Home

S/O criminal prices
Previous  1, 2, 3  Next  Last >>
 
Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum -> Fashion and Beauty

View latest: 24h 48h 72h


amother




Brown


Post  Sat, Oct 12 2019, 11:14 pm
amother [ Yellow ] wrote:
We don't have a problem with the people that really need the coupons & are using them.
The problem is that many many of the women shopping with the coupons are the ones dressed to the nines with expensive fancy strollers and brand name everything. Why should they be getting coupons?? To support and feed their lavish lifestyles??
Same goes for the people that don't work.


This. I see a lot of it around me.
Recently I was shopping in one of the local stores before Pesach and I noticed so many of the summer stuff was already sold out. I was wondering out loud as to who has extra money now to spend on summer clothing to which the saleslady responded that many pple with coupons stock up now with full wardrobes. Some of us that don’t qualify for these coupons can barely meet our yom Tov needs, let alone summer stuff in March. It’s def hard to swallow and it also feeds the competition/ shopping frenzy during the busy season. It just feels like everyone can afford everything.
Back to top

Amelia Bedelia




 
 
 


Post  Sat, Oct 12 2019, 11:17 pm
I remember reading not so long ago (maybe a year ago?) a short story in, I believe, the Family First that made such an impression on me. It was about two kallahs who were friends, one from a poor home, and one from a middle class home. The middle class kallah was scrimping on her purchases and was asked to donate for her poorer friend so she could get married "respectfully". At the end, the poor friend ended up with nicer, better stuff because she got married using tzeddaka and of course, she can't get less than all her friends, while the other friend wasn't poor enough to qualify for tzeddaka.
Back to top

Squishy




 
 
 


Post  Sat, Oct 12 2019, 11:36 pm
Amelia Bedelia wrote:
I remember reading not so long ago (maybe a year ago?) a short story in, I believe, the Family First that made such an impression on me. It was about two kallahs who were friends, one from a poor home, and one from a middle class home. The middle class kallah was scrimping on her purchases and was asked to donate for her poorer friend so she could get married "respectfully". At the end, the poor friend ended up with nicer, better stuff because she got married using tzeddaka and of course, she can't get less than all her friends, while the other friend wasn't poor enough to qualify for tzeddaka.


I didn't read that article, but I do see this IRL where people are donating and the bride is getting married in a nicer style than they can do for the own daughters. I have heard the resentment voiced.

Maybe the tzedukah standards shouldn't what the richest are doing. It should be somewhat near what the poorest working people can afford. This inflation of the standards puts pressure on everyone even the wealthy.
Back to top

sub




 
 
 


Post  Sun, Oct 13 2019, 12:00 am
Squishy wrote:
I fargin everyone their shoes. I don't want to buy overpriced kids shoes. I don't want to be gifted overpriced kids shoes either. They do nothing for me. I don't care for them.

The ones who can't fargin everyone their shoes are the ones whose kids must do without. It's not the poorest who are doing without. They have the same shoes as the wealthiest.

I know you fargin.
But how do we know who has or doesn’t have?
And who knows what is hiding behind closed doors?
And those whose children must do without, why are they not getting?
I wish there was a solution.
Perhaps vouchers should cover certain shoes within a certain price. Or maybe families should get a card with certain dollar amounts to specific stores.
Back to top

Squishy




 
 
 


Post  Sun, Oct 13 2019, 12:10 am
sub wrote:
I know you fargin.
But how do we know who has or doesn’t have?
And who knows what is hiding behind closed doors?
And those whose children must do without, why are they not getting?
I wish there was a solution.
Perhaps vouchers should cover certain shoes within a certain price. Or maybe families should get a card with certain dollar amounts to specific stores.


I know who doesn't have because people talk. I learn of the resentment that way.

Maybe there needs to be a community awareness of the pressure it puts on people who don't qualify for tzedukah so that those people can be included in something as you say. This community awareness needs to extend to the pressure it puts on working people also. There's no reason for $100 shoes twice a year for most kids.

I suppose the ones whose children do without don't qualify for the vouchers.
Back to top

amother




Bisque


Post  Sun, Oct 13 2019, 12:56 am
The shoes that retail for $100 cost the store $40, if that. The frum store owner agrees to provide them at cost, or just over cost. So it only costs the charity $40 or $45.

