"Best things come in small packages" said to a tall person

nchr

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 7:27 am

amother [ Fuchsia ] wrote:

I'm 5'2 and I'm comfortable with it.
I wouldn't choose to be more than 5'3. I'm used to being on the shorter side.

Used to what? Being at a higher risk for health problem such as obesity, diabetes, dementia, depression, heart disease etc.? Being unable to have the same physical power or natural attraction as a taller person? Yes, short people can be strong and beautiful, but being tall naturally helps those things? Be paid less and less successful at work? Be less intelligent and less confident? These are statistics and generalizations, but they are true and proven in our society.

jerusalem90

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 7:30 am

amother [ Puce ] wrote:

I'm 5'5 and if I could have surgery to make me taller. I would. DH is 6'1 and so I doubt our children will be short, but I've discussed it with our doctors and we will probably give them HGH because even if there is no hormonal imbalance, it can give you an extra 1 to 3 inches so of course I'd rather my son be 6'3 than a natural 6'0 or 5'8 instead of 5'5. Everyone in my family is tall and no one has ever complained, but short people complain all the time or say they are making peace with the situation. I even feel conscious at 5'5.

What country do you live in where a doctor will subject a child to years of hgh treatment so that he will be 6'3 instead of 6'0? Sounds like a malpractice lawsuit waiting to happen, and for good reason

amother

Puce

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 7:34 am

jerusalem90 wrote:

The US and it's not considered a problem here. I wouldn't start until 10 or 11 for girls or 16 for boys, not toddler age like they do with preemies. My kids are not that age yet, but my parents did it with my sister, who was a late bloomer and I it was even covered by insurance. It's not harmful and is allowed to be chosen electively but then you just need to pay out of pocket. I know someone doing this now for her daughter because her projected height was 5'3 and the girl was personally not happy with that, especially since her younger sister is already 5'4 and still growing.

nchr

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 7:47 am

jerusalem90 wrote:

I think it's the opposite straight hair/ curly hair thing for women. With hair most want the opposite, with height it seems most see an advantage to what they've got.

I assume this is because it is generally considered something out of your control versus hair which can be straightened, curled, etc. So while hair treatments may not give you the natural look, there is still something to lust for, whereas with height you kind of just need to make peace with whatever it is because, as of now, there is nothing to do to make someone shorter or taller.

amother

Fuchsia

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 7:58 am

nchr wrote:

???

nchr

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 8:07 am

amother [ Fuchsia ] wrote:

???

Shorter individuals, especially shorter females, are statistically at a greater risk of experiencing all of those negatives.

Saying you're "used to being short" is saying you're so "used to" having a disadvantage in many areas of life, including your physical and mental health, that even if there was a choice, you'd still choose to stay disadvantaged.

Learning

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 8:48 am

I think if the aunt is saying that she must have issues. If you start with a comeback it can backfire. She might get offended and say something mean. Also She is older and it could sound disrespectful. Tell your daughter ahead to avoid her and ignore her. You can say: what did you say? If she repeats it just laugh. It is not that bad. Being tall is not an insult per se. all models have to be tall.

Raisin

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 9:04 am

nchr wrote:

She's clearly jealous or her daughter is/was. There is no woman on this planet (probably not in the modern world) who wouldn't prefer to be 5'9 over 5'4 or even 5'5.

I am 5 5 and it's already a struggle to find tznius skirts and dresses. I don't need to be taller! I actually feel pretty tall - I was one of the tallest in my class, and I am the tallest of my sisters.

amother

Ruby

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 9:11 am

amother [ Pink ] wrote:

I disagree re: every woman on the planet. I am 5’1 but if given a choice to be taller, I would never voluntarily become 5’9.

Totally agree. I'm 5'1, and while I would love to be maybe 5'4 or 5'5, I would much rather be 5'1 than 5'9. As almost everyone I know.

