Home

Dont know if the job is for me and feeling broken

 
Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum -> Household Management -> Finances


View latest: 24h 48h 72h


amother




OP
 

Post  Fri, Nov 15 2019, 11:40 am
Im going trhough a tight stage now financially. My husband works for someone and gets paid weekly but it really does not covor up all my expenses. I really wanna help out bringing in some income, and plus my baby is almost 6 big I really can spare to go out. Now the problem is that when I work for someone my anxiety hits up very strongly. That depends the kind of the job im choosing for myself.
First of all im looking into a job for a year in 1/2 now, and wasnt yet successful in finding anything. I applied in schools, kiddie groups since thats the kind of job I dont take so much pressure and can handle it.

Beginning of last week somehow I got a phone call from someone I called a long time ago applying for a job, and she tells me little about the job . it seemed interesting to me, before I went down I asked her if it comes with any computer work since im really not computer freindly. she claimed it was very mild computer...so I went down to look @ the job, she showed me what the job is all about, That was first day, lllll second day she started showing me the computer work and I got scared because I was very uncomfortable needing to deal with a computet but I thought to myself if it was bashert the offer let me try to learn it .
So the job is lots of multitasking like receiving orders ,preparing the orders for the ppl , but before I get to packge the products I need to prepare everything trhough the computer which I guess is considered basic computer. Now along with this job comes lots of memorization like names of ppl , products and product companey so it took me 2 days to learn just the techniques of getting to know and getting familiar with the names .. for 2 days she just showed me quickly how the computer works and then I had a space for 3 days like over shabbos and then 1 day the computer had problems so it was 4 days till I came back to learn the computer work, (and I want to add that this job I would have to do all by myself since boss lives oversees, she came to the u.s. to train someone to do the job from here.)
that means I would be all by myself if any problem pops up, im the only one to be there to deal with the job yet she would be with me in contact while id work , like if I had any question I can always whatzapp her, she offered I can always text her should anything come up. Anyways back to the 4rth day of coming back she tells me: lets say im out of town , u do the work. Now I was being very open with her that computer is very unknown to me , im coming without any background computer, I felt like 2 days going over the computer was kind of a short time for me , but she still wanted me to figure it out . Now my anxiety hit up like a bomb! I felt lost and really unsure , but I stared doing it, certain things I did well certain things I skipped to do but she wasn't willing to direct me so it just didnt go smoothly, I felt the bosses anxiousness that im getting it after she 3 times repeating, I kept telling her she should understand that its pretty new to me everything and I need some time... anyway yesterday I ended up really learning and pick it up , along with that came lots of mistakes but I learned a lot! Its a very detailed responsibility job, its not lots of hours . Its only 2 hours , like she doesnt get too many orders a day but could be I got just so overwhelmed from one day gave me all the information, all the details, different pkjs... lots of things to know and honestly I feel I can do it but I would need another 2-3 days till I get really comfortable with it, it comes scanning papers too and printing out things which I picked up yesterday everything how it works just I came home extremely weak! mentally overwhelmed, I havnt done such a kind of job ever! I just wasnt up to do anything in my house or cooking for shabbos , that was just the overwhelmness of the learning process and I felt maybe im dumb , and questioned myself why it took me longer then others to get it. Then I was thinking its really NEW to me .
What do u guys think is 3 days enough for being trained in?? This job comes with lots of memorization and concentration, she expects me next week to come in and know the job already . I feel I picked up a ton yesterday but I feel mistakes will still happen probably next time, I feel I need another 2 days to learn . The thing is here that she has to go back to her homeplace and she cannot return till she sets someone really confident into the job she can rely on. So im in doubt now if I should wait it out another day or just put it off now since I dont feel 100% confident. I was very very tense and pressured @ the job and if I will continue be so pressured and needing to deal with anxiety every single time and come home nervous to my kids its really not worth it. @ the other hand I really feel disappointed to give it up , I feel 2 hours a day I can really benifit and gain experience and confidence, it can do a lot of good to me. So here I am doubting.

