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Can everyone calm down and stop being mean and bossy?
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notshanarishona




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Mar 25 2020, 5:24 pm
Simple1 wrote:
Did people ask doctors or shailos before assuming this means newly married children - who still call their parents house home? I just feel in life we should always try to do what's right, but NOT look down everyone else's backs. DLKZ. I can't imagine having the nisayon of needing to change pesach plans.


Yes . Many rabbanim have stated very clearly no one should be traveling out of town for Pesach and if single kids who are sent home from their dorms come they need go quarantine for 14 days . There are many people in the same situation (I happen to not be one of them - having lived in E"Y we made Pesach from the beginning but I have several siblings who have never made Pesach ).
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Simple1




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Mar 25 2020, 5:31 pm
notshanarishona wrote:
Yes . Many rabbanim have stated very clearly no one should be traveling out of town for Pesach and if single kids who are sent home from their dorms come they need go quarantine for 14 days . There are many people in the same situation (I happen to not be one of them - having lived in E"Y we made Pesach from the beginning but I have several siblings who have never made Pesach ).


My question is if there is a grey area. Obviously established families should stay home. I know of young couples who are already "home" (at their parents) for pesach. Not that much different than my seminary dd who was forced to come home for Pesach.
I don't know if it's right, but I'll leave Hashem to do the judging.
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Simple1




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Mar 25 2020, 5:36 pm
renslet wrote:
Seriously, if I was 6 weeks pregnant, I would stay home and not go anywhere. There is nobody yet in the world who has had this virus in the first trimester and finished their pregnancy and the Drs have no idea if this virus affects a fetus like zika or rubella.
If it's just two people, how difficult can making pesach be. Honestly??
I'm not trying to be bossy, I'm quite terrified for you that you don't realize how dangerous this virus can be for you and your unborn baby (he should be healthy and well)


You have a point there. I do feel bad for everyone in this difficult situation
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amother




Pink
 

Post  Wed, Mar 25 2020, 5:37 pm
amother [ Coffee ] wrote:
My sis makes her dh take off outer layers outside and head straight to shower- before touching anyone or anything Then throws clothing,which were put in bag, into washer.

We all got sick!
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amother




Lawngreen
 

Post  Wed, Mar 25 2020, 5:38 pm
notshanarishona wrote:
Yes . Many rabbanim have stated very clearly no one should be traveling out of town for Pesach and if single kids who are sent home from their dorms come they need go quarantine for 14 days . There are many people in the same situation (I happen to not be one of them - having lived in E"Y we made Pesach from the beginning but I have several siblings who have never made Pesach ).


Single kids that came home from seminary or yeshiva did not go into quarantine over here. At least nobody that I know did.

Honestly, I truly don't get the difference between a single adult coming home for Pesach and a newly married couple. Not at all the same as family with six kids packing into Bubby and Zeidy. Especially if the parents are young.

Many people are still going to work. People who work in groceries, doctors and nurses, police... It's not as if the world has shut down. We are trying to minimize the damage, but there is no real way to eliminate this completely. Unless the entire country goes on real lockdown, which it has not yet done.

And if you live in the New York area, experts say that everyone's already been exposed there.

I think the judgment on this thread is over the top.
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amother




Lawngreen
 

Post  Wed, Mar 25 2020, 5:41 pm
amother [ Pink ] wrote:
We all got sick!


Everyone is sick. Every family I know has one or two or more sick.
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amother




Pink
 

Post  Wed, Mar 25 2020, 6:48 pm
amother [ Lawngreen ] wrote:
Everyone is sick. Every family I know has one or two or more sick.

Yes. And it’s so so tough! I wish I can kick this already so that I have strength for my kids
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Mama Bear




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Mar 25 2020, 7:17 pm
Disclaimer:
I'm very vocal about people needing to stay home and schools/shuls needing to be shut. I havent left my house since Friday. My kids are sitting home with me losing their minds. But I'm keeping the rules.

But the entire city isn't on Milan-style lockdown. There are still instances in which people can leave their homes. Or even visit parents.

The only people who need to be under 100% quarantine and not leave the house even for groceries, or have anyone over no matter what, are
1) people who have coronavirus
2) people who are at high risk

If youre a young newlywed and your parents are young, I.e. in their 40's, going to them for the seder is no different than whats youve been doing til now.
if your parents are in their 60s or in the high risk group then no, you shouldnt go to them.

My parents are 65. My sister who has 3 pitzies and lives in a shoebox apartment will have to make pesach this year. She is terrified, but even worse, my parents are incredibly sad to have to be all alone for the seder.

But it's pikuach nefesh. So no thinking twice.

My next door neighbor who is 42 years old, is going to have over her young couple (age 21) for the seder. Her young couple is still coming over to eat dinner. We are not under Milan-level lockdown where no one may leave their house for any reason, ever.

People over 60 or with at risk reasons should take much stronger precautions than others.
people shouldnt roam the streets for unnecessary reasons.

