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Poll Are you allowing your kids to play with other kids(NY)?
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Poll

Are you allowing your kids to play with other kids (NY)?
Yes
 39%  [ 92 ]
Yes - but only with precautions (masks, only outside and etc)
 8%  [ 20 ]
Yes - but only the older kids who I can trust to stay apart
 2%  [ 5 ]
Yes - but only with the same 1-2 families
 14%  [ 33 ]
No
 34%  [ 80 ]
other
 2%  [ 5 ]
Total Votes : 235


amother




OP
 

Post  Mon, May 18 2020, 6:52 pm
We have been very good with SD till now. I live in a small 2 bedroom apt on the 5th floor (no porch) with 4 kids (our move got pushed off bec of corona). Its been very hard but I've kept my kids away from the kids in the building and outside till now. I've been taking them out early/late to play when no ones been around. Today, after shleping everyone/everything down, even though we went out really early, there were a bunch of other families out and playing on both sides of the street. I gave in and let my kids play with the family that was out in front of our building... They sort of kept a little distance, but their little kids.... now I feel guilty about it.

I know everyone has to weigh the risks etc themselves, but am just curious what others are doing... Is it still completely wrong if I allow my kids to play with others? Honestly even though its hard, I could probably manage doing this longer except that I live in a very dense area - kids are in the hallways where we live, all over outside.... and its just so hard to constantly be telling/reminding my kids to stay away....
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amother




Honeydew
 

Post  Mon, May 18 2020, 6:59 pm
The night my 10 yr old sobbed out of loneliness I gave up. This kid is getting very spoiled and there are 2/3 families I let him play with as all our children are the same ages.

Am I right? Am I wrong?

Is mental health of a child important enough? I think so.
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amother




Aqua
 

Post  Mon, May 18 2020, 7:26 pm
My kids play with kids on the block. We don’t invite friends but when all the kids are out it happens by itself and I don’t pull my kids back.
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amother




Red
 

Post  Mon, May 18 2020, 7:28 pm
amother [ Honeydew ] wrote:
The night my 10 yr old sobbed out of loneliness I gave up. This kid is getting very spoiled and there are 2/3 families I let him play with as all our children are the same ages.

Am I right? Am I wrong?

Is mental health of a child important enough? I think so.


Physical health of all of you, and all the other families involved is more important
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amother




Orchid
 

Post  Mon, May 18 2020, 7:46 pm
My kids now play 8 ft from friends sitting or biking.
No balls
Have to use own jumpropes
Chairs are setup 8 ft away. Siblings sit next to each other.
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gold21




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, May 18 2020, 7:50 pm
Testing is now widely available in NY and easy to access. Everyone with any sort of symptom is encouraged to get tested and groups of people with no symptoms who would have never thought to test are actively being tested (nursing home staff, etc). The number of new cases on May 17 (yesterday) was listed at 1,250.

Compare that number to early to mid April, when testing was a lot harder to access and people were discouraged from getting tested if their symptoms were mild- thereby missing a lot of cases. The number of new cases on April 14 was listed at 11,571.

So B"H things have gotten a lot better and the surge is behind NY. But covid is still out there.

I don't think people have to be expected to behave as strictly as they did when case numbers were so high. On the flip side, it would be foolish to let your guard down too much.

Try to make wise, common sense decisions.

If there's one family you trust has been carefully isolating, and you have been carefully isolating, allowing your children to play with those children in an outdoor setting, is one possibility.

Getting big groups of kids together in someone's house would be pretty foolish. Covid is still out there. Proceed with caution.

Be safe. Be smart.

Stay safe, all.
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Mama Bear




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, May 18 2020, 10:18 pm
at some point you will have to go outside and mingle with people again. at some point you will have to take the calculated risk. whether it's now, next month, or the month after that.
The virus transmission has really gone down. There are no new cases in the community that I've even heard of.
2 months of being locked in a house without a porch, with no social interaction with othr children, really takes a mental and social toll on a child.
If it were me I'd allow it at this point. It's not the height of the pandemic anymore.
Just my 2 cents.
(full disclosure: my kid never stopped playing with the neighbor's kids. No one in that family ever caught the virus, from the 44 yr old parents down to the 6 yr old youngest.)
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giselle




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, May 18 2020, 10:26 pm
I’m in NJ, but I think it’s similar enough to NY. I recently started letting my kids play with others outside. I think it’s time for the world to start opening up again, with an understanding that yes a second wave can come, and at that point we need to all social distance once more. But we can’t sit around and wait and stay apart until then. I feel that limiting socializing to outdoors and being careful to wash hands whenever coming inside the house is enough of a precaution right now. I haven’t yet taken back my cleaning help.
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mommy3b2c




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, May 18 2020, 10:31 pm
amother [ Red ] wrote:
Physical health of all of you, and all the other families involved is more important


Absolutely. It’s more important to potentially save an unnamed, unknown person from possibly getting sick then it is to save your child from sinking into debilitating depression...