We really communicated well, we like each others, she is perfect with accommodating ect. The problem is just with my having computer fright. Im really sad about it. I want the job but im not 100% comfortable that know one will be around , im not used to do such work all on my own , but I feel it takes skill and learning, I was there only3 or 4 days, very detailed job for so little. She didn seem like she has most patience to train in . In other words I guess she was looking for a fast learner which is her problem because I told her straight out that I come from nothing ...
Now she didnt exclude me from the job yet and she giving me a chance to come in monday. I dont know what to do , I dont know if im capble enough for it , my concern is if any unpredictable things pop up or any issues with certain equipments how would I deal, im taking very big pressure and ull and still feel its a pity to give up since I had processed so much yesterday that I feel I should still give it a try. Does anyone else have problems or feels overwhelmed after working with computers? I know most ppl work trhough computers , I really feel horrible why im accepting it with such agony. I feel dumb, something wrong, im not coming from high educational school , I wasnt in school a lot used to hate school ... but now I really feel like id like to learn new stuff and put myself into the field and I feel with this is perfect since its so little hours and it can really be a learning experience for me. But again she has to know she can rely fully on me, she wont be here , I must feel 1,000% comfortable which right now I dont. I would give it 2 days to try it.
I think part of the slow processing is my nervousness, anxiety, feeling insecure... it bothers me tremendously!! Anyone can relate ? Or im really? difficult?! Please I feel horrible so please dont add more uncomfortableness to me. Thanks!!!

My question is again: 4 days I should know names ... computer... lot more ?? How long normal. I would assume atleast a week.
Back to top

ssspectacular




 
 
 
 

Post  Fri, Nov 15 2019, 11:46 am
I think you're doing great! The beginnings are always hard and it's normal to come home exhausted and anxious. You'll get better with time.
Back to top

amother




Wine
 

Post  Fri, Nov 15 2019, 2:03 pm
You are using the computer to post this, aren't you? You will be fine iyh.
Back to top

cfel




 
 
 
 

Post  Fri, Nov 15 2019, 2:18 pm
Firstly, when an employee hires someone they know and expect that there would be mistakes and take it into account before they hire. Beginnings are always hard it'll definitely get easier with time. Hatzlacha!!!!!
Back to top

amother




Scarlet
 

Post  Fri, Nov 15 2019, 3:40 pm
I could totally relate..this was me about 12 years ago at my first office job...yes, the first week or two could be overwhelming and stressful..but you will get a hang at it and the more you do things again, the better you'll be at it...continue!!! don't give up!!!

she could always connect and log on to your computer while she's oversees...
if you'r motivated and determined to work, there's lots of potential!
Back to top

thunderstorm




 
 
 
 

Post  Fri, Nov 15 2019, 3:55 pm
This was exactly how I felt at my first job 20 years ago. I didn’t know how to turn a computer on. I only knew how to type. As I was told what to do , I wrote notes in a notepad so that I could know what to do step by step on my own.
It takes time though. You can’t expect to learn it all overnight. It takes at least a few weeks to feel comfortable in an office setting. The exhaustion, stress and anxiety is all NORMAL for the first couple of weeks when you start a new job and learn a whole bunch of new things. It’s very normal to feel slow compared to the others. But eventually as you get used to it , you build up speed and end up being successful. You need to be patient with yourself and trust yourself. As long as you told the boss that you are not computer literate, she knows what she’s dealing with. Making mistakes is part of learning . We learn from our mistakes. We learn through fixing our mistakes . We learn to check over our work and to be more careful. It’s all part of the learning process. I think you should give yourself a pat on your back for wanting to learn and to work. Don’t give up. If after a month you are still feeling like you did the first week, then reevaluate then. Hatzlacha!
Back to top

ora_43




 
 
 
 

Post  Sat, Nov 16 2019, 3:33 pm
You're fine! These things take time.