It is very, very far from being every woman on the planet.

amother

Ruby

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 9:15 am

amother [ Puce ] wrote:

I was about to say - yes, you can do it, but you will probably have to pay out of pocket. I honestly don't know how your sister was covered by insurance, there must be something missing in your story, because I just did this for my DS and the amount of tests (including an MRI) that we had to do before being approved was insane. And he DID have low growth hormone, which was why they even thought about approving it, but STILL they gave us a hard time.

Even if I had the money, I have better things to do with $30 to $40 thousand, but to each his/her own I guess.

amother

Seashell

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 9:22 am

nchr wrote:

She's clearly jealous or her daughter is/was. There is no woman on this planet (probably not in the modern world) who wouldn't prefer to be 5'9 over 5'4 or even 5'5.

Hello there! Here's another woman who loves being 5'4. I know lots of tall, beautiful women and lots of short, beautiful women. But I'm so happy being (American) average height myself. It makes life really simple and I like being shorter than my dh. If you offered me a free, risk free pill to grow a few inches I would politely decline.

amother

Puce

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 9:36 am

amother [ Ruby ] wrote:

We have Oxford Freedom insurance. The doctor wrote that she is emotionally bothered by it. She had a letter to that effect from a psychiatrist. Our parents appealed a few times and it was eventually approved. She never had an MRI. She took it for 3 years. The attorney we used said it is generally not too difficult to get it approved if you pursue it, and if not, my parents would have paid, just like they paid for braces because it was very important to my sister and they BH could afford it.

amother

Wheat

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 10:00 am

amother [ Puce ] wrote:

But why would you pursue it?! Why would you subject a kid to years of artificial hormones just to increase a NORMAL height?!

amother

Aqua

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 10:21 am

Another amother who doesn’t want to be 5’9! I am 5’2, and I wouldn’t mind being 5’4 or 5’5, but I have zero interest in being taller than that.

Truthfully, I’ve learned to appreciate my height, because I have a much easier time buying skirts and dresses. Many are just long enough for me. If I were tall it would be very difficult to shop.

And I do not at all believe that taller people are more successful and more intelligent. At least not within a normal height range. Jews are on average very intelligent and successful, and also short!

amother

Olive

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 11:12 am

amother [ Puce ] wrote:

They won't give it to a boy unless his expected final height is 5"3 or less. Being 5"4 is not considered a health risk.

amother

Olive

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 11:15 am

amother [ Puce ] wrote:

Age 16 might be too late anyway. Once puberty ends, once the growth plates close. The person you know, and even your parents re your sister, may not have told you everything.

spikta

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 11:15 am

I might be completely off, but it sounds like your aunt's comments are a combination of lack of awareness of how annoying and repetitive height comments are, and her wanting to feel good about her daughter. She could be saying this either for herself (my daughter is so wonderful!), or to display favor to her daughter (see how I say you're more wonderful than OP? See how much I love you?).

I don't think there's much you can do for the cluelessness, if she hasn't developed that social grace by now, she probably isn't going to.
But the comparison to her daughter, that you might be able to avoid, if *you* preemptively tell her that her daughter is wonderful.

I would try to head her off as soon as you see her - Ohmygosh Aunt Fruma! Your Goldie looks just stunning in that outfit! And I saw her daughter Shprinzie won a chumash award?? That's amazing! You must be so proud! Gush about them, and give your aunt a chance to celebrate/show off, so she doesn't have to show her love by bringing you down.
If you're gushy enough maybe it'll distract her from the dumb height comments altogether...

honeymoon

Fri, Jul 26 2019, 11:15 am

nchr wrote:

I find that really hard to believe. Maybe you're comfortable in your own skin, and there is nothing to be ashamed of for being short, but I am not going to believe that you really would prefer to be 5'1 than 5'9. Maybe if we were talking about 6'3, but not 5'9...

I am a 5'3 and although I sometimes wish I was taller, I don't wish to be 5'9. I would love to be 5'5, 5'6.