Home

Can we please stop with the color schemes?
Previous  1, 2, 3, 4
 
Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum -> Relationships -> Simcha Section


View latest: 24h 48h 72h


ROFL




 
 
 
 

Post  Wed, Sep 02 2020, 11:48 pm
A friend of mine when her youngest got married put out the word to all her friends. Wear those gowns sitting in your closet Get all dressed up and come and have fun. It was wonderful to see all the women dressed in their gowns and just having a blast. She hated the fact that she had loads of gowns in different sizes in her closet This was a fun wedding and all enjoyed.
Back to top

amother




Navy
 

Post  Wed, Sep 02 2020, 11:53 pm
For my wedding I asked my Family and friends to wear pastel colored gowns. Nobody rented any dress or paid to buy a dress. Everybody was able to borrow pastel dress except for one friend who got a bright aqua dress. We just had fun and I did not want anyone to spend extra money.
I guess I was traumatized by being a bridesmaid for a wedding where the dress cost $500 and it had big flowers and other designs on the dress. I hated the whole experience and could not say no to this one friend.
By the time I got married I wanted no stress with anyone on dresses.
Back to top

ChossidMom




 
 
 
 

Post  Thu, Sep 03 2020, 12:46 am
amother [ Navy ] wrote:
For my wedding I asked my Family and friends to wear pastel colored gowns. Nobody rented any dress or paid to buy a dress. Everybody was able to borrow pastel dress except for one friend who got a bright aqua dress. We just had fun and I did not want anyone to spend extra money.
I guess I was traumatized by being a bridesmaid for a wedding where the dress cost $500 and it had big flowers and other designs on the dress. I hated the whole experience and could not say no to this one friend.
By the time I got married I wanted no stress with anyone on dresses.


Why on earth should I or anyone have to buy or even BORROW a dress in a specific color (or "pastel") just to attend someone's happy day? A wedding is an occasion of Jewish SIMCHA. Not a parade or exhibition.
Why can't I just put on a nice Shabbos dress and be happy with you?

It's called societal "norms".

It's not a Jewish concept.

I'm so happy we don't have to deal with this (not yet, anyway. I guess it depens whom my sons marry...)
Back to top

amother




Tan
 

Post  Thu, Sep 03 2020, 12:53 am
My tiny Covid wedding was a hot mess 😂 only 10 people, everyone wore a different color, whatever was in their closet that was wedding appropriate, decorations came from various stores and Amazon. But I wouldn’t have had it any other way ❤️
Back to top

amother




Navy
 

Post  Thu, Sep 03 2020, 2:19 am
I don’t know why you are yelling. I presume that your friends wear clothing to a wedding. Generally they wear more than a jeans and a tshirt ??? So if my bridesmaids were going to wear gowns to my wedding which they wanted to. They had to brow dress from somewhere. If they were able to borrow pastel ones that is great. The one who wore aqua - well that was a dress that she found that fit her and looked well.
I know you live in israel but if you look at chardi or chassidsh wedding in the US you would see that the dress people rent or even gmach are more fancier and more of a societal norm -
Even for weekday. Walk thru Boro park or Williamsburg and you will see that the norms there is a matching clothing for every child. All the girls are wearing the same dress and the little boys have shirt to match the girls dress. So you have five girls and three boys walking down the street as a parade. ( and when you see loads of families doing the same thing how do you respond to that ?)
I always wondered if I was the youngest child how I would feel to ahve hand me downs of the same dress for years and years. I was then filled in that families who dress like this don’t hand clothes down from one child to the next !


ChossidMom wrote:
Why on earth should I or anyone have to buy or even BORROW a dress in a specific color (or "pastel") just to attend someone's happy day? A wedding is an occasion of Jewish SIMCHA. Not a parade or exhibition.
Why can't I just put on a nice Shabbos dress and be happy with you?

It's called societal "norms".

It's not a Jewish concept.

I'm so happy we don't have to deal with this (not yet, anyway. I guess it depens whom my sons marry...)
Back to top

ChossidMom




 
 
 
 

Post  Thu, Sep 03 2020, 2:33 am
I'm not yelling.

And, if you live in the U.S. then the norms are fancier there than in Israel and kol hakavod for doing your own thing.

You're right about Boro Park etc. I don't think HKB"H meant for us to be so caught up in how we look. Dress nicely, clean, neat and be a mentch. Your (People's) kids don't have to all match and you don't have to buy designer clothing. It's obviously your business what you choose to buy but I am saying that this is not Jewish and there's nothing anyone can say that will make it Jewish. This generation is in a pretty sad state. There are great things about it but the emphasis on materialism has just gone haywire. To the point where people think that certain phenomenon is normal.
I have trouble with this. Especially when the norms affect what my kids think is normal.
Back to top

Moonlight




 
 
 
 

Post  Thu, Sep 03 2020, 3:05 am
I am the third girl in my family. My mother declared we are not doing a color scheme and I didnt comment as we were disagreeing about other things. My pictures look stupid because my mother wore navy, my mil wore burgandy, and my sisters and SILs wore: black, white, blue, brown, black. Like couldn't we coordinate a little? I regret not pushing it more.
And we always get from gmach. I think we just pay the cleaning fee.
Back to top

Ruchel




 
 
 
 

Post  Thu, Sep 03 2020, 5:32 am
amother [ Taupe ] wrote:
In America many ppl spend above $400 to rent a gown. (Rentals for sister and mother of bride range $250-600 and up). So if there are a few sisters and nieces that cost can balloon quickly.


cringe... I got several custom for that price
Back to top

Ruchel




 
 
 
 

Post  Thu, Sep 03 2020, 5:37 am
The problem is when people make it a norm
Back to top

DVOM




 
 
 
 

Post  Thu, Sep 03 2020, 6:25 am
But I love gowns! How many times in my life will I get to wear one??? They're so beautiful!
Back to top

1091




 
 
 
 

Post  Thu, Sep 03 2020, 7:02 am
And I don’t think this is new. My brother is 51 and I distinctly remember the gown my mother wore to his bar mitzvah. And she wore gowns to siblings weddings that took place in the 1960s/70s. Today, so much simpler because you can buy off the rack gowns that are not expensive.
Back to top

imasoftov




 
 
 
 

Post  Mon, Sep 07 2020, 12:21 pm
I'm watching a streaming wedding right now. no women are wearing matching colors. Before the chuppah started, I wouldn't have been able to pick out the chatan's mother, grandmother, or sisters if I didn't know them and I don't know the kallah's family so I was only able to tell who her mother is because she walked down the aisle with her.
Back to top
Previous  1, 2, 3, 4 Recent Topics

Page 4 of 4 View latest: 24h 48h 72h


Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum -> Relationships -> Simcha Section

Related Topics Replies Last Post
Paint color challenge
by amother
5 Yesterday at 10:54 am View last post
Can’t stop crying
by amother
7 Sun, Oct 18 2020, 8:05 pm View last post
Fall color tops
by amother
4 Sun, Oct 18 2020, 4:52 pm View last post
How to get dd to stop sucking her thumb
by muss
2 Sat, Oct 17 2020, 11:06 pm View last post
Stop the snowclones!
by amother
3 Sat, Oct 17 2020, 4:00 pm View last post