Having a fear of computers is an obstacle, yes, but honestly it's going to be an obstacle for a lot of jobs. So that's more reason to try to keep going now, not a reason to quit. The more you work with computers, the easier it will get, and then you'll be able to decide what job you want without this huge obstacle of "no computers, please."

If you think your boss is getting nervous, I'd tell her what you said here in a positive way. For example, "I admit I've been a bit overwhelmed learning so much at once. I feel like I'm getting the hang of it, but it might take a few more days. Is there a way it's easiest to contact you if I have questions in the next week or so?" IOW let her know that you're aware you aren't 100% there, but you do think you'll be there soon.

And now I will teach you a trick to deal with 99.9% of computer problems.

1. Go into your search engine (eg Google).

2. Type "how do I... (use hanging tags in Word/ link equations in Excel/ choose a font/ stop overwrite/ whatever applies)."

3. Choose one of the several thousand videos/posts that pop up, and follow the instructions.

People who are good with computers are amazing about sharing their knowledge online. Seriously, even if it's something super-complicated, you can usually find multiple answers online.

And it's OK not to remember everything right away! I'll be honest - I work with a few different computer programs, I've worked with Word for decades, and yet, I still find myself googling "how to turn off overwrite in Microsoft Word" a few times a year. The only things you need to remember are 1. the things you use regularly, 2. how to find instructions for the things you don't use regularly.
Back to top

ora_43




 
 
 
 

Post  Sat, Nov 16 2019, 3:42 pm
Also, OP, you seem really down on yourself Sad.

You're not dumb. You don't need to tell bosses that you aren't good with computers, or whatever else you think you aren't good with (if they need a certain skill, they'll tell you). It's OK that you don't grasp all the training immediately.

It sounds like you have a lot of anxiety around working for someone, a fear of letting them down maybe? of getting it wrong? Maybe linked to bad school experiences? I don't know, but whatever it is, it's worth trying to get past it.

Maybe find some positive mantras you can use, and when you find yourself giving yourself a negative message, replace it with a more positive one.

Eg "I can't do this" -> "I'm still learning. Learning takes time."

"I don't know if I can handle this" -> "I'm going to try. Worst case scenario, I learn something new about what kind of job doesn't work for me."

I'm sure there are some jobs that wouldn't be good for you, just like for everyone on earth, there are some jobs they aren't good at. But you want to work, you want to learn, and you're willing to show up on time, do the work, and put in the effort to get things right. That right there makes you a good employee. There are workplaces out there that will benefit from having you as an employee, no question.
Back to top

just me!!




 
 
 
 

Post  Sat, Nov 16 2019, 5:27 pm
First of all, if you wrote this loong post, you're prob not that bad at computers Very Happy Very Happy
joking aside, I used to work in an office which sounds similar to yours- just remembering what the first days looked like makes me freak out, dont worry, it takes longer then 3-4 days to get used to it!! def give it at least a month or 2 til you know all the ins and outs...
Also, you sound quite nervous that you'll not succeed and then what will you do financially...
I dont think that is doing you any good either.
Calm down, take life one step at a time, pray and stay hopefull.
Just keep on doing your best, you'll get there!!
I'd say give it lets say 4 months before you consider leaving...
In the end I loooved my job! Wishing you much hatzlach in all you do!! Smile
Back to top

oneofakind




 
 
 
 

Post  Sat, Nov 16 2019, 6:57 pm
I had a similar situation and I was a wreck in the beginning. It took time and I worked hard but it worked out at the end. Don't give up and don't pay attention to her impatience. The calmer you are, the faster you'll learn. Write out the steps to everything so you could go back and look things up so you don't have to ask so muchh. Hatzlacha!
Back to top

amother




Blush
 

Post  Sat, Nov 16 2019, 7:10 pm
My biggest advice is please write everything down as ur being taught!!! With my job I also had to learn a computer system which is very complicated in a pharmacy and instead of asking how to do a certain thing 100 times I would write it down and reference it back each time it came back. Make yourself a notebook and before you know it you won’t even need to look back anymore!
Back to top

