Women going to coed gym?

amother

Beige

Mon, Feb 10 2020, 10:14 am

amother [ Navy ] wrote:

As a "chassidish" woman,
and I use quotations bec. I know I'm not chassidish. But people tend to still call anyone that is born / married into chassidishism is chassidish. as if women cant have thier own beleifs. That or OTD. Nothing in between in many minds.

Just realize that they are chassidish women who drink starbucks, go to coed gyms, go to the beach in bathing suits, and have to live their life like their communities decide or else their kids will be kicked out of institutions, their parents may cut ties with them.

Stop with your skank eye. Trust me s omeone with a bathing suit in miami and a shaved head, didn't shave her head bec. she likes it that way.

Peace out.

Why such people would send to chassidish schools is beyond me. They obviously don't belong there, they're hippocrates.
And what exactly is wrong with drinking starbucks?????

amother

Navy

Mon, Feb 10 2020, 10:15 am

amother [ Beige ] wrote:

Why such people would send to chassidish schools is beyond me. They obviously don't belong there, they're hippocrates.
And what exactly is wrong with drinking starbucks?????

because their parents would cut ties with them?
because the 2 parents are not on the same page?
bec. they started out chassidish but changed later, but the kids are very much chassidish?

Or how about, does it make you feel like a bigger person, if you can look down on someone? Mind your own business .

amother

Black

Mon, Feb 10 2020, 10:17 am

amother [ Navy ] wrote:

I'm sorry for your situation and I respect you for sticking it out for the kids.
Doesn't mean I endorse it whatever lifestyle you're bucking, but you have my respect for sticking it out.
Still, I wish chassidish people wouldn't be seen as hypocrites because of people like you.

amother

Beige

Mon, Feb 10 2020, 10:17 am

amother [ Navy ] wrote:

It is the worst thing for kids to live a double life.
And kids repeat everything they see.

amother

Pearl

Mon, Feb 10 2020, 10:19 am

amother [ Navy ] wrote:

Was gonna say this but you said it better...

amother

Navy

Mon, Feb 10 2020, 10:19 am

amother [ Black ] wrote:

If the community woudn't be so sexist, and recognize that a woman can have her own sets of beleifs, without making the kids suffer for it.. maybe you woudn't be seen as a hypocrite. However, in chassidish circles, the internet is not really permitted. I - less of a hypocrite announce that I"m NOT chassidish. You consider yourself to be "not a hypocrite" . which I see as hypocritical.

Odelyah

Mon, Feb 10 2020, 10:21 am

amother [ Beige ] wrote:

Why such people would send to chassidish schools is beyond me. They obviously don't belong there, they're hippocrates.
And what exactly is wrong with drinking starbucks?????

Yes Hippocrates definitely does not belong in a chassidish school Wink

asmileaday

Mon, Feb 10 2020, 10:22 am

amother [ Beige ] wrote:

Leggings and short sleeves are not acceptable in the frum world, definitely not in the chassidish world.
And forget about the uncovered hair, this isn't even acceptable in most circles.
The only man that is allowed to see your hair is your husband, no shitta is meikil on this.

I may be mistaken but I think there's a big difference between leggings and short sleeves on the street vs at the gym. You're getting all up in arms as if the woman said she's strutting the street in leggings and short sleeves.

amother

Navy

Mon, Feb 10 2020, 10:23 am

amother [ Beige ] wrote:

It is the worst thing for kids to live a double life.
And kids repeat everything they see.

How do you know how hard it is for them to live a double life? I think its harder to live a repressive life, then have some relief from the repression. I think it makes them more accepting of people that are not cookie cutter. and that they can use their own brain cells to decide what kind of life they want for themselves.

amother

Blonde

Mon, Feb 10 2020, 10:25 am

amother [ Beige ] wrote:

I seen it so much that modern or JPF people are frummer then chassidish when it comes to certain things.

Thank you for "starting" a chasidim bashing thread.
People are complicated.
(First for the record, I do not eat out with my husband. I would not go swimming in an indoor swimming park, I would not go to Coed gym. I shave. I do not drive.)

I notice that their are fringe groups in JPF and MO and Yeshivish, not just by chasidim. They are culturally frum but having a hard time with yiddishkeit. Who am I to judge them. They keep shabos, kashrus and TH. I appreciate them as fellow Jews.

If you believe this trend is just in the chasidish world and in YOUR world everyone is enthusiastic about yiddishkeit you are deluding yourself....

amother

Beige

Mon, Feb 10 2020, 10:27 am

asmileaday wrote:

A co ed gym is the same as the street.

notshanarishona

Mon, Feb 10 2020, 10:27 am

amother [ Saddlebrown ] wrote:

So you're saying it's wrong for her reasons but for monetary reasons it's ok? If your rav thought it.was totally wrong he wouldn't tell you to do it because insurance would pay.

It wasn't for monetary reasons. It was for health reasons. I needed physical therapy for several months and the only local place did not have the therapists working in private rooms.

amother

Beige

Mon, Feb 10 2020, 10:28 am

amother [ Navy ] wrote:

So why don't you move to a different community?? What's keeping you back?
I'm chassidish, I live in monsey. I do not feel like anyone is trying to lead and control my life. I did feel stifled in Brooklyn, so we moved to monsey when we got married. My kids go to chassidish schools that know we have internet. By now, many chassidim have internet.
It's not all or nothing. But if you do go all out, don't call yourself chassidish and don't expect everyone to just accept you the way you are.

amother

Black

Mon, Feb 10 2020, 10:30 am

amother [ Navy ] wrote:

I'm sorry you feel that way.
What you're describing is not the reality in my very RW chassidish community. I'm not so into chassidish hock, so I don't know what goes on in others. I know that alot of how I feel is in my own mind, the reality I make, and the perceptions I build, and what I know I can live with.
My rebbi knows that I have internet, and when my kids were in the mossad of my community the mossad knew exactly how my computer was or wasn't filtered. I was completely open with them.
I don't believe in undercover, but I do believe in my beliefs.
I'm happy there is room in my community for me to be me, though I cannot go ALL THE WAY OUT and let my hair down and still expect acceptance. I believe there is a lot of space in many RW communities to do that.
Cannot talk about your parents. BH mine are healthy and treat us the same, irrespective of our hair, necklines, internet, etc.

amother

Beige

Mon, Feb 10 2020, 10:30 am

amother [ Blonde ] wrote:

My world is the chassidish world.
You're deluding yourself by saying that this doesn't go on in the chassidish world.

amother

Blonde

Mon, Feb 10 2020, 10:30 am

amother [ Navy ] wrote:

Well, if you ask educators in Brooklyn, they love teaching chasidish kids whose parents follow what you call "repressive". They are lovely kids and the parents are lovely.

asmileaday

Mon, Feb 10 2020, 10:32 am

amother [ Beige ] wrote:

So why don't you move to a different community?? What's keeping you back?

I believe there's been many threads about this topic. Feel free to search.
(Disclaimer I'm not any of these anonymous posters I just get where they're coming from.)

amother

Navy

Mon, Feb 10 2020, 10:38 am

amother [ Beige ] wrote:

Its not all or nothing fo rme either. Nobody controls me anymore. But I assume kids are controlled the same amount in brooklyn and in monsey. Many chassidiim have internet despite the intenret asifas and the clear prohibition. So I thin that is more hypcoritical than me saying I have a completely different set of beliefs.

I dont get your point. I shoudl live somewhere where I have a bigger lawn? Soemtimes people live where they have to for work, business, etc. and lets not forget how hard it is to get kids into new chassidish institutions.