People are so confused

mommy3b2c

Thu, Apr 02 2020, 10:16 am

I don’t understand why people are fighting so hard for women to be allowed to have someone during labor and not fighting for Covid 19 patients to have an advocate. I’m not saying it’s easy to give birth alone, but these are difficult times. But patients with Covid 19 are DYING because they don’t have an advocate. Including a man in his forties that I know. No one is going to die from giving birth alone. I really don’t understand this.

(And I gave birth to my third child alone because my husband was in the emergency room with a bad case of the flu. And it was not in a time like this where there is some comfort in knowing that others are in the same boat and in the knowledge that you are sacrificing for the greater good.)

DrMom

Thu, Apr 02 2020, 10:30 am

I guess because Covid-19 patients are all contagious, and are placed in wards with other infected patients. Nobody wants more people than necessary running around onside those areas.

Pregnant women and their husbands are not (by default) sick, so the risk is lower. Still a risk, though.

I think when that thread was started, Covid-19 hadn't blown up yet in the NYC area.

ora_43

Thu, Apr 02 2020, 12:18 pm

It's horrible that people with covid-19 are alone, but getting visitors to them poses a much bigger logistical problem. They're highly contagious, there isn't enough protective equipment for doctors and nurses let alone visitors, the visitors would be exposed (and also, doctors would be exposed to visitors) for days or weeks, often wards are crowded.

What makes you say that covid-19 patients, specifically, are dying because of a lack of advocates?

amother

Cerulean

Thu, Apr 02 2020, 12:39 pm

mommy3b2c wrote:

I completely agree with you mommy3b2c. It’s hard to give birth alone, but I don’t think it can compare to having deathly ill patients alone.
It’s not a popular discussion here on imamother. I tried to talk about terrible experiences with nursing staff at a certain hospital yesterday. I was told to stop whining (yes really), I have no right to expect five star service (nurses providing basic medical care is now considered five star), and to be grateful for getting free medical care (I pay a lot for medical care, but happen to think people who can’t afford to pay don’t deserve to die).
I am forever grateful to the nursing staff at different hospitals that have done everything from providing urgent care to making me a tea when I got to the point after a surgery that I could have one. I am also forever traumatized by uncaring nurses that were criminally negligent in performing their duties, and not during a pandemic.
I’m so sorry for the loss you experienced. There must be a way to have a close family member be present and advocate for a patient that is in a life threatening condition.

mommy3b2c

Thu, Apr 02 2020, 4:20 pm

ora_43 wrote:

Because they are. The doctors and nurses are over burdened and they are not noticing when patients are in distress. if there was an advocate there, they can call the doctor.

agreer

Thu, Apr 02 2020, 6:57 pm

I agree with the OP. Absolutely correct, but BOTH should be able to have ONE visitor. There can be strict rules, such as age requirements, not leaving, etc, but it's shameful that people are going to the hospital to be placed on vents by themselves. Horrible, terrible, disgraceful. No one should have to die alone.

If you know of a petition I can sign, send it my way. Please.

amother

White

Thu, Apr 02 2020, 7:38 pm

mommy3b2c wrote:

So here’s the thing. In my hospital only labor and delivery allow you a partner.

I get it. I do. In fact it makes my life easier to have someone with you.

But here’s the thing. All my coworkers are getting sick. I mean ALL of them. No other department is having this issue. So now you have your husband, but what you don’t know is that now you have a newbie nurse that’s never done this before or a nurse who retired five years ago and they dragged her back. (Which explains the testiness, according to you that one poster)

So you traded your feelings for medical personnel. Your husband is there but now my amazing coworker with a decade of experience is not. I mean, again, I get it. But now we are so bad that our hospital demanded that we come to work even while sick with coronavirus.

Are we all happy now?

Einikel

Thu, Apr 02 2020, 7:43 pm

agreer wrote:

http://chng.it/bHmWm8cNm8

amother

Aquamarine

Thu, Apr 02 2020, 7:43 pm

I totally get it. I’d want my husband with me under any circumstances. But NOT if it means that there are dozens of other supportive-but-sick husbands around infecting an entire l&d staff and doctors. That is FAR more terrifying than being alone and not worth it! A friend of mine tested positive, ended up delivering and was so sick that she ended up in the ICU. Should all delivering mothers risk that? Because some women need a partner? (Asking honestly, because I am beH due in October.)