amother




OP
 

Post  Sat, Nov 16 2019, 10:18 pm
thunderstorm wrote:
This was exactly how I felt at my first job 20 years ago. I didn’t know how to turn a computer on. I only knew how to type. As I was told what to do , I wrote notes in a notepad so that I could know what to do step by step on my own.
It takes time though. You can’t expect to learn it all overnight. It takes at least a few weeks to feel comfortable in an office setting. The exhaustion, stress and anxiety is all NORMAL for the first couple of weeks when you start a new job and learn a whole bunch of new things. It’s very normal to feel slow compared to the others. But eventually as you get used to it , you build up speed and end up being successful. You need to be patient with yourself and trust yourself. As long as you told the boss that you are not computer literate, she knows what she’s dealing with. Making mistakes is part of learning . We learn from our mistakes. We learn through fixing our mistakes . We learn to check over our work and to be more careful. It’s all part of the learning process. I think you should give yourself a pat on your back for wanting to learn and to work. Don’t give up. If after a month you are still feeling like you did the first week, then reevaluate then. Hatzlacha!


Thanks for your nice post. Made me feel much better! I just wonder why she thought after 2 days I shouldve have catched it up ?!
That made me more nervous. She said she giving me 2 more days to c if the job is for me. I do really want it though I feel its a very good computer job for a beginner since its not a ton , well there is still things to catch up. I do feel calmer since 1 part I really picked up , I still have questions hope I will have the courage to ask ...
Back to top

amother




OP
 

Post  Sat, Nov 16 2019, 10:21 pm
ora_43 wrote:
You're fine! These things take time.

Having a fear of computers is an obstacle, yes, but honestly it's going to be an obstacle for a lot of jobs. So that's more reason to try to keep going now, not a reason to quit. The more you work with computers, the easier it will get, and then you'll be able to decide what job you want without this huge obstacle of "no computers, please."

If you think your boss is getting nervous, I'd tell her what you said here in a positive way. For example, "I admit I've been a bit overwhelmed learning so much at once. I feel like I'm getting the hang of it, but it might take a few more days. Is there a way it's easiest to contact you if I have questions in the next week or so?" IOW let her know that you're aware you aren't 100% there, but you do think you'll be there soon.

And now I will teach you a trick to deal with 99.9% of computer problems.

1. Go into your search engine (eg Google).

2. Type "how do I... (use hanging tags in Word/ link equations in Excel/ choose a font/ stop overwrite/ whatever applies)."

3. Choose one of the several thousand videos/posts that pop up, and follow the instructions.

People who are good with computers are amazing about sharing their knowledge online. Seriously, even if it's something super-complicated, you can usually find multiple answers online.

And it's OK not to remember everything right away! I'll be honest - I work with a few different computer programs, I've worked with Word for decades, and yet, I still find myself googling "how to turn off overwrite in Microsoft Word" a few times a year. The only things you need to remember are 1. the things you use regularly, 2. how to find instructions for the things you don't use regularly.


Thanks so much for this tip!
Back to top

amother




OP
 

Post  Sat, Nov 16 2019, 10:24 pm
Actually I have to thank everyone here . I feel like a different person now . Were all human beings . Will keep u poster how my monday went.
Back to top
Recent Topics

Page 1 of 1 View latest: 24h 48h 72h


Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum -> Household Management -> Finances

Related Topics Replies Last Post
Other options - summer job for dd18 in brooklyn - NOT camp
by amother
5 Today at 11:50 am View last post
Looking for job in a chasidish camp- manager or
by pizza4
1 Yesterday at 4:38 am View last post
ISO contractor in Lakewood for small job
by amother
1 Sat, Feb 22 2020, 9:35 pm View last post
Job at night (in BP) 1 Fri, Feb 21 2020, 12:31 am View last post
Job placement agency/service
by amother
1 Thu, Feb 20 2020, 8:15 pm View last post

Jump to: