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Why is it a choice of my basic needs vs. my house

 
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amother




OP
 

Post  Fri, Aug 16 2019, 3:27 pm
The only time to do basic cleaning up, and I mean basic, is after my baby goes to sleep, around 11. And he wakes up a few times a night, and sometimes another child as well. I absolutely need my sleep! This is becoming seriously depressing!
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amother




Apricot
 

Post  Fri, Aug 16 2019, 3:37 pm
I'm sorry- I have a needy baby too and I can definitely relate. Keep trying to remind myself that it's a phase and it will pass.
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amother




OP
 

Post  Fri, Aug 16 2019, 3:38 pm
Thanks for the perspective, that helps
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mha3484




 
 
 
 

Post  Fri, Aug 16 2019, 3:50 pm
Have you tried baby wearing? Its so calming for the baby and it gives you your hands to do whatever you want.
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Ravenclaw




 
 
 
 

Post  Fri, Aug 16 2019, 3:52 pm
I don’t know what you consider basic, but maybe try the following tips to cut down even more?

Don’t fold any laundry that is allowed to be wrinkled, like underwear, pajamas, towels... just put it in the right drawer.

Keep Clorox wipes around the house to spot wash in less then a minute during the day. Like while kids are in bath you can wipe down the toilet, or while kids are eating dinner spot wash the counter with the wipes.

Only use disposable dishes. Even Shabbos. As for cooking, only use aluminum pans. Almost everything that can be cooked can be baked. I bake gefilte fish, compote, farfel, everything.

Clutter is an issue which I don’t have a solution to. Maybe clear up with your husband for ten minutes a night? I find when someone is working alongside me I work much faster. Or sometimes I ask dh to watch kids for 15 minutes and blast music in earphones while working. I find that when I am hyper focused like that I can accomplish in fifteen minutes what usually takes an hour.
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tichellady




 
 
 
 

Post  Fri, Aug 16 2019, 3:53 pm
I so relate. I try to make sure I eat, drink and go to the bathroom and then I set a time for 10-30 minutes to clean. I’m usually exhausted by the time the baby wakes up because I’m trying to fit in 100 things to do while she naps.
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SuperWify




 
 
 
 

Post  Fri, Aug 16 2019, 5:13 pm
Is there an option to get cleaning help even once a week for 2-3 hours to do your deep cleaning and bathrooms?
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gingie37




 
 
 
 

Post  Sat, Aug 17 2019, 10:18 pm
Why isn’t your husband helping?
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amother




Gray
 

Post  Mon, Aug 19 2019, 1:12 am
gingie37 wrote:
Why isn’t your husband helping?


Who said he’s not? Your comment reeks of judgmentalism and criticism, not empathy.
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finallyamommy




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, Aug 19 2019, 8:27 am
I second the advice to baby wear.
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amother




Ruby
 

Post  Mon, Aug 19 2019, 8:53 am
so then you need cleaning help. its not a luxury for you
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smss




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, Aug 19 2019, 10:25 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
The only time to do basic cleaning up, and I mean basic, is after my baby goes to sleep, around 11. And he wakes up a few times a night, and sometimes another child as well. I absolutely need my sleep! This is becoming seriously depressing!


Can you talk to a baby sleep coach to help get your baby on a better schedule? One of my babies did this too and I wish I'd known then that it's not normal and there's what to do. He and you will both be happier!
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jewishmom6




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, Aug 19 2019, 11:25 am
Ravenclaw wrote:
I don’t know what you consider basic, but maybe try the following tips to cut down even more?

Don’t fold any laundry that is allowed to be wrinkled, like underwear, pajamas, towels... just put it in the right drawer.

Keep Clorox wipes around the house to spot wash in less then a minute during the day. Like while kids are in bath you can wipe down the toilet, or while kids are eating dinner spot wash the counter with the wipes.

Only use disposable dishes. Even Shabbos. As for cooking, only use aluminum pans. Almost everything that can be cooked can be baked. I bake gefilte fish, compote, farfel, everything.

Clutter is an issue which I don’t have a solution to. Maybe clear up with your husband for ten minutes a night? I find when someone is working alongside me I work much faster. Or sometimes I ask dh to watch kids for 15 minutes and blast music in earphones while working. I find that when I am hyper focused like that I can accomplish in fifteen minutes what usually takes an hour.

Totally agree to this. Ask your husband to help out at night. You just need to state your needs and they are usually happy to help. It makes world of a difference.
It's so overwhelming to be doing everything yourself
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amother




Crimson
 

Post  Mon, Aug 19 2019, 11:32 am
Ravenclaw wrote:
I don’t know what you consider basic, but maybe try the following tips to cut down even more?

Don’t fold any laundry that is allowed to be wrinkled, like underwear, pajamas, towels... just put it in the right drawer.

Keep Clorox wipes around the house to spot wash in less then a minute during the day. Like while kids are in bath you can wipe down the toilet, or while kids are eating dinner spot wash the counter with the wipes.

Only use disposable dishes. Even Shabbos. As for cooking, only use aluminum pans. Almost everything that can be cooked can be baked. I bake gefilte fish, compote, farfel, everything.

Clutter is an issue which I don’t have a solution to. Maybe clear up with your husband for ten minutes a night? I find when someone is working alongside me I work much faster. Or sometimes I ask dh to watch kids for 15 minutes and blast music in earphones while working. I find that when I am hyper focused like that I can accomplish in fifteen minutes what usually takes an hour.


I'm in the same situation as OP and this is excellent advice.
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