(I’m being sarcastic)

The curve is flattened!! Don’t let the cure be worse then the disease.
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amother




Tan
 

Post  Mon, May 18 2020, 10:34 pm
I wud love if everyone also writes the location along with the poll. So maybe we do it here. Monsey. Yes my kids already mingle without SD. (We can leave the opinions and bashing for a different thread. I’d really love to know just the FACTS where families of kids are still keeping SD or not.)
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soap suds




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, May 18 2020, 10:37 pm
mommy3b2c wrote:
Absolutely. It’s more important to potentially save an unnamed, unknown person from possibly getting sick then it is to save your child from sinking into debilitating depression...

(I’m being sarcastic)

The curve is flattened!! Don’t let the cure be worse then the disease.


It’s not that the unnamed person’s life isn’t worth saving, it’s just that at this point the probability of that risk is so minute, that your child’s mental health takes precedence.
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wiki




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, May 18 2020, 10:38 pm
I will let my kids play with other kids, probably, in a few weeks. If right now it's still not allowed for the men to daven with proper social distancing, it's not time yet for the kids to play.

This past Shabbos my kids were playing with the next door kids, for the first time in two months. I told them gently to remember to keep their distance (my 3 yo and 6 yo are pros at this!), and didn't enforce as strictly as I would have in the past. But we're not yet at the stage where I'd just lechatchila allow it. Soon.

There are still over a thousand new cases a day. There's a reason NYC isn't opened up yet. Yes, the curve is BH flattening and the trends are excellent. We're almost there. I can't wait to reopen. But reopening too soon might undo all the months of effort until now.

I'm in NYC and I have a teeny tiny yard. I sympathize with people living in apartments; must be a lot harder.
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gold21




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, May 18 2020, 10:40 pm
giselle wrote:
I’m in NJ, but I think it’s similar enough to NY. I recently started letting my kids play with others outside. I think it’s time for the world to start opening up again, with an understanding that yes a second wave can come, and at that point we need to all social distance once more. But we can’t sit around and wait and stay apart until then. I feel that limiting socializing to outdoors and being careful to wash hands whenever coming inside the house is enough of a precaution right now. I haven’t yet taken back my cleaning help.


Yeah. I think using common sense and caution is a good way to handle a gradual decrease in social distancing. Every mom just needs to use common sense. Don't get big groups of kids together in your basement. A couple of neighbors outdoors seems like a good re-entry plan.
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amother




Fuchsia
 

Post  Mon, May 18 2020, 10:44 pm
My kids are playing with neighbors since the week after pesach. There are only 4 other families here on my block and we all had covid symptoms after purim (like the rest of the city) and were fine by pesach. Althogh otherwise we were strictly socially distancing, I didnt think this was unsafe at the time. By now, I pretty much let them play with kids from other blocks, and they even had a sleepover by relatives this shabbas!! Enough of this crazy lockdown already!!! its nearly pointless!!
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mommy3b2c




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, May 18 2020, 10:48 pm
soap suds wrote:
It’s not that the unnamed person’s life isn’t worth saving, it’s just that at this point the probability of that risk is so minute, that your child’s mental health takes precedence.


Of course we would save the life of an unnamed person. But that’s not what’s actually happening here at this point.
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amother




Azure
 

Post  Mon, May 18 2020, 10:49 pm
No, my kids aren't playing with other kids.
They had their first distant "playdate" - sitting 15 feet away from each other on the front lawn just the other day, but they are otherwise keeping each other occupied.
The rabbanim of our community have instructed us to keep up the SD until further notice.
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amother




Tan
 

Post  Mon, May 18 2020, 10:59 pm
amother [ Fuchsia ] wrote:
My kids are playing with neighbors since the week after pesach. There are only 4 other families here on my block and we all had covid symptoms after purim (like the rest of the city) and were fine by pesach. Althogh otherwise we were strictly socially distancing, I didnt think this was unsafe at the time. By now, I pretty much let them play with kids from other blocks, and they even had a sleepover by relatives this shabbas!! Enough of this crazy lockdown already!!! its nearly pointless!!

Agree with you. Just curious where you’re located?
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amother




Tan
 

Post  Mon, May 18 2020, 11:00 pm
amother [ Azure ] wrote:
No, my kids aren't playing with other kids.
They had their first distant "playdate" - sitting 15 feet away from each other on the front lawn just the other day, but they are otherwise keeping each other occupied.
The rabbanim of our community have instructed us to keep up the SD until further notice.

Location?
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amother




Cerise
 

Post  Mon, May 18 2020, 11:01 pm
No playing with other children. My oldest (preteen) has "porch dates" with friends where the person who lives in the house stays on the porch and the visitor stays on the sidewalk. Otherwise it's been a lot of video chatting.

None of us have had any coronavirus symptoms yet even though it's in our neighborhood. We're not taking any chances, not only because we don't want to get it, but because we'd really love to be able to visit with our parents/grandparents again normally instead of occasional socially distanced visits in backyards. We don't want to risk our children being asymptomatic carriers and passing the virus to anyone at risk.
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itsmeima




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, May 18 2020, 11:07 pm
I live in a two-bedroom apt with three big boys, I get it! It's hard, but it's possible!

Don't give up!
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