You’re not getting a national chain to do that. So if you give a $40 voucher to Stride Rite, you might not be able to get shoes. But you give a $100 voucher to frum store, it’s still WORTH $40, and you can get shoes.
Back to top

gande




 
 
 


Post  Sun, Oct 13 2019, 1:06 am
What bothers me most is that I know firsthand that there are many people who are on the ball enough to shnor coupons (from kehilla) and use them while having good jobs , only small kids and lots of money in savings.

The people with big families and working hard are not the ones able to be in the loop and go the the bes medrash the exact time they giving it out.
Back to top

amother




Blue


Post  Sun, Oct 13 2019, 1:08 am
How do you know who gets voucher and who doesn't? What
Most shoes bought in non jewish stores are not as well made as the Jewish stores and they don't last as long!! So if those ppl get coupons once a year it's really not that much!
Do you really look at kids shoes and try to guess how much they cost?
Back to top

Laiya




 
 
 


Post  Sun, Oct 13 2019, 1:40 am
amother [ Pearl ] wrote:
I think stores like tottini, clover, kiddi chic, sage (fashion wholesalers) are doing a chessed (even off 2nd). I know they are making a profit and it’s a business - but it’s so wonderful to be able to buy Shabbos dresses in current beautiful styles $25-40. My girls can choose what they want and feel gorgeous .

I wish there were more.


The existence of these stores just goes to show what a huge markup there is to begin with.
Back to top

amother




Forestgreen


Post  Sun, Oct 13 2019, 5:37 am
Bingo had was selling shoes for cheaper and they got a huge crowd . Shoes never go on sale 70 percent off like dresses do. It's crazy that after buying $80 shoes In September. If your kid needs new shoes halfway through the year shoes are still going to be $60. As a struggling momther of active kidsI can tell you I need to buy my kids foods sneakers all year round. It takes alit if time finding those in department store. And they are not cheap there either.
Back to top

amother




Indigo


Post  Sun, Oct 13 2019, 5:59 am
southernbubby wrote:
The idea is to prevent the recipients from feeling that their kids have less than everyone else.
Is there a specific category of community members who get the help, such as big families, single mothers, yeshiva Rebbeim, etc or it open to anyone who can't provide new clothes?


Well apparently they don't have less since some of the people who donate can't even afford the clothes their donating for.
It should be considered a criminal act to pretend one is poor, take tzedakah and not be poor at all.
If you do that with the government (get medic aid, food stamps etc) on the grounds that you lied, you also have to face consequences.

People like the ones you're talking about are the reason why I only give tzedakah to families I know in Israel who can't feed their families or buy BASIC clothes.
Back to top

amother




Indigo


Post  Sun, Oct 13 2019, 6:05 am
amother [ Bisque ] wrote:
The shoes that retail for $100 cost the store $40, if that. The frum store owner agrees to provide them at cost, or just over cost. So it only costs the charity $40 or $45.

You’re not getting a national chain to do that. So if you give a $40 voucher to Stride Rite, you might not be able to get shoes. But you give a $100 voucher to frum store, it’s still WORTH $40, and you can get shoes.


I worked with refugees in 2016 when Europe got flooded with teens or young adults who came here without parents. We gave them gift cards worth a certain amount of money. They could choose between h&m, Zara etc stores like that and they only got a certain amount.

It's absolutely ridiculous that these coupons even exist. Why not gift cards to regular chain stores?
Back to top

amother




Yellow


Post  Sun, Oct 13 2019, 6:06 am
Just as a BTW, I have almost never spent $100 on my kids shoes and they've always lasted the season. The one time I did buy expensive shoes, they looked like garbage pretty fast. Today's $100 shoes are not the same as it used to be, they're the same junk as the cheaper shoes. Kids don't "need" and "have to" have expensive shoes and clothes. Kids need and have to have what you can afford.
Back to top

Ruchel




 
 
 


