (summers 90s to 100s) and I am 70 years old (no children around), nevertheless I am fasting. I always get up in the middle of the night before to eat and especially drink water. Then I go back to sleep. Over the years I've developed several tips and tricks for fasting. Usually I take KaliTzom right before the fast starts, but last Taanit Ester I forgot to do that and I still fasted OK BH. Also I try to sleep a lot during the day of the fast, and the rest of the time I keep myself busy with listening to shiurim.

Wishing everyone an easy and meaningful fast.

I'm 50+. Can you share your secret for drinking ~~after 8:00 pm~~ in the middle of the night and still getting back to sleep? Very Happy

PinkFridge

Sun, Jul 21 2019, 3:12 pm

oakandfig19 wrote:

So sorry. We don't say HaMakom and do aveilus under these circumstances but like you said, we need to process, and I'm still thinking thoughts of nechama for you.

PinkFridge

Sun, Jul 21 2019, 3:15 pm

amother [ Brown ] wrote:

Well said. We'll leave it at that and do as LadyBee (welcome!) top of the page says. This is a day for reflection and teshuva, as best as we can, fasting or not. (And not fasters, especially with lots of family to care for definitely qualify for the "as best as we can" rider.)

Jewishfoodie

Sun, Jul 21 2019, 3:29 pm

amother [ Brown ] wrote:

I'm staying amother because a poster once pm'ed me nastily and I'm still scarred by the experience. .

Hi amother Brown. I wanted to explain something to you about people who pm nasty things.

In my experience, the only people who pm nasty things are people who are suffering. Either in a bad marriage, either have no friends, no love, but they have an abundance of anger. Anger to spare, even.

So, instead of reading a post and just ignoring it, like 99% of the posters here, they just pick a "victim ", latch on and let her 'have it."

It IN NO WAY means you were wrong, at fault, unintelligent, or anything else they imply. Same with hugs. Its passive aggressive and the people know what they are doing. The nice people here hug because they actually feel your pain, and if you were near them, they would actually hug u in person.

Please feel free to be yourself here. 99% of the posters love you as a fellow ima. I promise