But a 22 yr old who isnt immunocompromised can go to her 44 year old non immunocompromised parents for a seder.

Just my 2 cents.
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renslet




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Mar 25 2020, 7:38 pm
Really, I don't live in the USA but after hearing about how bad it is in NYC, all the tehillim names that we are saying non stop, and the unfortunately many petiras (of even younger than 60) I was sure that people were following the rules.
We have way way fewer people with the virus and way less deaths and where I am, people are following the rules. I haven't had my cleaning lady for days and the kids have been home since last Monday.
I never thought that people were continuing to go to parents for dinners etc.
But now I don't understand. All the Rabbonim , and government officials have called for people to stay home unless necessary. Do people just ignore Rabbonim?
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watergirl




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Mar 25 2020, 7:45 pm
renslet wrote:
Really, I don't live in the USA but after hearing about how bad it is in NYC, all the tehillim names that we are saying non stop, and the unfortunately many petiras (of even younger than 60) I was sure that people were following the rules.
We have way way fewer people with the virus and way less deaths and where I am, people are following the rules. I haven't had my cleaning lady for days and the kids have been home since last Monday.
I never thought that people were continuing to go to parents for dinners etc.
But now I don't understand. All the Rabbonim , and government officials have called for people to stay home unless necessary. Do people just ignore Rabbonim?

Who knows what individual rabbonim are telling people privately? And yes there are those who are ignoring them also. I just saw a picture of a Brooklyn silver store with an english sign saying they are closed because of covid19 and a yiddish sign right next to it that says we are open, use the other door. Right next to it! To break the law to buy kleilim for kedusha! I’m sure they have been reported now that the photo is circulating.
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renslet




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Mar 25 2020, 7:51 pm
Oish, Rachmonus! How many Yidden will we have to lose before people take this seriously.
Everyone thinks that they are an exception, and maybe some are but this virus is new, spreading rapidly and a way to stop the spread is by staying home.

And for the amother above who is pregnant. Going to parents, who are going to the store and maybe having more guests and others could introduce the virus which you could then get. Do you want that risk?

I'm not saying any of this is easy, but people are dying way younger than 60. Let's try our best , follow the Rabbonim, follow the government guidelines and have a chag kosher vesameach
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Mama Bear




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Mar 25 2020, 9:19 pm
There honestly needs to be one big coronavirus thread so the same thing isnt discussed 85,000 times over and over.

Let me repeat.

THERE IS NOT A MILAN-STYLE LOCKDOWN IN THE U.S. OR IN NEW YORK.
People dont have to show a paper to the police explaining why they are going out.
People are still going out.
People are not congregating in groups.
People are not visiting other people who are over 60.
People are not going shopping other than food (and to a few sneaky stores who are breaking the rules but I have no part in that).
People over 60 don't leave their homes. At all.

There is no rule stating that a 20 year old can't spend time at her 40 year old parents' home.
If there would be a Milan-level lockdown where NO ONE may leave their home that would be another story.

Whoever caught the virus & is now sick, caught it over Purim, which was 2 weeks ago.
There is virtually no way to be 100% sure that you won't catch the virus, unless you're literally in a sterilized room wearing sterilized clothing. You don't know who touched the containers of food you bought, the box that got delivered. The magazine you're reading. Etc etc etc.
People are already living in fear as it is. There's no reason to add more fear.

If a 22 yr old wants to go to her 42 yr old parents for the seder, there's absolutely no reason to tar and feather her. She isnt going to her 62 year old mother. Or her 55 year old father who is a cancer survivor. She doesnt have an immunocompromised little brother. Etc. Some saichel should be used.

Anyway, I left imamother a long time ago and I now see why I should never come back. There is NO toeles in this crazy, stressed out times we're living in, to spend all this time here excoriating and berating anonymous peoples' anonymous choices. We know nothing about them or their circumstances.

Peace out.
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Simple1




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Mar 25 2020, 9:34 pm
Thank you mamabear. You wrote way better than I did. There's a lot of black and white thinking here. Bottom line is to keep social interaction as minimal as possible. And yes, I am taking the social distancing thing very seriously.
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mommy3b2c




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Mar 25 2020, 9:48 pm
amother [ Seafoam ] wrote:
Beshaa tova. If you are married and pregnant, then there's a husband in the picture, right? He can do the minimal cleaning that's needed and you can go online to buy paper goods and groceries, or even cater. If your parents live nearby, maybe they can cook extra and send you food.

When I think of people who cannot make Pesach, I'm thinking of an infirm person living alone, or a family with multiple special needs children. I'm sure you feel overwhelmed, and that's reasonable, but you really aren't in such bad shape.


I don’t see how you can know what shape she’s in. When I’m early pregnant I spend most of my day with my face in a toilet. When there’s no more food I vomit bile, when there’s no more bile, I vomit blood. I don’t see how I could have made Pesach in that situation. I am doing my part to stay home as much as possible and I follow all the rules, but people also have to use common sense. A young couple going to their parents for the whole Pesach is no more dangerous then going to the grocery.
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amother




Tangerine
 

Post  Wed, Mar 25 2020, 10:04 pm
Mama Bear wrote:
There honestly needs to be one big coronavirus thread so the same thing isnt discussed 85,000 times over and over.

Let me repeat.

THERE IS NOT A MILAN-STYLE LOCKDOWN IN THE U.S. OR IN NEW YORK.
People dont have to show a paper to the police explaining why they are going out.
People are still going out.
People are not congregating in groups.
People are not visiting other people who are over 60.
People are not going shopping other than food (and to a few sneaky stores who are breaking the rules but I have no part in that).
People over 60 don't leave their homes. At all.

There is no rule stating that a 20 year old can't spend time at her 40 year old parents' home.
If there would be a Milan-level lockdown where NO ONE may leave their home that would be another story.

Whoever caught the virus & is now sick, caught it over Purim, which was 2 weeks ago.
There is virtually no way to be 100% sure that you won't catch the virus, unless you're literally in a sterilized room wearing sterilized clothing. You don't know who touched the containers of food you bought, the box that got delivered. The magazine you're reading. Etc etc etc.
People are already living in fear as it is. There's no reason to add more fear.

If a 22 yr old wants to go to her 42 yr old parents for the seder, there's absolutely no reason to tar and feather her. She isnt going to her 62 year old mother. Or her 55 year old father who is a cancer survivor. She doesnt have an immunocompromised little brother. Etc. Some saichel should be used.

Anyway, I left imamother a long time ago and I now see why I should never come back. There is NO toeles in this crazy, stressed out times we're living in, to spend all this time here excoriating and berating anonymous peoples' anonymous choices. We know nothing about them or their circumstances.

Peace out.


50% of the hospitalizations are for people under 50.
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renslet




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Mar 25 2020, 10:12 pm
So when the politicians repeat again and again, "stay home, unless you need food, medicine or essential work" they also mean, and pesach???
There are teshuvos being written as we speak about people with anxiety and other challenges, about what to do on a three day Yom tov. Some of the answers (if one might be suicidal) involve Seder over zoom or in great need, leaving a phone line open all Yom tov and hearing others.
If it's so simple why aren't they saying, just move into someone's house, as long as they are not in the at risk group.
I'm just baffled. Trying really hard not to judge but as more and more of my friends send messages for us to daven for their fathers and (young ) husbands, I'm wondering what will it take for people to realize that this year is different and from what it sounds like people haven't gotten the memo yet.

And do we really need to wait for a complete lockdown. Don't we value human life that we can do our best to stay home even if not mandatory
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amother




Scarlet
 

Post  Wed, Mar 25 2020, 10:39 pm
I wish we would just have a complete lockdown already. I am so irate at the people here who think everything that suits them is OK. My favorite might be that it is ok to go to Florida, even though they said they you aren't welcome and there is a travel ban, because you live in Brooklyn and your apartment is small and you have lots of kids, so you NEED the vacation. Even though they have a takanah that you are not welcome to use the S.FL Shuls, stores, and Mikvah..... people are accusing a poor ML of making people sin because she is upkeep the psak of the community.
I lose more and more respect for people here every day. (not all of you, just some-some of you are awesome)
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imorethanamother




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Mar 25 2020, 10:55 pm
amother [ Tangerine ] wrote:
50% of the hospitalizations are for people under 50.


Source, please.
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amother




Seafoam
 

Post  Wed, Mar 25 2020, 10:55 pm
mommy3b2c wrote:
I don’t see how you can know what shape she’s in. When I’m early pregnant I spend most of my day with my face in a toilet. When there’s no more food I vomit bile, when there’s no more bile, I vomit blood. I don’t see how I could have made Pesach in that situation. I am doing my part to stay home as much as possible and I follow all the rules, but people also have to use common sense. A young couple going to their parents for the whole Pesach is no more dangerous then going to the grocery.


You don't know what shape she's in either. I puked my way through my pregnancies - and not just the beginning, either. She has my sympathies. As do you. I know how tough it can be.

That said, combining households, after everyone has been going off in different directions, is not a good idea. I'm pretty sure that's the medical consensus.
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imorethanamother




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Mar 25 2020, 11:10 pm
amother [ Lawngreen ] wrote:
Single kids that came home from seminary or yeshiva did not go into quarantine over here. At least nobody that I know did.

Honestly, I truly don't get the difference between a single adult coming home for Pesach and a newly married couple. Not at all the same as family with six kids packing into Bubby and Zeidy. Especially if the parents are young.

Many people are still going to work. People who work in groceries, doctors and nurses, police... It's not as if the world has shut down. We are trying to minimize the damage, but there is no real way to eliminate this completely. Unless the entire country goes on real lockdown, which it has not yet done.

And if you live in the New York area, experts say that everyone's already been exposed there.

I think the judgment on this thread is over the top.


I completely agree. People are losing their minds. Everyone can make their own choices.

I think that the most adamant people on this thread don't realize that this isn't a couple of weeks and it's all done.
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