Post  Sun, Oct 13 2019, 6:36 am
You never have to buy heimish. I avoid it mostly. Also if people cheat for coupons it's bad whatever they are wearing. If they qualify and have those clothes gifted to them or whagtever, well.... Kids with expensive clothing in daily life are not something I'm aware of even in the type of family that absolutely could.
Back to top

amother




Forestgreen


Post  Sun, Oct 13 2019, 7:05 am
Back to top

amother




Forestgreen


Post  Sun, Oct 13 2019, 7:10 am
I also find that there are coupons for rebbeim. The ones for people in chinuch raises standards more than the other coupns. I know rebbeim who are poor. But I also know rebbeim who have wives with good jobs, in-laws that can support them, and being a rebbe gives them flexible hours. So on top of being able to afford clothes they are getting these checks too. And they are given out early in the season.
Back to top

deena19k




 
 
 


Post  Sun, Oct 13 2019, 7:19 am
This is how I feel when people collect to give their children an apartment as part of hachnasas kallah. I live in Israel and dont see us ever being able to buy an apartment in the future! And they come knocking at my door (of my small apartment which im renting!!) asking for tzedakah for the down payment for their kids!
Something is very off with this whole system. Of course tzedakah is important, but not like this.
Back to top

amother




Amber


Post  Sun, Oct 13 2019, 8:24 am
You can choose where you give your tzedakah. I don't think poor people need to be dressed in rags to prove they are poor. I think it is fine for them to be supported in a way they look and feel good.
Back to top

amother




Amber


Post  Sun, Oct 13 2019, 8:28 am
amother [ Forestgreen ] wrote:
I also find that there are coupons for rebbeim. The ones for people in chinuch raises standards more than the other coupns. I know rebbeim who are poor. But I also know rebbeim who have wives with good jobs, in-laws that can support them, and being a rebbe gives them flexible hours. So on top of being able to afford clothes they are getting these checks too. And they are given out early in the season.

Ummm, what??
My father is a rebbe. These coupons did not exist when I was growing up. His schedule is far from flexible. He is at minyan early in the morning, comes home for meals and otherwise finishes the day with night seder around 10. He also teaches Sundays and Fridays and has shabbos seder he is sometimes expected to go to. It's nice that he has off for yamim tovim but I wouldn't wax poetic about all his flexibility. Many if not most rabbeim aren't making nearly enough so need to take on side jobs too. It's not just a 3 hour a day gig where they get all the flexibility and money.
Back to top

Squishy




 
 
 


Post  Sun, Oct 13 2019, 8:38 am
amother [ Amber ] wrote:
You can choose where you give your tzedakah. I don't think poor people need to be dressed in rags to prove they are poor. I think it is fine for them to be supported in a way they look and feel good.


No one is advocating dressing poor people in rags. Where is that coming from?

What is at issue here is the inflation of standards for the whole community and the pressure brought by dressing the poorest in luxury items.

I don't happen to like the heimeshe style shoes. I don't feel it's a good value for the money. DH took one of my kids shopping about 7 years ago and bought 2 pair of Shabbos shoes for over $200. The shoes were fitted wrong. I kept hearing of the great fit in the heimeshe stores. I returned the shoes, and they didn't have the correct size which was why the wrong size was sold.

I bought shoes on sale for a different child for $47. I could have bought similar shoes in Marshals for $20. I ended up giving the credit away after a couple of years.

No one would consider the shoes bought in Marshals rags. They were designer.

At issue is the pressure on working people to fund over priced luxuries that they can't afford themselves.
Back to top
Previous  1, 2, 3  Next  Last >> Recent Topics

Page 2 of 3 View latest: 24h 48h 72h


Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum -> Fashion and Beauty

Related Topics Replies Last Post
S/o s/of criminal shoe prices
by amother
66 Thu, Oct 17 2019, 3:19 am View last post
Criminal Prices 84 Sun, Oct 13 2019, 8:31 am View last post
Hosiery store- why no prices??
by amother
15 Mon, Oct 07 2019, 10:29 pm View last post
Who has best prices on undershirt tzitzis?
by amother
3 Thu, Sep 05 2019, 9:09 am View last post
Fine Jewelry sites with affordable prices?
by amother
0 Mon, Sep 02 2019, 5:01 pm View last post

Jump to: